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Thread: ex and the olive branch

  1. #1
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    ex and the olive branch

    I recently broke up with my bf of 6months partly because he cancelled really close to the time and so couldnt come to my sisters wedding due to sports match (which I was really upset about and told him that I felt he chose the match over me but all he said to this was well im sorry you feel that way) but also beacuse I recently started a new college course and the workload is really busy so there were a few times when I couldn't meet or go out with him because of work to do so I thought maybe a break form the relationship was the right thing. He is truly a nice guy,someone I felt a real connection with and got on so well with.

    After I broke up with him and ever since I've been in bits - really upset and almost questioning my decision to have ended it.

    I recently texted him just to say hi and that and we text for a bit but in one message he said that he missed me. So in reply I told him that I missed him too and the last few weeks have been really tough without him - to which he replied well when you make a decision you must face the consequences of your actions.

    I was totally stunned by this, to start with he said first he missed me and then when I had the same sentiments all he said as good as was well thats your own fault.

    What would you think of this situation? I do really and truly miss him and I thought maybe by both of us sending out the olive branch that may have helped but he doesn't seem to think the same given his reaction or am I worong in saying this?? What would you think of this situation and would do you think I should do if anything?

  2. #2
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    Well, he's right, but it was kind of a crappy thing to say. I mean, you did say you wanted a break, so that's what you're getting. You should probably continue with the break - you did it for whatever reason you thought was good enough, and your situation probably isn't any different now than it was then. It's not really fair to dump him when things get rough and then pick him back up again just because you miss him.

  3. #3
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    "...he said first he missed me and then when I had the same sentiments all he said as good as was well thats your own fault..."

    Well, yea. If you broke his heart and then started talking with him about feelings, you need to be prepared to be on the receiving end of some resentment.

    That was either his way of trying to keep you at arms length so he doesn't get hurt more. Or it was him asking for a bigger olive branch on your part.

    To be honest, I don't really see your olive branch there. Your intention may have been to offer one, but it was a bit hidden from him. He heard:
    "Here's how *I* feel, please listen to *me* so *I* can feel better."

    So, he said:
    "Well thanks a lot for thinking of me first (not!). You know, you really hurt me."

    If that was the end of the conversation, your silence on the matter may have then been interpreted as being unsympathetic or ungrateful.

    -PP

  4. #4
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    He was right. You had every right to break up with him, but you do have to live with how you feel afterwards.

  5. #5
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    Payback is a bitch But, hey its not d end of d world. Im sure his venting and miss u too. goodluck

  6. #6
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    "I recently broke up with my bf of 6months" . . .6 months, that's alll? and remember you broke up with him.

    "I told him that I missed him too and the last few weeks have been really tough without him - to which he replied well when you make a decision you must face the consequences of your actions." . . . true, seems like he's moving on?
    You post, you ask questions, you give facts --> I reply, I give quotations, I have opinions

  7. #7
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    He sounds hurt and mad about being 'let go'.

    I had an exGF who chased me down for three months via email, txt and phone call after I left her. I finally responded and we tried to work it out. That's another story.

    My point is, she felt strongly about me to remain in contact through I was ignoring her. Her feelings for me were pretty strong to try for three months. So, do you feel that way about this person. Because flattery could win him back.

    Quote Originally Posted by chocaholic101 View Post
    What would you think of this situation? I do really and truly miss him and I thought maybe by both of us sending out the olive branch that may have helped but he doesn't seem to think the same given his reaction or am I worong in saying this?? What would you think of this situation and would do you think I should do if anything?
    Last edited by SealedWithAKISS; 21-10-10 at 04:42 AM.
    We learn about ourselves in relationship with others.

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