How to tell if a guy just wants to get laid?

[Ponia]

I've been thinking about this lately and can't figure what was his real intention, so to make long story short I've known this guy through work for like 6 months but we've only seen each other a few times within this time period maybe around 4 or 5 i guess, during our scheduled meetings we would usually discuss about work related stuff mainly but I've noticed that he was asking some personal question in between which i though unnecessary or not related,

And the last time when i met him he knew that i needed some help to get a job and I've told him about that but of course i din't ask for a help but he offered that he'd help me out voluntarily and like you can call me if you need anything /at that time i def knew he was kinda interested in me/ so i was helpless and decided to call him and listen to what he's gonna say about helping me out so i've met him again to see whether he's really up for it, but to be honest i was just testing him i met him while he was at work so we couldn't talk that much so he told me that we can meet up for a drink later on that night i was so naive back then thought we would really discuss about it so i \said yeah sure.

And yeah we met up for a drink later that night it was kinda late and i was wondering does he really work till late at night??? and he bring me to this low light kinda romantic pub type of place it was very dark i could barely see my way! and we've ordered a bottle of wine and started drinking , he was telling to finish most of it as he can't really drink that much ! i'm like are you serious ?? and later on i felt he was getting high but not totally drunk and started getting real close to me and held my hand with his one hand and the other hand was laying on my thigh thank god i was wearing jeans, son after that he started talking about his probs and so on i was like blah blah blah at that time even i was uncomfortable with him doing that i was telling myself i need to keep rolling this work related relation with him i can't possibly ruin that, maybe he thought that i liked the attention? Anyways and he was asking me whether i was single or looking for any potential partner just like him well he told in an indirect way , he made himself very clear but I've given him confusing answers to those questions, and in the end he's asked me whether i want to follow him to his place he's mentioned earlier that he was living all by himself, i was like no way! i'll go home and thats pretty much it I've walked in front of him pretty fast after we've left the drink place and i left for him without even saying goodbye cos i was angry,,, thats pretty much it its too long but please forgive me for that i couldn't put it into a few sentences.

So the thing thats troubling me is what was his intention behind all these?? did he just wanted to get laid? or because he was high he so that he couldn't really care what he was saying or doing? while i was meeting him through work related meetings i've never thought he would act that way which was a shock!!

Please guy i really need your opinions on this

[vashti]

Umm... I'm not male, but it's a bad idea to go drinking alone with someone you work with that you KNOW is interested when you aren't. Obviously, he wants to have sex. You going off with him to a dimly lit pub alone gave him the impression you were up for it, too.

If you want to be treated as a professional, you must act like one. Live and learn.

To answer your original question (how to tell if he just wants to get laid), you don't sleep with him. If he is interested in YOU as a person, he will still come around.

[Ponia]

Now that i'm thinking back i was very naive and stupid though its happened only 2 months ago anyways thanks for ur opinion, i'll have to keep that in mind

[xxazurexx]

Yeah I agree with Vashti. The very fact that you went off to this pub, would have made him think that you were up for the same thing, he may have had in mind.

Men will test women and in lots of different ways, to pick up clues that let him know what type of woman you are...how 'easy' you would be. After his assessment of you, due to what you have done/said...you either fall into the 'throwback' or the 'keeper' category. The 'throwback' is the woman he will date and bed, but he doesn't view her as relationship material. The 'keeper' is the woman he views as being 'relationship material'....I read this in a 'man' book, written by a guy, lol

It's also as 'simple' as Vash says, in that the only way to know if he's after sex, is to not sleep with him. Make him wait. An interested guy sticks around longer than 2 seconds and he continues to show a consistant and genuine interest, despite not getting any from you.

[Cosmo]

Has he pretended to listen to you for more than 5 minutes at a time? Probably expecting to get laid then.
lol... joking.

It's pretty obvious though if a guy wants to get laid. If he likes you he'll want to hang out at any time during the day, as long as its not a friendzone date. If he just wants to get laid he'll only want to hang out during the nights or on weekends. This depends on work schedule though.

[CAM]

The OP's general question...easy answer: guys always want to get laid. I just got laid and I want to get laid.

[irrelevant_89]

^ the question is when do they just want to get laid... and I'm not the one to answer it because I've yet to know how it feels like.

[Gigabitch]

He did everything buy take his pants off and rub up against your leg. How much more clear could he have made it?

[Ponia]

Now i hate myself for giving him the wrong impression, how silly i was ? He's almost 10 years older than me by the way so maybe he thought its so easy for him to get me to bed ?
How should i not let this kind of things happen to me again?

[pclepel]

Definitely wanted to get laid. I'm sure he cares about you, not just like a f**k-em and leave-em, but that's what he was going for.

[the ice man]

The guy wants to not only but also. Like there was no question but the defense is committed to reality? Change in perception is necessary.