Need Some Advice.

[secret.admirer]

Getting Straight to the point , There's a girl i really love , i mean REALLY love.

Am 19 and this is the first time I've experience such feelings and i really fell for it.....

We became good friends, but i was mad so i told her my feelings about after a month , and she asked me to never talk to her.

She also told me that she never expected this from me as she considered me as a good friend and that i never understood her as she always considered me as a good friend.

After that i literally begged for a second chance , she gave me but she always had that thought in her mind about me that i wasn't a good guy, so she was really angry every-time and so it didn't last.

I was really desperate at that time it seems when i ponder now over what i did at that time, and hence the fault was all mine since she doesn't have any faults.

After that there wasn't any contact for the next month and i tried to forget her , but i couldn't and all taht i could do was cry day and night .

Slowly and slowly i gave up eating food and my social life and presently I'm just completely pessimistic.

At the day when i told her my feelings , and she didn't even care for me , i even contemplated suicide but then left he idea pretty soon (Though i wrote this to her and she talked and tried to persuade me too ).

I can't stop thinking of her and every moment i just think about her , i get nightmares everyday.

And whenever i see her with someone else i don't get angry, i get more depressed(at which step i think i can't get any more depressed ,but i do get ).

If i just say hi to her , she would reply and then ignore me completely and talk to other people.

It's been 7 bloody months and i don't know how long this will take

Thanks for reading :'(

[VincenzoG91]

This situation probably won't work out. You started in the Friend Zone, and that is a difficult place to escape from.

Next time you're interested in a girl, don't try to become her friend first. Talk with her, flirt with her, and then ask her out. Make it known as early as possible that you are interested in her, but not as a friend.

[Asip4u]

As Vincenzo points out, hopefully you can learn from this. Being in the friend zone for so long will make you mayor of the zone and there's no way out most times. Around your age same thing happened to me and even though in my case the girl was nice about it and didn't get upset, i was kinda pissed. It took awhile but i realized after that things would have ended in disaster. There will be other girls and it's hard for you to understand that now because you're still not over this one but you will slowly get there.

[secret.admirer]

Thank you for reading and taking the time to reply vincenzo and Asip4u........really appreciated

What you both have said is correct , but it was my first time i felt such a feeling so as it's called in gaming lingo , i was a n00b.

And i seriously love her so much, that i don't think i can get over her, atleast since the past 6-7 months nothing's been improving.

Infact i tried to notify her since the start that i wanted to be more than a friend , but on the day i told her my feelings she told me that she got the hints all along but she din't want to accept them.

[Asip4u]

I think at the time i was saying those exact same things. It was too hard to let go and i thought i'd never be the same. The thing is, i started making new friends, new girls came into my life and i started changing too. Certain things became less important, i concentrated on just having fun and not worrying about getting girls. Well, all of a sudden, i started having so much fun and she was in the past. After few years i learned something new about her and it just made me realize that i would have hated being with a person like that. Sometimes things work out for the best. You'll be ok, just try to get out and hang out with friends and meet new people.

[secret.admirer]

sorry for the late reply.

I know sometimes it is for the better , but it seems i don't want to get over her,a part of me still wants me to keep waiting for her,it's like as the lyrics of a song go"I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all"

[ftm]

Thank you for reading and taking the time to reply vincenzo and Asip4u........really appreciated

What you both have said is correct , but it was my first time i felt such a feeling so as it's called in gaming lingo , i was a n00b.

And i seriously love her so much, that i don't think i can get over her, atleast since the past 6-7 months nothing's been improving.

Infact i tried to notify her since the start that i wanted to be more than a friend , but on the day i told her my feelings she told me that she got the hints all along but she din't want to accept them.

I was in your position. It was a mistake of youth. I'd like the echo the sentiments of some other posters in saying that it's almost impossible to start in the "friend zone" and get anywhere. For nearly 3 years I was madly, insanely in love with one of my best friends, to the point that I could not eat and thought of nothing else. The problem was, she was one of my best friends, and I was never going to get out of that hole.

If you are remotely interested in a girl. NEVER start out by trying to be her friend. It makes me sad that this is how it works, but it does. I wish someone had told me sooner.

For what it's worth, I got over it with time. This girl and I are still very good friends, and I've put all of that behind me. But it took many years.

[secret.admirer]

So that basically means , that if you are a friend ,then there's no chance.

I mean i thought it would be a nice idea to be friends and know her what she really is , not what she pretends , but i think it turned horribly wrong, and know i'm the one whose suffering.

[VincenzoG91]

A better potential reason to enter the Friend Zone might be if you were interested in one of her friends. I don't know if that would work, but it's something to try next time around.

[secret.admirer]

You mean if i can ever get over this debacle.

So i just have to forget her and pretend it all never existed....right :|

[girl68]

Please go talk to your school counsellor.

[Freshly]

You dont love her your infattuated, I would go get therapy or something along those lines, I genarally dont mean that in an insulting way but a girl you knew for a month your in love with and told her your contemplating suicide

[liyulianyanyu]

Often,for a guy,you must be weak for that girl.I think you will happen to a better girl.You should forget her and restart life.The good girls are in the world waiting for you to make friends.Try again and keep strong!

[secret.admirer]

appreciated , but infatuation for 7 motnhs , i dont think.

And i was wrong to say i knew her for a month , i mean we knew each other for 2-3 months , but we had started talking a lot in the last month.

And no offence taken

[Freshly]

Ive known worse/longer cases of infactuation