I need a woman's perspective as I can't exactly relate to the situation or see the whole of it from her a female perspective. The short story: we met while on holiday, slept together, kept in touch, made plans, moved too fast, she broke it off, has essentially ignored me. Any interest in being friends eventually?
I met a French girl while on holiday and basically the situation went pear-shaped because I misunderstood the sentiments/words she expressed in French. We slept together on the second night--her last night in town--and it was incredibly intimate and intensely passionate for 5 hours. It was both physical and emotional sex. She wanted me to visit her the day after she left but I couldn't as I was with family. We spoke regularly for 2 weeks then she set off to travel and wasn't essentially out of contact for 5 weeks.
We were open in our conversations and spoke about our life's plans, what we want to do, etc, and her parent's divorce which had just begun, but never discussed our night together or what it was meant to be. I thought holiday romance from the off, but constantly misunderstanding the sentiment of her words in French, it seemed to be more serious, that real feelings were involved and still present. We had started to make plans for me to visit and then the whole thing unraveled shortly there after. She said she felt too much pressure and was afraid to disappointment or let me down. She also said the cliché 'it's not you it's me' and 'it's really not a good time for me right now.' We had a long conversation which was kind of a kiss-off--I wish the situation were different, but it's not kind of chat.
Here's where I'm lost. I'm not sure if she wanted me to forget about her and we go our separate ways or if she wanted to stay in contact as friends. I told her I'm moving to France next summer so friendship's not impossible or absurd. Either just before or just after our conversation she met a Spanish guy and she and a friend travelled with him and his brother for a while. I didn't realize this until muuuuuuuch later. Had I known, I could've avoided making a fool of myself.
Over the next few weeks she was without a computer or Internet so we hardly spoke, all the while she's spending time with the Spanish chap who she now properly fancies. Responding to my Facebook messages were not a priority, though she did get back to 2 I sent over 2 weeks. I tried to tell her I misunderstood what she had said in French and that we can slow down, take some steps back. Afterwards, she posted sad videos, songs, statuses about relationships and breakups. I didn't know about the Spaniard so I thought these were about me. I tried to tell her that I didn't mean to hurt her if I had. That I like her and everything's alright. She got back to me hours later and we've not really spoken since, which was 4 weeks ago.
The only contact we've had has been a tidy 'happy birthday' post on Facebook and a few days ago she 'liked' a photo I posted. I was kind of chuffed because I assumed she was fed up with me.
So what would you want me to do? Leave her alone entirely while she's interested in this Spanish chap? He lives in Spain though she's had to go back to France for a while to save up before she can move to Spain. I'm not sure if it's for him or because she's got friends there. Now that she's at home and kind of bored and away from him, I'm wondering if this is my chance to try to start talking again, leaving out any emotional relationship bollocks and focusing on just trying to be friends.
I'd like to be friends, though I'll admit that at the moment, I'd like to leave the possibility of something next year. If that's never going to happen, friends is fine. She's a cool girl. Do I continue to wait without any contact to see if she tries to contact me in anyway? Or am I but a distant memory now that she's interested in someone else who's far away? After my 'I'm sorry and I like you' message she removed me from her 'always shown' friends on Facebook. I know she did genuinely feel 'something' earlier.
It sounds silly I know, but I'm kind of in a bad way over this. I let myself get attached because I thought our feelings were going the same in direction. It has never been a problem with other 'flings' in the past, but there was never a language barrier.