why did he lie ?

[Cat&Dog]

Hi Males

I really need guys to tell me why they lie or cheat on their partners ?

I had been going out with a guy who works with me for more than a year. He didnt tell me he had a partner untill we slept together for a couple of times. For some reasons, we still went out together. I had been asking him when he was going to get married with his partner, the impression i received from him that he didnt want to get married. Then one day, he suddently told me that he was going to get married after two weeks and he had been engaged with her for almost two years. I was totall mad. I dont understand why he had been lying to me when i asked him when he was going to purpose to his partner and when he was going to marry her and why not marry her ? If he loves her and going to marry her, why he had affair wiht me ? if he doesnt love her,why he married her then ? Of course, i havent spoke to him since then and I am not going to speak to him again because I dont want to waste my time on a lier.

Cat&Dog

[damn2010]

That's what you get for getting involved with a man who is already involved with someone else.

He has no problem lying and going around HER back, what makes you so special that he's not going to lie to YOU and go around your back?

Find someone who isn't already involved with someone.

It's so sad how cheating is SO prevalent these days. What's even sadder is all the people who get involved who feel like it's "ok" and then get pissed when stuff breaks off!

[smackie9]

Cheating today is no different than cheating a hundred years ago....people just do it. This guy is obviously not ready for marriage or even committed relationships. I feel very sorry for the woman that he is marrying. I doubt very highly there's issues in their relationship....he's just a douche bag.

Tip: When you start dating someone, make sure you can stop by where they live anytime, call them anytime, and meet their friends and family. I have posted to many women who insist on dating a man that is either already has a GF or is married. I have to say you are just as guilty of the act of adultery or infidelity as much as he is. Basically you get burned in the end because he has a deep connection with her and all you are is a place to put his penis for the time being. He may tell you things are bad with his relationship, and feed you a lot of bull about how much he cares for you, loves you, the best he's ever had....it's all lies. Fact: boys, guys and men will do and say anything to get sex. And if a relationship was that bad, wouldn't you think he would end it? They never do. If a man is willing to cheat on his significant other, he is just bad news to any woman. Should have dumped him when he told you.

[TheScottj]

Hi,

Honestly, it is hard to know for sure as each guy thinks differently. But i found the most common reasons guys do things like these are:

1) They are looking for a thrill or something exciting, doing things like these can give some guys more thrills.
2) Relationship problems, Such as commitment, lack of sexual activities or no romance in his relationships.
3) A plan B, Some guys are scared that 1 relationship might fail and feel more secure having a backup girl just in-case.

I defiantly don't agree with what he has done, but i also must point out you are at fault. If a guy is already in a relationship and still is after a few weeks. It is safe to assume he has commitment issues. Although that is not always the case. It is still always best to be careful before getting too involved. Also if i was in your shoes, i would also worry... is he cheating on me too? or would he?. Something like this can drive distrust already early on in a relationship in my opinion.

Regards,
Scott

[Regnent]

Let me get this straight, you sleep with a guy a couple times, find out he's got a partner, then continue.
Then, you are upset because
uhg
never mind.

You wern't being cheated on, you were a mistress.

As to why -anyone- cheats?
Because they do. Name a reason, excuse, or situation. It's there.
Unhappy with their partner, just horny, different moral standards, boredom, being drunk/high/stupid, extended time away from partner, convenience, spite, anger, etc.

Myself, personally, if I do, it'll because my partner isn't interested in sex, and I'm not going to continue to tolerate it forever. I'll end up telling her I'm unhappy with our lack of sex life, and that's her choice, but I'm going to do what I need to do to be happy with my life. I'm not about to jump ship from my relationship, I do love my wife, and my children, but moral or ethically challenged or not, I'm not going to have a shitty sex life because my partner isn't interested.

[Lipp]

I feel sorry for the wife-to-be. I mean, really, prior to marriage all commitments may vary in scale and should either partner feel uncertain about it it's not a massive deal to break things off, but if he's cheating on her before the marriage has even taken place it's being set up to fail.

If it was up to me I'd try to let her know and break it off unless he'd come clean and they'd reconciliate. But of course that brings its own problems.

[Gribble]

You don't understand why he was lying to you?

Because you were having sex with him and he didn't want that to stop, obviously.

[Cat&Dog]

Thanks everyone for your posts.

This guy is just a selfish liar and has no conscious. He is still trying to approach me after i have been giving him a cold face for more than two months.

Agree with you all, I feel sorry for his new married wife, but i dont think it is my business to tell her what his true colour is. They have been living together for more than six years ( i also just knew), i guess she should know what he is.

[Regnent]

I have to say this. Temper your opinion of him miss.
You still continued a relationship after find out he was already in one.

I've got no problem with calling someone out, but you had as much control here as he did.

He still sounds like a looser, but if I were a woman, I wouldn't want you anywhere near my man. (Mostly because you don't seem to want to take some of the moral flack)

[shiro]

Hi Males

I really need guys to tell me why they lie or cheat on their partners ?

I had been going out with a guy who works with me for more than a year. He didnt tell me he had a partner untill we slept together for a couple of times. For some reasons, we still went out together. I had been asking him when he was going to get married with his partner, the impression i received from him that he didnt want to get married. Then one day, he suddently told me that he was going to get married after two weeks and he had been engaged with her for almost two years. I was totall mad. I dont understand why he had been lying to me when i asked him when he was going to purpose to his partner and when he was going to marry her and why not marry her ? If he loves her and going to marry her, why he had affair wiht me ? if he doesnt love her,why he married her then ? Of course, i havent spoke to him since then and I am not going to speak to him again because I dont want to waste my time on a lier.

Cat&Dog

Well men have different thoughts about why to lie. As I read your story, I think that this man is more the type that wants to settle down but then you came along. He used you for some kind of an adventure before getting married. He just used you. In general men lie because they have a hard time expressing their true feelings. I am sorry for you that this happened to you so please do not think all men are like this.

[Cat&Dog]

thanks, you might be right, which is one of reasons i was angry at him.

[hello1]

I think you should tell his girlfriend!! she deserves to know what type of man she is with! would you want to know if the man you were going to marry was a cheat?

[shiro]

thanks, you might be right, which is one of reasons i was angry at him.

Your welcome, I am glad I could have been of some use to you so are you going to tell his girlfriend/wife? Do you still like him even though you don't want to spend time on a liar?

[Cat&Dog]

:o) No, i don't think i will tell his new married wife. Sometimes being a fool is a lucky thing, and every woman has the different expectation to their man. She married him which means she must be happy with who he is or who she thinks he is. So, just let her be happy then. :o)

No, I dont like him any more. He is still good looking but I dont feel he is attractive any more. On the other hand, when I see him smiles to me, i feel physically sick :o( It was a bad "pick up" i have to say..... :o))

[Cat&Dog]

I think you should tell his girlfriend!! she deserves to know what type of man she is with! would you want to know if the man you were going to marry was a cheat?

After this experience, I will make sure the man I am going to marry is not a cheater .... lol thanks