why are people turned of by people with mental; health problems?????

[gollom555]

why are people turned of by people with mental; health problems?????
i have mental health problems and if u knew me u would not think i have but i have. why are people put off by this???

[RdHrshyKss]

because people are lazy and ignorant and would much rather find someone without mental health problems than to deal with the extra effort that would need to go into a relationship with a person with mental health problems.

[gollom555]

thanks for the reply. but most people with mental health problems are as normal as anyone. not one of my friends realised i had mental health problems. i dont see why they cant see we are normal. we dont need much more effort than normal tbh.
thank you x

[Poetic_Partner]

RHK,

I agree with your assessment. Think of it this way though - early on, the other person does not know you yet. Personally, it doesn't bother me, but I can understand how someone does not want to get involved casually with someone who may need a lot of help. the last thing someone on a first date wants to hear is "If I pass out here's what you need to tell the EMS."

Mental health issues also come with a perception that a degree of drama may be around the corner.

Again, I don't really agree with this, but I comprehend it.

-PP

[gollom555]

i have anxiety and depression so im not going to pass out and stuff. i might have a down day but that would be it and would not take muh to cheer up just a hug would cheer me up. people with mental health problems like mine just want to feel loved or feel like they belong but people dont understand and alot think we are dangerous
thanks x

[Boisdevie]

most of us have down days from time to time. And feeling loved, feeling that there is someone there for us makes those down days fewer. Good luck.

[YouAreBeautiful]

Gollum to keep the answer simple, it scares people. A flock of white sheep will be skeptical of the black sheep initially. The reindeer were skeptical of Rudolph until Santa gave him the first position on the sleigh. Pardon my humor. It takes people a little time to warm up to those who are different. I wish this weren't the case, but it is.

[gollom555]

thank you for your comments. i just wish people would understand more. i know it seems a wierd thing to say but people need to learn and understand others before judging. and i would like to say people should not judge people if they have problems. they should judge them on how they are as it should not matter what problems people have. ive had a few girlfriends and i told them after a year of goin out with em i had anxiety and depression and they all finished me next day of me saying it altho they loved me ive had 2 of my exs wish they never did it and the recent one only finished me 2 months ago and she regretted it aswell. but because i had problems they finished it.
thanks for replying
xx

[RdHrshyKss]

i deal with depression and anxiety as well, and i've realized how much of an impact it really does have on a relationship. to say that mental health problems are insignificant is false. it does take some extra effort on the other person's behalf to deal with some of the symptoms of their partner's depression/anxiety. i'm not saying that you are like me in any way, because everyone is different and has gone through different experiences to make them who they are. if a hug is all you need, then you're lucky. i'm a bit more complex than that. but it is definitely true that there is a negative stigma associated with mental health issues.

i personally don't think it's necessary to relinquish that information about yourself until you can fully trust the other person and have given enough time for the person to realize that your mental health really isn't an issue, that you have it under control and they have nothing to worry about. i wouldn't go around advertising it.

[BrownDog52469]

I have OCD. Due to the current circumstances within my marriage I am suffering from a deep depression as well. Presently I am taking enough antidepressants to put a smile on a Rhinoscerous. lol There is certainly a stigma attached to mental health issues. Mental problems are a matter of degree, however. Everyone has them, its just a matter of how much they are affecting your life or not. People with depression, OCD, ect. are generally very inteligent and caring people. In my opinion, the people that recognize the problem and seek treatment are much more inteligent and concerned about the quality of their life and those around them than those who choose to remain ignorant. I myself generally choose not to reveal my problems to most people. Those I do reveal my issues to usually know me well enough by then that their opinions are already formed and won't be affected by it.

[RdHrshyKss]

thank you for your comments. i just wish people would understand more. i know it seems a wierd thing to say but people need to learn and understand others before judging. and i would like to say people should not judge people if they have problems. they should judge them on how they are as it should not matter what problems people have. ive had a few girlfriends and i told them after a year of goin out with em i had anxiety and depression and they all finished me next day of me saying it altho they loved me ive had 2 of my exs wish they never did it and the recent one only finished me 2 months ago and she regretted it aswell. but because i had problems they finished it.
thanks for replying
xx

i would say that the girls you dated are a bit too superficial and you are probably better off without them. if you were with them long enough for them to realize that your mental health was under control and they still decided to end the relationship, then they aren't worth your time anyway. i know it might dig away a bit at your self-esteem, but stay strong and you will soon enough find someone who will accept you for who you are...isn't that what we are all looking for anyway?

i agree that people are ignorant and uneducated about these types of issues and their first instinct is to flee rather than to be open-minded and learn. but that's how you weed through the ones that aren't worth your time. i have to deal with the same crap...it takes a lot of patience, but just think positive. maybe you are better off with someone who has a similar issue as you do and can respect and understand what you deal with.

[gollom555]

thank you for this comment. im sorry about your stress. i have depression and anxiety. ive been suffering with it for a while. i have tried telling people i have it and not telling people i have it and it does not seem to work. i am on 2 different types of anti depressants and am currently trying to get on the list for cognative behavioural therapy (CBT). thank you for the comment.
x
p.s any advice anyone could give would be appreciated as im having problems finding people
thanks

[gollom555]

thank you. i never thought about it that way. thanks. x

[Fade to black]

I'm in a similiar boat, it's anxiety I suffer from which can lead to bouts of depression.

I was with someone for twelve years and they lived through it with me, my first bout was around two years in to the relationship, so they understood it and accepted it as part of me. I've just started dating someone new, when is the right time to tell them? Well if things work out for us I won't be telling her for a while yet.

Hopefully I may never need to, I'm on Citalopram and have been for some time, I'm also attending CBT and have been referred to a Clinical Psychologist so have hope that with the help and support I am recieving I can put it behind me and lead a "normal" life.

[RdHrshyKss]

i wish you both the best of luck. i haven't gone on any medication and i'm still having issues getting off my ass and going for some professional help. in the next 6 months i will be moving back home and am looking at it as an opportunity to start fresh and take charge of my life. i personally would like to avoid taking any medication. i have the belief that medication just hides the symptoms, and that real therapy is the only way to get at the root of the problem...now if i can only build up the motivation to actual get therapy i'll be a lot better off.