Need some help/advise about this girl I like.

[Drax]

Hello comunity members,

I need some help with this girl I really like.. I want some opnions on what I should do.
Should I try to forget her(really hard), should i try to date her? (hard too)

First of all, I am sorry about my grammar, but I will try be clear on what happend.

I am in my 3rd semester in college. In the first semester, I met this girl, but i didnt really care about her.
On my 2nd semester, we sort of became friends because I am firends with her friends. There was this day, I was sitting next to her on the floor, just fooling around, waiting for the next class, and we began to chat, I guess that, in that moment, i felt for her.
She is "diferent" and thats what I like about her. She likes anime and behaves as if she was a anime charcter. Everyone says she is nuts and even makes jokes about that, but in a harmless way that everyone ends up laughting.

Well.. I tryied to show her my interest for 6 months, but she is so nuts that she didnt really understood the "signs" i gave her.

I have this female friend that knows her, and she is helping me ever since, providing me info like if she was single, and stuff like that.

As the time passed I keept trying to make her notice my feelings, but I noticed that I had to be more "clear", so i TOLD her about that.

She told me she didnt believe me. I was like WTH??? The reason for that is that I am like the funny guy from our" group", I make fun with everyone, and I like to make everybody laught.

She also said that her boyfriend betrayed her, and that she cant trust any men.

So I expent like 6 more months trying to get her confidence, and this one time I asked her about what happend in the past, she told me that NOW she sees that i like her. And only that, she didnt say anything like, "but I am only your friend", so I was like"what should I do now?".

From that time on, I am trying to forget her, but we see each other everyday, her friends are my friends too, so we end up talking and interacting everytime, and whenever I see some guy flirting with her, I fell SO bad, and I really mean it.

So.. please help me. What should I do?
I think I do love her, but I dont know if I should keep pushing, or maybe just give up.

[cmacattack1]

Relationships aren't based on pushing. You can't change how somebody feels and I don't think continuing to pursue her until she gives in is a very healthy way to start things, is it?

So she had a bad relationship and she can't trust men. I feel bad for her, in all honesty. She is just wallowing in self pity and not letting anybody in and it's gotta be a pretty lonely existence. You shouldn't have to be punished because of that. I understand that it takes a long time for some people to become ready for relationships but you don't need to prove anything to her. If she doesn't like you for you, and doesn't believe in what you can provide for her after knowing you for this long a time, what makes you think she will at all?

I would be willing to bet anything that if the right guy came along and just completely floored her, she wouldn't be giving this "I don't trust men" excuse. You might not be that right guy, or might just be a bad time for you to pursue her, but either way it doesn't end happily ever after between you two. If you are able to be good friends with her, by all means, do so. But if you are hurting and can't be around her when she is with other guys, you need to put some distance between you and her so you can get your head on straight. Maybe easier said than done since you guys all have the same friends and go to same school, but you have to think about yourself in this.

[Drax]

I considered changing my classes period so I would not see her anymore, but I realized it was not worth it, losing all my school friends and changing all my routine for that.
I kinda see your point, I guess she doesn't like me the same way I like her. I guess I am feeling that way because she was the first girl that I really thought i had a chance.(I am 19 and I never ever dated, or even kissed, I know I am a failure, I think about that every freaking day, but its not my fault..)
Anyway thanks for showing your opinion.

[originalsince85]

that sux bro. sounds like your well an truly in the friend zone and theres not really any getting out of it. totally sucks that you have to see her everyday too!!

arent there other cute chicks you could hit on? confidence often builds with age, sometimes you just gotta suck it up and just go for something....you will only gain by experience and if something doesnt work out, what the hell...it will be experience under your belt for next time. im even talking about asking a (different) cute girl out on a date in reference to your never dated comment.

i dont think im the best looking of guys, or the funniest, definitely not the smartest, but the only reason i'm with the girl of my dreams right now is because i just had the balls to go up to her and say hi!! and trust me, took a lot of balls, and i knew there was a high chance of getting turned down...

what im saying is, you need to start putting your focus and efforts elsewhere and your at a great age for doing so! especially at college, there must be tons of chicks! and plenty of opportunities.

meh. just a thought anyway...

[Drax]

You are completly right, but the problem is, i really don't know how.
This girl I talked about happend to be friends of some of my friends, so it was easy to start talking to her, but I have no idea how to talk to other girls that I have no contact.
BUT... if I have ANY chance to talk to other girls, even if they are just asking about the class or whatever, I will definetly try something up.
I also am not the smartest nor the best good looking, but I know I have my good qualities, and I am gonna use them xD.

Thanks everyone, reading your posts really cheers me up.

[originalsince85]

totally bro, you gotta use what youve got! theres plenty of help on the net about how to talk to women etc, and you could use this forum for tips and to ask questions people are generally quite helpful!!!

keep us posted!

[Drax]

For updating purposes....

Remember I said that she told me that she coudnt believe any guy and all that crap? She is hitting on a guy that is new to college, and he doesnt even give a damn about her.
So... she said that crap to me and now she goes after that douche. When my female friend told me that, I felt SO angry, and I mean ANGRY, like bitting off my arm or whatever.
How could she do that? And again, a while ago, I was waiting for my teacher with some friends on the corridor. She arrived, "kissed hello" my friend(thats normal, every girl does that), and when she got to me she kissed me on the cheek and HUGGED me(believe it or not, that means a lot more then a kiss), and I was like "WHAT/WHY"... She is so twisted.

This thursday, me and 2 friends stayed later on college to watch some chicks. We hanged out and just watched, he said it was gonna help me forget her, but he doesnt even know I have no idea about what to do to get to know a girl.... So lame.

Also, I have been thinking of her like every single damn time, I even dreamt with her, and I dream like once per month ¬¬ (such a waste)

Well, this is my "keeping you guys posted".

[xxazurexx]

Remember I said that she told me that she coudnt believe any guy and all that crap? She is hitting on a guy that is new to college, and he doesnt even give a damn about her....

Honestly, if you like someone and have made an interest known and you get some reason in the form of:

1. I don't want a relationship right now.
2. I'm not interested in a relationship.
3. I've been hurt too much
4. I have things going on in my life/don't have time for a relationship....

Then it is a load of COCK AND BULL!!

They are not interested in you in 'that' way.....hence is why they give excuses.

People usually say what they mean, or they will use 'nice' ways of saying what they mean, hoping you latch on to the true meaning. They don't say it to keep you guessing, nor are they playing hard to get - they say it hoping you get the message and you will leave them alone.

And if you continue to stick around and after someone has turned you down, then bigger fool you I say.

[xxazurexx]

I would be willing to bet anything that if the right guy came along and just completely floored her, she wouldn't be giving this "I don't trust men" excuse.

No she wouldn't, because we don't....

Men we aren't interested in, get the excuses - men we are interested in, don't get excuses.

I'm pretty sure it works the same way for men too. They will make excuses to a woman and if the man doesn't her see her 'that' way.

[cmacattack1]

No she wouldn't, because we don't....

Men we aren't interested in, get the excuses - men we are interested in, don't get excuses.

I'm pretty sure it works the same way for men too. They will make excuses to a woman and if the man doesn't her see her 'that' way.

100 percent works both ways!

[Drax]

I know it's been a long time, but I just felt like coming back for a update.

There is been like 6 months since my last post. At that time, I decided to try to keep my distance from her, and eventually overcome what I felt for her. But for some reason, maybe destiny, I don't know, things went quite the other way.

We bonded together really tight. I always kept away from the "friends zone" so I was kinda something different to her, like a really nice friend that she knows that fells something for her.

Anyways, right now I am extremely confused. In my mind, she thought of me as a friend, BUT in the past months I tried something really bold and it worked. I was sitting behind her at some class and her hair was in my table, so I started felling it with my hand and she liked it. From there on I was doing it every now and then.

After that, I started to fell her head and her back/shoulder/neck with my hand, and she loves it. The weird thing is that, I can notice she likes it. She closes her eyes, relax her muscles and sometimes she breathes out like "oohhh I love this". But she is REALLY shy. Whenever I talk to her while doing that, she cant look me straight, and her face is all red.

Last class I did one more step and asked her if she wanted a massage. She said yes, and I had the greatest time of my like!

On my first post I said:

She told me she didn't believe me. I was like WTH???

What I forgot to say was that, she said something like " how can you fell that way? we just started talking for like a month", something like that. So I think she really had doubts over my feeling.

What I am trying to say is: Since that day, we got closer, and I feel like I may have a chance this time. I showed her that I care for her, we enjoy each other company (I enjoy mare than her, but that's not the point.)....So I think I should talk to her again.

I wanted to know your opinions, any thoughts, ideas, tips are welcomed.

Sorry for the huge post.

[Agape]

Well if things are going well then continue with it . . . so what's the situation right now? have you dated at all?

[Drax]

No *Saddest face EVER*

[Drax]

I am gonna see her this Wednesday. Any thoughts/ideas are very appreciated.