Are these signs a man is interested?

[Crystal99]

I am confused by this person's actions and words. I work as an intern at a university and the head professor of the department who trained me for a couple of months has been acting strange. He does favors for me like give me supplies for my office, shares his coffee and muffins with me in the mornings, and has started to discuss things beyond professional topics. For instance, he brings up relationships, tells me how dating is not easy etc. He also told me 'you are smart, sweet, gorgeous, and you are a hottie. Every guy would dream of you." He gives me compliments on how I look and I catch him checking me out. During our convo about dating troubles and him telling me "you are stunning" he told me about some woman he has been dating on and off for two months and that it is not going well, he is not too happy and that there are problems. Does he like me or something? Then why would he tell me about this woman? He seems to want to talk about personal stuff and shares things with me that he won't with others. I have invited him to come by to my desk and we chat-he tells me personal confidential things regarding his life and job that only his own boss may know, saying that he trusts me. My guy friend says that when a guy does is it's because he likes you.
The weird thing is that when we are with another person he kind of avoids showing me attention-is this to avoid anyone picking up on something? People stare sometimes when we are talking in the hallway and he will say something like, "I will send you the reports soon and you type it up for me." Yes, the convo started about reports but ended up lasting about 30+ minutes and is about personal lives ect.
Last week, he even cleaned dog poop off my tires and when he does things he's like, "see how I take care of you? all the things I do for you?"

I started there several months ago. I am 22 and he is like 34-35. He seems nice and is good looking. I like him , but why would he tell me about the woman?
I want to push him in the direction to ask me out, but how????

This morning, he was telling me about someone who prank calls his house and we got into this convo about prank calling. Then he said, "Give me your number so I can prank call you."
Now, was this as a joke, or kind of hinting that he really wants my number?

I just need to feel secure that he is interested, but want to make him move in the direction to ask me out.
Do these signs sound just friendly or like something more? ( I esp. thought the coffee part was cute).




NOW, HERE ARE MY ACTIONS:

Last Thursday, I brought in bags of Kona Coffee and he wanted a cup in the break room. I made some for a few people. Then he told me on the phone that he liked it very much and I gave him two bags of it with a cute note saying, "Here is some more of that coffee you liked. I even gave you my favorite flavor." He then went when he spoke to me later on that day that I write him the best, nicest, messages.

An hour later:

he walked around the dept, past all the offices, but stopped by into mine to say, 'good morning." Only mine, nobody else's. Then this afternoon, on the phone he told me that he was drinking my coffee and that is was yummy.


I am feeling a bit more sure that he is interested romantically and it gives me a bit more guts to make the move and ask him out for coffee.




I am told that I am an attractive and smart girl, but I am feeling nervous and insecure. I don't want to risk me imagining that he likes me. This is why I need some male advice on whether he does like me, and ALSO, how else should I flirt without seeming easy?? More coffee?

[VincenzoG91]

He is definitely attracted to you, but is aware that he could get in serious trouble if he gets involved with you.

[girl68]

Yeah, he likes you but I suggest you DO NOT DO IT. It's almost certain to fail and when it does shit is going to explode in your face. There are enough smart, sweet, younger, non-heads-of-departments who are available and since you're such a great catch- you shouldn't have a problem in the world finding one...

[Crystal99]

Well, I know many would advise against it, but I am willing to go ahead with it regardless. I just need some advice since I am not very experienced in dating-grew up in a religious and strict household and only had one bf. Are the things that I did showing interest to him? Would a guy take it as flirting?
and, what else should I do to show my interest?

thank you:-0

[WICKED THOUGHTS]

Eh, more body contact and lots of smiles and googly eyes. Make him see how u light up when his in ur presence. Just make sure u know what ur getting into ya? Kk good luck.

[girl68]

Think about the rep you'll get too... it won't be a good one.

[Crystal99]

I don't think it was a problem for John Nash and his wife LOL I am graduating this semester anyway.

[girl68]

You don't quite get it. You will still be "the girl WHO... "

Not to mention HIS rapport with his collegues. Think clearly and think hard- is persuing a guy who likes you REALLY worth everything that might come of this?

[Crystal99]

No, I get what you are saying. But, why do I ahve to be the girl WHO...screwed him??? I am leaving the school and starting work-so does it really matter? Will I ever see these people again? No. My question was not "should I go for it?"

I want to know some "male opinions" on the topic pertaining to the questions that I asked. Female's opinions on how to flirt better would help too. I would appreciate some advice on how to go about what I want to do. Why does it have to be a sexual thing anyway? We have so much in common-similar cultures, family values, interests in sports. I know I am young but we talk about travel, our favorite operas-Rigoletto, Il Trovatore for example. We talk about our favorite authors. So it is not like he just sees me as 'the girl WHO would..." If it works out it does, if not, oh well. Oh, and I am not planning on sleeping on him for a while if we go out.

[YouAreBeautiful]

Crystal it sounds like you have a great head on your shoulders. I would definitely recommend not taking it to far with him phyiscally for a while. His flirtation with you sounds pretty obvious to me and he sounds a little too smooth making me think he has some experience with younger women. How would you feel about him if yo ufound out he had had this kind of relationship with other college students or had to worry about that possibility in the future? Just be on your guard, I don't want to make accusations but just want to make sure you are aware of this possibilities. It sounds like the two of you have a lot in common so it may just be that the connection stems purely from having so much in common. Do you attend a religious university?

[VincenzoG91]

It's possible that this guy has a new "Crystal" every school year.

[LailaK]

Why are some women so eager to throw away professionalism for some d*ck from a guy who may or may not give a sh*t about them?

I don't understand this.

If what you really want is a relationship with this dude I suggest you wait until you are out of school and out of that job before you mess around. It a good way to judge if he's serious and it's a good way to keep your dignity.

I wouldn't care if Brad Pitt was my boss. I would never want anyone to ever think I was anything close to an office slut.

[Crystal99]

Hi all. I have not been keeping you updated for days-work was so crazy this week and so were my midterms. So, I am finishing up in just a few weeks and I wont be "his student" anymore. THis week I don't know what happened? I left him another bag of coffee but he never said anything about it-this discouraged me. Is it a bad sign? I know that he had tons of meetings at the university this week and was super busy-could that be it? I didn't get much of a chance to chitchat, except for yesterday where I told him briefly after asking a school related question that I made delicious fruit tartlets (I know from someone else that he loves them) and he said, "you didnt' bring me any?" So I said that I would make some for the psychology club party next Wednesday and told him I would bring him some. He seemed very happy. Other than that just a few smiles passing me in the department.
Does it look like something has gone wrong?

[Crystal99]

I don't know what happened to my edited comment but I meant to add that I would appreciate it if we did not assume that this guy is bad without knowing him. He seems very family-oriented and has a good personality. Also, comments such as 'throw away professionalism for d**k from a guy who doesn't care about them" makes it sound like I am some tramp. Please leave the social stigmas of the majority of today's young woman out of this. I take months to sleep with a man and first establish a friendship. So I would never be an office slut. Sorry LailaK but I am not looking to 'mess around."

I don't think he has a new "crystal" every year either. An older woman was chatting with some other coworkers and I overheard them saying, "he needs to find a nice girl, If my niece didn't live in Ohio, I would have set them up. He is such a good-hearted man." So, this made me think that he does have good qualities.

Anyway, I want you to tell me what you think of this weeks update-I feel like something has gone wrong, or I am just paranoid.

Do you think bringing the tartlets is ok?

[vashti]

Maybe someone else has noticed your flirtations and has spoken to him about how this relationship could jeopardize his career? Or maybe he was smart enough to think of this on his own.

You DO realize (I hope) that he could be jeopardizing his career over this, should he decide to pursue it further, don't you? A smart man wouldn't bother. It's very hard to establish a good professional reputation.