The Secret Language of Women

[nerdy_guy]

The Secret Language of Women -- Keywords and Their Meaning

Fine

This is the word a woman uses at the end of any argument in which she

feels she is right about but needs to shut you up. Never use "fine" to

describe how a woman looks. This will cause you to have one of those

arguments.

Five Minutes

This is really half an hour. It is equivalent to the same "five minutes"

that a football game is going to last before you take out the garbage.

Nothing

This really means, "You'd never understand." "Nothing" is usually

accompanied by a woman's desire to turn you inside out, upside-down, and

backwards. "Nothing" is often said prior to an argument that will last

"Five Minutes" and will end with the word "Fine."

Go Ahead (with raised eyebrows)

This is not permission. This is a dare. One that will result in a woman

getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine".


Go Ahead (with normal eyebrows)

This means, "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care." You

will get the "Go Ahead with raised eyebrows" in just a few minutes,

followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five

Minutes" when she cools off.

Loud Sigh

This is not actually a word, but is still a verbal statement often

misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that

moment and is wondering why she is wasting her time arguing over "Nothing."

Soft Sigh

Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" are one of the few

things that some men actually understand. This means a woman is content

and your best bet is to not move or breathe and she will stay content.

That's Okay

This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can say to a man.

"That's Okay", means that she wants to think long and hard before paying

you retributions for whatever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is

often used with the word "Fine" and used in conjunction with the "Raised

Eyebrow Go Ahead." At some point in the near future when she has plotted

and planned, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.

Please Do

This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to

come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is

that you have done. You have a fair chance to tell the truth, so be careful

and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay".

Thanks

A woman is thanking you. Do not faint; simply say, "You're welcome."

Thanks a lot

This is much different than "Thanks." A woman will say, "Thanks a lot"

when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have hurt her in

some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh." Be careful not

to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she will only tell you

"Nothing."

[Raze]

You're silly=Doesn't know how to react (akwardness)

[kitkitkitty]

does my bum look big in this? - NO.
do my boobs look big in this? - YES.

[Wiredbomb0]

does my bum look big in this? - NO.

Okay, how exactly do you answer that question? If you say no, she will think you're lying, and if you say yes, she'll get annoyed at you

It's a lose-lose situation

[kitkitkitty]

kiss her and say she looks beautiful.

[Raze]

does my bum look big in this? - NO.
do my boobs look big in this? - YES.

That's the kitty way of talking saying no and yes. lol!

[kitkitkitty]

That's the kitty way of talking saying no and yes. lol!

yes!!

[Junket]

does my bum look big in this? - NO.

That's an insult nowadays, big asses are IN!

[IndiReloaded]

This. Joke. Is. Old.

[ecojeanne]

classic, it's classically true

[nerdy_guy]

This. Joke. Is. Old.

Who came first? this or you?

[Junket]

Indie just got pwned.

[IndiReloaded]

Who came first? this or you?

Me. Just who do you think invented it?

[nerdy_guy]

So this is what happens when an academic joins a love forum huh? lol

[Junket]

Me. Just who do you think invented it?

Nerd just got pwned.