I'm 16 and my teacher's 44. I have a feeling that he might like me too. I know it's a big age difference, but I can't help it. He's in here. *points to heart* I can never tell if he's flirting with me or not. When he sits next to me, he's unbelieveably close. I've seen him sit next to other students, and there's like enough space between them to fit a bag. When I was finished taking my PSAT (that time back in October), I caught him looking at me. He quickly turned away, and I could see an embarrassed look on his face. On a stairway in my school, I caught him looking at my legs, but I'm not sure if that counts, because I was wearing black stockings. i don't know. We talk a lot, he's the only teacher in my school I have real conversations with. The main reason we talk a lot is because i'm sort of on the school's sport's team, and he's the coach. Sometimes when I'm around him, his face turns red. We look at each other constantly, and he smiles at me a lot. I feel like I can talk to him about anything. It's been this way since Freshman year. One time last year, after a game, I was waiting outside the school for my mom. He waited with me. He said to me, "At least we get to spend some quality time together." and he smiled at me.
One time at practice, my friend Jeniffer was looking through my folder and found a picture of Johnny Depp(my favorite actor)My teacher sneaked up behind her, and said "What are you doing?" She said, "We're looking at (my name)'s boyfriend." My teacher gave me a weird look, and I almost thought he was jealous. He asked, (to Jeniffer), "Does she have a picture of him?" He said, "He looks a little old." and he looked at me. I said to him, "He's your age." He looked at me, "My age?" I said, "Almost, you're older by a few months." Then later on, he told Jeniffer to get up and start playing. My teacher said, (to Jeniffer), "You should be playing better than me. I'm an old man....I'm old as pirate guy." and he looked at me. He said, "arrghh I'm a pirate." Then later on, when we were walking back to school, my phone was ringing. It was a number I didn't recognize so I didn't answer it. My teacher asked, "That wasn't pirate guy was it?" I said, "No." He asked me, "Ever see the movie, Edward Scissorhands?" I said "yeah." One time I was reading the school newspaper with him, and our arms brushed against each other, and he seemed, i don't know tense.
There was this one time where the team had a game that day. I was sitting there with him, and He said he was going to draw pictures of our team. (my friend got bored, so she drew pictures too) (that's why my teacher started drawing) We looked at each other constantly, while he was drawing. It took him like a half hour, and when he was done, I was surprised. My teacher had drawn me as a sunflower. It even had my eyes. My friend asked the teacher, "Who's that supossed to be?" (pointing to my picture) He said, "It's (my name)." My teacher said, "Look at the eyes." And he smiled at me.
The other day, he really hurt me. I saw him kiss his wife. I swore I felt my heart breaking, like it dropped to the pit of my stomach, like my heart was just ripped out. Later on, it looked like he was going to kiss her again, but he didn't. Just as he was about to, he looked at me. I guess he saw the hurt look on my face, because he backed away from his wife. I just wish he would stop hurting me. But the worst part is, he doesn't even know he's doing it. He keeps leaving me confused half of the time. You can't have a wife, and flirt with one of your students. I can't even begin to explain how I feel. This is completely pointless, he keeps crappin' on me and I still keep holding on.
I know most of you will say "Oh forget it! He's never going to like you! It's innappropiate! It's wrong and disgusting!" Even though I respect most of your opinions, haven't you ever been in a situation like this? Not exactly same as mine, but having an unrequited love. You should know how terrible it feels. Watching someone you love..love someone else. It's the worse kind of heartbreak. I've tried getting over him...twice! No matter what I do, I still fall back in love with him.
So can anyone give me advice? Is he really flirting with me? what do I do?