Hi,
I'm at my wits end and don't know what to do. I searched the web for info and ended up here. Can someone help?
Here goes: I was married for 22 years, with him for 25. 3 yrs ago my ex out of the blue asked me for a divorce. I hadn't a clue. We were best friends, we were soal mates. So I thought. Ended up he was having and affar. Looonng story. Anyway for 2 years, (he would not file for divorce, just moved out to be with his whore) I tried everything in my power and thensome to save my marriage. I took it extremely hard and put myself, and my girls through way more than I should have. I should have divorced the SOB right away and saved us all alot of grieve. Anyway, I've been divorced now for 2 years. A little over a year ago something weird happend. A very sweet man that I've worked with for a long time, and I started seeing each other. I don't know how it happened neither does he, it's just we ended up talking one night and the rest is history.
He is so different than my ex. He's kind and sweet and funny. He would do anything for me and my daughter. I can trust him 100%. He tells me all of the time how wonderful I am, how beautiful, how sexy. (something I've NEVER had). He's gentle and pure, he's never mean. Sounds like the perfect man huh?
Then the bad. He works ALL the time. He farms and works full time. He drinks WAY too much. He hates inside dogs, he doesn't like to dance, he doesn't like camping, you hardly can get him away from home, he thinks flowers and plants are a waste of time and money, all the things I love about life. Or that have always been important to me.
And then the sex. He has a hard time getting aroused. He's quick on the gun. And last night, we both had a few, I was feeling adventurous and so was he, we foreplayed then I gave him oral, he finished, I was left unsatisfied. We never even got to sex. I was angry. Feeling used and unrespected. Like I didn't matter. I went to sleep and he knew I was upset. He asked if I was mad I said yes, he said fine and rolled over and went to sleep. This morning he stayed in bed a lot longer than normal. He got up and groweled at me because my dog was laying on my blanket. I had it and got my stuff around to go home. He asked me where I was going I told him home. I went into the other room and sat down. I wanted him to come talk to me. He didn't then he went to the basement to shower so I left.
I really don't know if I should keep on trying to make this relationship work. Or should I just give up. It could be so much worse I know that, my marriage was. But will I be happy with this man?