Ex Acting Strange

[ben86]

Me and my ex broke up about 6 weeks ago, and for the first three weeks she was practically begging to stay in touch saying she just needed time to get her head together, and then said she was thinking about getting back together after her exams which finish in a few weeks. Since then I texted her a couple of times, probably 5 times over the space of a month, but didn't get a reply. I asked her best friend what was up and she basically said she didn't want to commit to the idea of getting back together which I thought was fair enough. She eventually got her to text me Monday and all she basically said was "stop texting me, seriously", "i've moved on and hope you can too", and then said she'd met someone else, so I politely said well I hope he makes you happy just wish you said sooner, kinda thing, deleted her number and said bye. I said thanks to her mate and asked if it was true about her meeting someone else and she said "umm she was kinda seeing somone but it didn't work out" Then the next night she phoned me out of the blue at 1 in the morning when she was out but didn't say anything so I hung up and texted her asking what she wanted, then she didn't reply until about 3 just saying sorry for waking me up and just saying about her night out, then that she'd love to talk but was nodding off, then I said no worries give us text 2mo or something, and obviously she didn't reply....Is she just doing it for the attention or something?

[lahnnabell]

Yes. She wants attention.

If you want to move on, stop talking to her. That other guy didn't work out apparently so now she's back to hitting you up in the middle of the night. You can either accept her behavior and stop bitching, or you can put a stop to it permanently by cutting off contact.

[xxazurexx]

She didn't want to know you and when this other guy was around, now he's dumped her, you are good enough again.

Tell her to get lost.

[ben86]

I am accepting her behaviour, I'm just trying to understand what she wants? It was nice hearing from her obviously so I didn't mind, just came as a bit of a shock because it was the first time she'd like contacted me first since we split up and it was only a day after saying she'd moved on and to leave her alone, so I was going to.

[ben86]

I don't think the other guy even exists to be honest, I think she just said that to kinda get rid of me, and then was a bit shocked by my reaction of basically saying "fair enough" and stopping chasing her. Do you think it's fair to assume she's only doing it because she doesn't want to get back together but enjoyed being chased and made a fuss of and doesn't like the idea of me now moving on?

[xxazurexx]

^^Didn't you read and understand anything that was said??

She is calling you again and because the other guy DUMPED her. If the other guy hadn't dumped her, she wouldn't have called you.

If you like being 'second best', then yes, continue to talk to her.

[xxazurexx]

I don't think the other guy even exists to be honest

Yeah whatever.

Continue to make excuses for her.

[ben86]

Yes but the other guy would've already have dumped her when she was saying to leave her alone and that she'd moved on because her mate said things didn't work out between them the same day, and it was the day after she then phoned me.

[lahnnabell]

Either way, she's playing games. And by accept her behavior I meant that you shouldn't whine about it. If you're accepting that she's doing this, then you should expect that she'll keep doing it if she's getting the reaction she wants from you. Wouldn't you rather move on?

[xxazurexx]

Yes but the other guy would've already have dumped her when she was saying to leave her alone and that she'd moved on because her mate said things didn't work out between them the same day, and it was the day after she then phoned me.

She was probably waiting to see if the other guy called her back. When he didn't, she called you.

If it makes you happy and to be called in the middle of the night, by your screwball ex girlfriend, then good luck.

[ben86]

But why call and not say anything, and then when she does text back not say anything in particular? I mean it's hardly a case of her suddenly chasing me and begging to get back together? Just seems a tad pointless?

[xxazurexx]

But why call and not say anything, and then when she does text back not say anything in particular? I mean it's hardly a case of her suddenly chasing me and begging to get back together? Just seems a tad pointless?

She probably didn't answer and because she lost her bottle to talk. She knows that you know about the other guy and she won't have known how you were going to react.

She texts and says nothing in particular, because she is testing to see if you are still talking to her.

If she will entertain other guys, then she is not interested in you.

She just wants to keep you around and incase she meets no one else.

[ben86]

Ah, that's pretty much exactly what I was thinking she was doing. I'm still not sure about the whole other guy thing, to me it just doesn't add up, but have to assume she wasn't lying i guess!

[xxazurexx]

Why would she lie about another guy though?

Did you end it with her or did she end it?

If you ended it, then I could see why she may mention another guy. To try and get you jealous.
But if she ended it, then I'm seeing no reason why she'd want to make you jealous.

[ben86]

Dunno, her head's just completely messed up I think. This was what happened here:
[url]http://www.loveforum.net/broken-hearts-forum/41053-dumped-out-blue.html[/url]