I really really need help. :(

[ConfusedGuy87]

Hey everyone, just for starters. Im 23 and this is my 1st real relationship. Ive been going out with this girl 2 months today but ive known her since last october. Back in the year we wer texting every day, kissed a few times, shared the same bed, met up and everything, no sex tho. Then with all this going on for nearly a year i asked her to make it official. See, when we met she had told me she dosent do relationships and had 1 boyfriend before. I still asked her and now we are going out.

We live an hour apart, which isnt too bad, just a short bus trip but it still hurts when i cant see her al the time. Lately ive been getting the feeling shes getting bored with me due to the general lack of interest in relationships. Wer kissing, sex and announced to our friends its public etc. It was all great until one day she said she loved me and then backed up and said, well, i dont, but ya know what i mean. I said it back. That was ok. Now she is txting my friend flat out all the time, i know they 100% wouldnt cheat over me and she is ADIMENT he is her new best friend from my town and dosent see him in any other way. Thats kinda annoying me, but then, in the past few days when i txt her it takes like 2 hrs to reply and stuff. We usewd to txt nite to eachother and she once jokingly demanded that i keep it up as she loved it, now she dosent reply when i do anymore and dosent start conversations with me anymore either over txt. I feel like im annoying her now. She has alot of male admirers and i know im not the best she can have, i brought this up before but she said to give myself more credit and she is still into me.

Am i reading things wrong? Should i be worried? We only get to meet at the weekends and if thats not possible it ends up being a forthnight. I stuck guys, i need advice. I cant stop thinking about what if im doing something wrong, what if she breaks up with me...

Thanks guys.

[justcheckin]

dude first of all, "**** THAT" if she is txting your friend. I don't care if it is your wife, or your best friend, that is 100% completely unacceptable in any relationship. Once or twice is fine, but if she is talking ot him more then you..... do I really have to spell it out for you?

You should simply not say a single word to her. Ignore her. Dont txt her or call her UNTIL she starts to txt or call you... and when she does.... dont reply for 2 hours. You GOT TO PLAY THE GAME. she probably is bored because you are at her beck and call 24/7. while it is flattering at first, girls will start to not like it very much as the relationship progress because no girl likes a guy that is openly begging at their feet. I swear to god man, you start to ignore her, and if she likes you at ALL, she will come back. But you have to actually IGNORE her for a little bit. That is the only way. I don't mean if she txts you, txt her back 10 min later, instead of immediately. I mean physically put the phone down and go do something else.

Heres a good tip:

if you guys are txting and you dont want it to look like you are actually on the other side of hte phone WAITING every second for her reply, when she does txt you back 20, 30, 50 min later... count how many min it actually was between txts. Figure out that number, and dont txt her back until that much time has elapsed. This keeps the conversation as active as she wants it without her even realizing it. Very good technique. You need to stop waiting around for her and you need to make her feel that need to tlak to you, and you will only be able to do that through ignoring her now.

[IncognitoSir]

Justcheckin........i like your style bro, but the whole game playing thing isn't going to work this time. This guy has a lot of feelings for this chick and nothing good relationship wise ever comes from playing games. To be honest, forget everything she says to you now, ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS! What she says now is pretty much irrelevant, but what she does will show you exactly what she means. IF she's blowing you off, not prioritizing you, ignoring you, and payying more attention to your bff than you, well.......that should show you a lot. Don't be a sucka man, I know you like here a lot and you've probably had some great times with her but you can do better man. This is not how relationships work and there is no reason for you to suffer thru her BS.

[ConfusedGuy87]

Thanks for the advice guys. I suppose that wouldnt be very attractive if i waited on her every move etc. Got on grand with her today, txt her for a bit but out of nowhere she txt me answering me and finished the text with thats it, we have nothing else to talk about. Confused,i replied: what? And she said exactly. So i said right, if u say so, txt u 2mo if i have something else to say...maybe. She replies: yea, hopefully :-/

WTF is going on with her. So annoying.

(by the way, my flag, its not that country, im irish)

[MerryH]

It was all great until one day she said she loved me and then backed up and said, well, i dont, but ya know what i mean.

she txt me answering me and finished the text with thats it, we have nothing else to talk about. Confused,i replied: what? And she said exactly. So i said right, if u say so, txt u 2mo if i have something else to say...maybe. She replies: yea, hopefully :-/

Wow, that is one cold girl. You are annoying the piss out of her, judging by that second quote. I don't know if that's your fault or not. Are you texting her with boring drivel while she's busy or something? Either way, she was kind of a bitch to you and obviously has a problem with you (apart from the fact that she doesn't love you.) Ask her why she's treating you like an annoying mosquito. Or don't. You'd probably be better off just breaking up with her. She doesn't sound that into you anymore.

[ConfusedGuy87]

Thanks, i see what u mean. She means love as in really like, not love. Its so stupid. And the only thing that is keeping me wanting this relationship is the fact it couldnt of changed so much in a week. This day last week we wer together at hers, she told me i was her favourite person she has met in aaaages and stuff like that, sleping together. Then i get this whole buzz about the relationship from tuesday onwards.

About the text thing, she fessed up that she was only joking and i need to chill. How can i? Or do i need to chill. Gawd...

Thanks for the replies...

[MadMardegan]

Where abouts you living man?

Seems like a sucky situation though man. I don't think this is the right girl to start a relationship with.

Imo, play the games and see how she reacts.

[IncognitoSir]

Thanks, i see what u mean. She means love as in really like, not love. Its so stupid. And the only thing that is keeping me wanting this relationship is the fact it couldnt of changed so much in a week. This day last week we wer together at hers, she told me i was her favourite person she has met in aaaages and stuff like that, sleping together. Then i get this whole buzz about the relationship from tuesday onwards.

About the text thing, she fessed up that she was only joking and i need to chill. How can i? Or do i need to chill. Gawd...

Thanks for the replies...

When this is all over, you'll finally realize she was toying with you all this time. How easy is it to say, "oh, i was just joking when i was being nasty to you for no reason with those texts"? WAKE UP!!!!! IF you are annoying her she should tell you thhis.....clearly you're not aware you're annoying her. It's not as complicated as you'de like to think it is man. She didn't know how to tell you how she feels about you, now she's being nasty to you because she's emotionally confused. Either way you slice it though, you'll get it in the end. It's up to you how you want to face reality though.

[justcheckin]

you guys talk on the phone or just txt? That sounds to me like she is about to call it a day with your relationship...

[ConfusedGuy87]

Thanks for the replies guys. We txt and talk onthe phone. Burt since last week its slowed waaaaaaaaaaay down for no reason. She would just txt outta nowhere saying something shes doing, id do the same. I txt her before bed and she replies the odd time and for instance, 2day i wanted to take advice and wait. 3:30pm no txt...so i txt saying im gonna go give blood, pretty nervous even tho i shouldnt be. Then she replies good for u!

Thats it.

Confused.com

[Boisdevie]

Let me get this straight - you're a young guy, you shared a bed with a nice young woman and nothing happened? Are you crazy?

[justcheckin]

are you sure you guys are dating?? I talk more to some girls I just "know" more then that dude....

[ConfusedGuy87]

Yes, stuff has happened in bed since, but only when we made our relationship official.