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Thread: Getting over someone you work with 5 nights a week?

  1. #1
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    Getting over someone you work with 5 nights a week?

    It's a very long story. Nothing happened between us but the feelings were there. Really like the girl but it's just been so up and down and head wrecking etc. She's back with her ex now and I'm feeling kinda hurt.

    How do ya get over someone you have to see everyday?
    It would be fine if I didn't have to work with her. I'd just delete on facebook and she'd be forgotten about in no time but that's not the case now.

    Leaving my job isn't an option althought I would love to.

    Any help is greatly appreciated


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    Being with her ex means nothing, you can still go after her... it's not like they're married. If she likes you the way you think she does then it should be pretty easy to get something happening.

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    Thanks for the reply! Here's the jist of what happened:

    [url]http://www.loveforum.net/ask-female-forum/46010-dont-know-what-do-girl.html[/url]

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    sometimes even working does not help

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    Firstly, NOTHING happened between you . . . so you aren't even getting over her really, you are getting over a fantasy. . . time to wake up from a dream and focus on reality - I'd suggest hobbies and creative activities to keep your mind occupied.

    Spending time with real people helps too, friends and family.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Agape View Post
    Firstly, NOTHING happened between you . . . so you aren't even getting over her really, you are getting over a fantasy. . . time to wake up from a dream and focus on reality - I'd suggest hobbies and creative activities to keep your mind occupied.

    Spending time with real people helps too, friends and family.
    What I mean is, what can I do to stop thinking about that person so much?

    The feelings I have are that of jealousy/regret/anger/sadness...best way I can describe it really.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MadMardegan View Post
    What I mean is, what can I do to stop thinking about that person so much?

    The feelings I have are that of jealousy/regret/anger/sadness...best way I can describe it really.
    Jealously means you fear of losing something you had . . you getting back to reality, so you are only losing the fantasy
    Regret - how so? . . . regret thinking about her? regret your inaction?
    Anger - directed at who? . . . yourself, her, the reality of the situation?
    Sadness, very understandable . . . hopes didn't live up.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Agape View Post
    Jealously means you fear of losing something you had . . you getting back to reality, so you are only losing the fantasy
    Regret - how so? . . . regret thinking about her? regret your inaction?
    Anger - directed at who? . . . yourself, her, the reality of the situation?
    Sadness, very understandable . . . hopes didn't live up.
    I found out tonight that nearly everything she ever said to me was a lie. All of it. I'm really pissed off but I'm hurting to be honest.

    Jealousy might not be the best word but something along those lines. Jealous that she's talking to other people like she used to talk to me but isn't talking to me like that anymore...if that makes sense.
    Regret that it didn't work out like it seemed it would. Regret that I could've done things different, regret that I had to work so much which haulted us seeing each other.
    Anger directed at myself and her. Her because of what she's done to me, how she's made me feel. It's almost like she's done it on purpose. Also at myself because even after all this shit I still like the girl and can't stop thinking of her.
    Sadness is kind of self explanitory.

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    Sorry to hear that :-( I hope you meet someone who is perfect for you, loves you, and treats you with respect.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MadMardegan View Post
    I found out tonight that nearly everything she ever said to me was a lie. All of it. I'm really pissed off but I'm hurting to be honest.

    Jealousy might not be the best word but something along those lines. Jealous that she's talking to other people like she used to talk to me but isn't talking to me like that anymore...if that makes sense.
    Regret that it didn't work out like it seemed it would. Regret that I could've done things different, regret that I had to work so much which haulted us seeing each other.
    Anger directed at myself and her. Her because of what she's done to me, how she's made me feel. It's almost like she's done it on purpose. Also at myself because even after all this shit I still like the girl and can't stop thinking of her.
    Sadness is kind of self explanitory.
    Congrats, you are experiencing what they call being heart broken. It's a good pain though, it's a pain that really makes you feel human. I will include the obligatory, she's not good enough for you. Anyways, you're going to have these feelings again, and guess what? You're going to know how to deal with them this time! You now have experience and can make use of this experience to your benefit.

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    When I went home last night I put some stupid shit on facebook. She asked me about it.

    I wanted to tell her it was about her but decided it was better if I didn't.

    We ended up talking. Talked about her boyfriend, her past etc. She then told me again "you're a really great guy, I do like you, I wish things were different". I went home pissed off about her and ended being a friend for her to talk to. Felt weird.

    What she told me wasn't savoury to say the least but whatever.

    Judge people by their actions and not their words though, right?

    Onwards and upwards, all day every day!

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    Don't "put some stupid shit on facebook"

    And although you knew it was better you didn't talk to her . . . you ended up talking . . . why?

    Now your actions aren't conforming to what you want. . . cut off communication.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Agape View Post
    Don't "put some stupid shit on facebook"

    And although you knew it was better you didn't talk to her . . . you ended up talking . . . why?

    Now your actions aren't conforming to what you want. . . cut off communication.
    Well that's the thing man, I don't want to cut off communication.

    I really do want to be friends with this girl, regardless of the situation.

    I probably sound like an idiot but that's how I feel. I don't want to not talk with her.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MadMardegan View Post
    Well that's the thing man, I don't want to cut off communication.

    I really do want to be friends with this girl, regardless of the situation.

    I probably sound like an idiot but that's how I feel. I don't want to not talk with her.
    You're not an idiot because you still want to have a friendship with that person. I'm still friends with all my ex boyfriends. This girl is nuts because you seem to be such a nice, caring person who wanted nothing but to enjoy her company and get to know her better outside of work. Her loss, if you ask me. As for keeping a friendship, it's truly up to her. I'd keep treating her how you had been treating her just as friends while you work. Be aware, though, that your feelings might get in the way while you're trying to transform from "liking her" mode to "friendship" mode. So when that happens, have the strength to bite your tongue and realize it is what it is. But if she keeps treating you like shit while you're only trying to be a friend, then cut her loose. She isn't worth your time.

    Good luck... I hope all works well for you.

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    The easiest way to get over someone is to get under someone else.

    Seriously. Go find yourself a new love. You'll forget all about this one.
    God, so atrocious in the Old Testament, so attractive in the New--the Jekyl and Hyde of sacred romance.
    -Mark Twain

    If people are good only because they fear punishment and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.
    -Albert Einstein

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