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Thread: Attraction?

  1. #1
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    Attraction?

    I'm dating a guy that I don't find physically attractive. He is a really nice guy and that's the reason I decided to start seeing him, but when we're alone sometimes I just think about it. At times I feel extremely bad that I judge him based on his looks, other times I think everybody does it, it is done to me. I don't know what to do. Do I stop dating him? Do I continue dating him and hope that his personality will win out? Advice please.

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    Well, there needs to be a degree of physical attraction present if the relationship is to fully solidify. Unless you are content not having a sexual relationship with this guy, but something tells me that is not the case. Do you worry about what others think of you when you're out with him? Or do you just feel no physical pull toward him?

    I'm guessing that because he's nice, he's very attentive to you. You probably like that, but don't use him for it. It'll only hurt him in the long-run when you have to explain why you're still hanging around even though you're not attracted to him physically. Just go and find a nice guy that you ARE physically attracted to.

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    If it doesn't at least grow while getting to know him it probably won't work. Often times it does grow when you get to know the person better but it might not and at that point you should cut your losses.

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    Well, how bad is it? Could he grow on you, or is he just **** ugly and there's nothing to be done?
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    lol

    I wasn't that particularly attracted to my ex husband when I met him. He wasn't repulsive, but he didn't exactly make me go 'wow' either. But he had a great personality, etc and he grew on me.

    If he resembles Quasimodo, you may have a problem

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    You shouldn't feel bad about not being physically attracted to the guy. Like lahnnabel said, there needs to be some physical attraction there. I think you're selling yourself short if you're with someone you're not physically attracted to. Looks are just a single trait of this guy. Obviously there is something else that has attracted you to him. Some guys have amazing bodies and a sucky personality while others have amazing personalities and sucky bodies. It's all about what makes you happy in the end. You're probably scared of coming off as shallow, but the fact that you actually have gotten to know this guy beyond his looks proves that indeed you are not shallow. Give it some time and see if his personality is enough for you, otherwise don't waste his nor your time on something you know doesnt work for you.

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    Thank you all for your responses. I don't really care about what others think. I feel no desire to do anything physical with him, not even a kiss. IncognitoSir and lahnnabel you're both right I am just going to stop seeing him. Thanks again

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    I can't think why you even got with him in the first place and when there wasn't any attraction.

    Do you often date men you are not attracted too?

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    Never have before no. I just though that he was really sweet and people told me to at least give it a try, maybe something might grow. It hasn't and I really don't think it will.

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    Do? Do not doubt it. You doubt yourself? Did you lose your personality? Prevailing rate of self-

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    Quote Originally Posted by the ice man View Post
    Do? Do not doubt it. You doubt yourself? Did you lose your personality? Prevailing rate of self-
    ... I... I really don't understand half of what you say on this forum mate.... just putting that out there....

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    The other half is not his understanding?

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