end of the road

[mel2208]

Hi there guys...

im feeling rather low today. Ive decided to split from my bf after a lot of thinking..He has messed me about, he says he loves me but he insists on putting me 2nd to his mother...oh and money comes first too. He lets his mother tell him what to do!! hes bloody 30!! So ive had enough...ive told him how it makes me feel, but nothing changed.. Im hoping i ll get over this soon..Just hard knowing that youve gotta end it but your feelings for each other are still so immence... has anyone else had to end something they didnt want to?

[QueenofCorona]

Yep, been there. You can't change anyone but yourself.

[Incognito]

Yes mel. I remember your original post about a moth ago regarding your situation. I'm glad that you decided to take a stand. Breaking up always hurts at first, even when the relationship sucked. I had to make a choice like that a long time ago. It was very painful and extremely emotional, but it had to be done. I broke up with a woman who I was dating because I had depression at the time and she was diagnosed with multiple sclorosis. Her health and ability to do everyday activities declined rapidly over a matter of weeks. We had been talking about marriage, but I knew that her death was a definit possibility in the near future. I wrote her a letter telling her that I thought that we should break up and told her exactly why. I knew that had we been married that I wasn't ready at 18 to take care of someone whose health was fading and wait for them to die. I'd have killed myself because of my depression. I cried as I wrote the letter, I sent it, cried more, and cried as we talked about it on the phone. It hurt like hell, but it was what was best for me in the end.

All I can do is to tell you to find things/activities to occupy your time. Busy hands and a busy mind make it easier to cope with sorrow.

[shine aji]

I am proud that you stood up for yourself. This will only make you stronger and you will be able to decide what you want in the future. It will not be any worse it will get better but you have to work for it, its not a piece of cake

[BelievNLove]

It shows how well you know who you are when you are able to do what is best for yourself even when you still love the other person.

[mel2208]

Hi there
Just wanted to say thankyou for your input...it is much appreciated..Im feeling much better today about things and im feeling much stronger in myself.. I know its probably gonna be hard and i will be up nd down for a bit..but i do feel like a lot of stress has disapeared.. I know ive made the right decision and im sticking by that.xx

Just wanted to say thanks to incognito. I can imagine what you had to go through was very very tough on you too. Thanks for sharing that. xx

[cmacattack1]

Even if it was a horrible relationship where he physically and verbally assaulted you, I'm sure some part of you would still hurt and feel guilty for losing this person that you have spent so much time with and form a bond to. It's like losing a part of you, dare I say an arm or a leg. Every day is about learning to do things again without this person. It will be difficult you will have your ups and downs, but have satisfaction knowing you did this for you and that realistically things would have gotten worse. There is usually never an "aha!" moment where he just does a complete 180 and becomes the person you want. You did the right thing.