Hi, I don't know if any one can but any advice will be much appreciated.
I am currently living with my ex, we've lived as friends for the past 2 year's and we are good as friends and both totally understand that we will only ever just be that way. Anyway every now and then we use each other to avoid getting into any predicaments with the opposite sex, for example pretending were engaged which is what I did. Now I've met this guy who I pretended I was engaged to at first and then when I realized I liked him I then pretended the engagement was over. I work with him and it is no secret in the office that he likes me, this is not my problem. From the first time we met there was such a strong connection I don't really know how to explain it, but my heart energy everything was so drawn to him like a magnet and I have found over the months that I think of nothing else but him constantly, no matter how I try to divert my mind it just comes back to him. When we are in the office it's like a emotional war, I catch him every now and then looking at me quite intensely and one day he'll be a happy loving guy towards me and the next he'll act like he hates me. I am older then him by around 10 years as well which concerns me. We have never opening spoken to each other about how either of us feel and it is killing me to have so much attention on him and not have any control over it. I have definitely falling in love with him, but I do not know what to do. I am thinking I don't know how to communicate to him I'm just confused and am trying desperately to see my way clear to some kind of resolution that handles this emotional torture in my heart.