guy's could you possibly explain this guy's behavior?

[ailvasharpova]

he's my ex. we were good friends, started dating but i broke up with him as i was too scared at 13 to become committed to a long term relationship. he was heart broken and cried and rang my best friend asking her if she thought we'd ever get back together. then he started to ignore me and cut me out of his life.

then i got a text saying "i still like you text back" and before i could answer he said sorry that was my friend pranking you.

now it's been 3 years since we broke up and he still looks the other way when we pass on the street.

i've had other boyfriends (nothing serious) and he's had other gfs. we're both single now and i still feel the same way about him: i like him a lot. i'm older now and ready for a serious relationship so i might try and contact him but i need to know what's going on in his mind.

so guys would you have let your friend prank a girl like that? would it have meant that you hated her or liked her?

if you can't look at a girl does that mean you hate her or you have feelings for her and are afraid to show them??

any opinions, advice or guesses would be greatly appreciated!

thanks!

[girl68]

you're just a child at 13 why are you trying to grow up so fast?!

[ailvasharpova]

i'm nearly 17 now! at 13 i held that exact opinion. i didn't want to fall in love and stay with the same guy. the issue now is, i still like him.... no other guy ever compares or ever will. we were childhood sweethearts and i keep trying to make myself forget him but i can't. the thought of not being with him has made my eyes water on many an occasion over the past few years. all my other relationships were short and casual as at the back of my mind i think i'm going to end up with him....

i am a weirdo aren't i?!

[girl68]

I think you're young and idealistic- he's changed A LOT in 4 years and you with both continue to change so very, very much in the next bunch of years. I'm sorry but I doubt you will end up with your long lost love.

[ailvasharpova]

i am young and idealistic but that doesn't mean i shouldn't try and figure out what he might have been thinking and feeling. getting to know him again is an option if he doesn't hate me. it might mean we get back together or it might mean i realise he's changed or that we're better off as friends. either way i'll have closure and i won't have let this person slip out of my life never to be seen again. that would be sad.

also, girl68, are you a guy? i just wanted to know what a guy thought of this... men's minds and especially young boys minds work differently so they might shed new light on the situation.

i appreciate your input though! i must accept the huge possibility that this tale will not end happily ever after no matter how painful that might seem.

[TheTooya]

*cough* guy posting in the ask-male-forum

He sounds immature, if you are going to a University your better on not dealing with the drama.

That said, why he continues to look at you... could be a number of things.

Does he hate you? Probably not.

Does he want a relationship with you? ... Once again, probably not.

Once you break up with someone, you usually go no-contact, especially if you are on the receiving end of things. For some guys like me, once theres a real break up, you tend to not want to go back... ever. If your a decent guy, you don't want to lead the girl on with hope, so you just distance yourself as much as possible.

Do you have a shot? Probably, you could find out by asking HIM out instead. But, I honestly would say move on.

[inSearchOf]

Go after him. If you want him, you SHOULD contact him. Talk to him, ask him what he's been up to, you were just wondering about him, etc....but make sure you don't make yourself too available. Even if he tries to play it off like he's not into you, fact is you broke his heart and he will always remember that. He WILL like this, if he shows it or not. Maybe he will keep his game face on and talk to you about other girls, don't let it distract you because little does he know, you are ready for it. He may try to test you, his guard is sky high since he had such trouble getting over you before. If you end up getting him to the point where he starts to call/text you, he's thinking about you. Let him know that this is perfectly fine and you enjoy hearing from him. Don't make him feel awkward or out of place, let him know that you like when he talks to you. You should make him wonder if you really are into him still, but don't flat out TELL him. Tell him you are just friends, but you should seem available enough. If you can get him to this point, he's interested. By then, you should be able to trust your instincts and reel him in (lol).

Oh, and about the "i still like you" text. It could have been a prank, but maybe not...I've texted a girl something dumb like that before and was so embarrassed I fired one off real quick saying someone was messing on my phone.

[IncognitoSir]

*cough* guy posting in the ask-male-forum

He sounds immature, if you are going to a University your better on not dealing with the drama.

That said, why he continues to look at you... could be a number of things.

Does he hate you? Probably not.

Does he want a relationship with you? ... Once again, probably not.

Once you break up with someone, you usually go no-contact, especially if you are on the receiving end of things. For some guys like me, once theres a real break up, you tend to not want to go back... ever. If your a decent guy, you don't want to lead the girl on with hope, so you just distance yourself as much as possible.

Do you have a shot? Probably, you could find out by asking HIM out instead. But, I honestly would say move on.

Thats pretty confusing their guy. If you're still thinking about him after all this time, go for it, you'll never be happy or able to be happy until you find out if it'll work or if it won't. Like others have said a lot of change has happened and will happen, BUT that doesnt mean this change cant be in your favor........think about it.

[amoamo1980]

I think not looking at you means he is uncomfortable. Possibly because he still feels something for you, whether that is just the remains of what was emotional attachment or a longing for me. I fear looking at my ex and I dont hate her, want her back or any of that. But looking at her face brings back good memories, and they hurt the most.

I've used the 'That was my friend' trick before too. I think it means 'I meant that... but I shouldnt have said it and I need to hide it'.

[Regnent]

Ask him outright. You won't know unless you ask.
There might be something, there might not be. I didn't see my HS sweetheart for nearly 2 years before hooking up again.
Don't bank on it, find out and stop guessing.

[TheTooya]

Thats pretty confusing their guy. If you're still thinking about him after all this time, go for it, you'll never be happy or able to be happy until you find out if it'll work or if it won't. Like others have said a lot of change has happened and will happen, BUT that doesnt mean this change cant be in your favor........think about it.

I don't think its all that confusing. There are plenty of guys who are not actively seeking relationships, but might enter one because well, 'why the hell not?' Hmm?

[NBT]

Sooooo, you were too scared to have a relationship @ the time, yet you still had other boyfriends AFTER him?

Why not just cut yourself off from the WORLD if guys scared you?

Sounds to me like you got what you deserved.

You dump him, break his heart, and move on, yet now you want him BACK?

I'd say "screw you" if I were him. You blew it.

However, since I'm NOT him, I still think there's a chance you two can get back together.

Just don't be surprised if it's YOU that gets hurt THIS time.

I'll say that again:

Don't be surprised if it's YOU that gets hurt this time....

[amoamo1980]

Oh nbt do shut up. 13? Understandably scared of relationships. The years after this are when a lot of people grow up. You are being absolutely ridiculous.

[NBT]

Oh nbt do shut up. 13? Understandably scared of relationships. The years after this are when a lot of people grow up. You are being absolutely ridiculous.

LOL. Thank you. Thank you.

Look...

Who's to say she won't get scared again the NEXT time she starts to get close?

At 17, you really aren't that much more mature emotionally than you are at 13.

So what makes 17 so different?

Besides, as I said, if relationships SCARED her at 13, she wouldn't have still dated OTHER people at 13 AFTER that.

The fact is, she's acting on feelings and emotions right now. NOT LOGIC.

And until she's MATURE enough to LOGICALLY ask herself (and ANSWER) what will happen if she gets too close THIS time, she shouldn't be in a serious relationship. Period.

[amoamo1980]

Okay sorry, I understand some of your points (Although I don't agree with them) But I don't think you addressed them very appropriately. Love is a sensitive issue and everybody deals with it differently. 14-16 is when I personally made the biggest emotional advance.
Maybe she shouldn't have dated other people at 13-14. But that was a mistake she made.

Like I said, I kind of understand your points, I just didn't feel there was a need to be aggressive as she's clearly upset.

And nobody can logically answer what will happen when she gets too close next time as it depends who she is getting close to, how they react, how she will react upon his response etc.