Something's Wrong

[Raze]

My gf is mad about something... won't answer my calls or my texts... I left her a message. She said something about not knowing what she wants in life. I'm preparing mentally for her to dump me... I just have a feeling. Oh well. Back to the old drawing board.

[ecojeanne]

what happened today?

[Raze]

I have no clue. I was just at work and texted her and she posted something on facebook around that time of not knowing what she wants... around the time she stopped responding to everything.

[lahnnabell]

Could be a life change that she's not ready to talk about yet. That's the shitty part about FB. It causes and perpetuates so much drama. People update their network about their meals, relationships, epiphanies, and tragedies all in real time. Then when you finally get the news, you feel like the last to know what's up.

An emotionally mature person won't be parading their minute-to-minute emotional status on FB, in my opinion.

For now, try to be patient and let her come out with it. She got your texts and voicemails. Let her do the work now.

[ecojeanne]

fb is so dangerous

[donkeyy0]

I doubt Facebook is what the problem is. If there's a problem, it was going to happen with or without Facebook. It's a pain, but it's not what is causing the problems.

If there are problems where she "doesn't know what she wants", I say give her time. Don't pursue her, let her figure out what life is like without you. If you read on the "Broken Hearts" thread, I'm going through something similar (except that she didn't randomly stop speaking to me) in terms of "what do I want". Let her figure it out. As long as you haven't done something seriously wrong (which from the sounds of it you haven't), I don't think you can really do anything at this point to convince her of anything. BUT, at the same time...if she initiates a serious conversation...You should probably keep lines of communication open.

I would suggest however asking her to explain the Facebook update...and if it is indeed about you, just ask her to keep your issues away from Facebook for the whole world to see. That should be done just out of respect for you.

[lahnnabell]

I wasn't saying FB was THE problem, but FB makes problems like this one worse. You've got one party divulging teeny bits of information to the public like a tease. Typically this results in multiple parties prying out of worry, "OH, what's wrong?" "I'm here if you need me." It's a cry for attention. Instead of dealing with the issue and including those who matter most, people feel the need to exacerbate problems through the use of FB.

[QueenofCorona]

I think its pretty immature for her to put that out there on FB but not talk to you. Sounds like immature attention whore games to me. You don't need that.

[adam95]

yeah that is what sucks about facebook. i actually closed my account juz cuz of how annoying most of my friends made me (yes its my friends fault, not FB but i just dont wanna deal with that)
well maybe its not about you. is she having any problems in work or uni (whatever she does)?

[girl68]

Is this the girl you JUST asked to be your gf? (or is that another poster?)

[Kayla]

I think its pretty immature for her to put that out there on FB but not talk to you. Sounds like immature attention whore games to me. You don't need that.

^this along with the fact that I think its kind of self centered and bitchy to just drop someone without any explanation or apparent reason. A simple conversation would have been the considerate thing for her to do.

[Raze]

BUMP: She was talking about her life, not us. She's trying to get a better job. She said she would never post anything about us without notifying me first. She really likes me a lot.

My instincts are really bad. Heh. She wants to be with me for a long time.

As for the calling, she did call me back twice that day when I was at a meeting and said "is everything okay, Chris?"

She did not break up with any way, shape, or form. If anything, are relationship has gotten better. I appreciate all the input, but don't bash her. It was just me misinterpreting things. She's a really amazing person. If anything, bash me.

[xxazurexx]

If anything, bash me. ...

Oooooh don't tempt me, lol

Glad you are both sorted now.

[adam95]

im glad its all worked out for you. i told you its not about you