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Thread: Dating for 4 months and haven't even made out. WTH.

  1. #1
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    Dating for 4 months and haven't even made out. WTH.

    I know everyone goes at their own pace, but I can't help but feel like this is abnormal. I'm 18, and he's 19. We entered our relationship with basically no experience. What I'm saying is that neither of us has made out yet. Despite that, I was hoping it would be something that would just come naturally... but man, I feel like this is taking forever.

    I don't want to cause any trouble, but should I confront him about this? Or should I just grow some balls and initiate the making out?

    Don't get me wrong, I really do love him. I just want to go further, then yet I don't want to pressure him... then yet I feel like this is taking way too long.

    Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks a lot!

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    Initiate stuff - what do you have to lose? Perhaps he's a bit shy/scared.

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    This isn't dating. This is friendship... Either he sees you as just a friend or he is extremely shy. Like most guys he would probably love if you initiated. I dont see what there is to lose. In fact, you might lose something by NOT making out with him if he interprets it as a lack of physical interest/attraction. Personally I dont even go on more than 2 dates without some kind of a kiss - because if I kiss and end up not liking the kiss (it felt cold, gross, or uninteresting), then I wasted all that time. There is actually a whole subconscious chemical analyzation and mate determination process that goes on when you kiss and most of the time if you kiss any given person you will not enjoy it 100% - so its not a good idea (time investment wise) to wait too long.

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    I totally know how you are feeling. My first boyfriend and I took 2 weeks to have our 1st kiss and then we dated for 3 months and we never made out. I don't think it has anything to do with the fact that he doesn't love you or anything and that he is just shy about it. Sometimes guys also need that little push to get things going. So I would say just go for it and if it feels awkward or isn't ready, just be honest and tell him that you thought u'd give it a shot and that you'll wait til hes ready. You both are actually at a good advantage with having the same amount of experience because there is no pressure and you both can learn and go through the same experience together. It feels like you have a better connection or atleast thats what I would think.

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    Wait so you two agreed that you're a couple but after that... nothing?
    To answer you question, yes! Initiate making out, perhaps he's just afraid he'll scare you away. Perhaps he has bigger problems. What ever it is it's better to find out sooner then later, no?
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  6. #6
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    My EX was the same, luckily for me here, we could go out and get drunk at 18 and 19, this gave her some dutch courage i'd imagine.

    You just have to make the move yourself, it'll be on his mind too remember, and the longer it goes on the worse it will become.

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    Just go for it. What do you have to lose?

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    eh, go to a movie, put on some sweet smelling lip gloss, lean on his shoulder/neck and stare at him and his lips. Umm ummm he should get the hint

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by jessyvii View Post
    I know everyone goes at their own pace, but I can't help but feel like this is abnormal. I'm 18, and he's 19. We entered our relationship with basically no experience. 1) What I'm saying is that neither of us has made out yet. Despite that, I was hoping it would be something that would just come naturally... but man, I feel like this is taking forever. (/1)

    2) I don't want to cause any trouble, but should I confront him about this? Or should I just grow some balls and initiate the making out?

    Don't get me wrong, I really do love him. I just want to go further, 3 then yet I don't want to pressure him... then yet I feel like this is taking way too long. (/3)

    Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks a lot!
    1) No making out in 4 months? . . . sounds like close friendship . . . if something were to happen the tension would have made it happen

    2) Don't 'confront' him but do 'initiate' something and judge his reaction . . take it slow and built things up gradually, you should have been doing this for the last 4 months.

    3) If neither of you does anything it's only going to take longer . . . good luck.

  10. #10
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    Why take it slow? If I remember me at that age I was full of raging hormones. If he hasn't tried to **** you by now I'd be seriously worried. At that age two dates was long enough before things got serious. Not 4 bloody months. Young people today!

  11. #11
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    yeah i gotta agree with people here.. if you go more then 2 dates without making out, thats pretty shocking.. but oh well so be it. As others have said, just go for it!

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    take it slow.. don't be in a hurry..
    Relationships Breakups

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    Take the risk, he'll have to grow balls to kiss you, if you really do mean so much to him =)

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