What do women think about dolls? (see links)

[girl68]

The difference between dildo and doll is that a doll is like a fake person. A dildo is just some shaped object that you get to rub up in there. That is the big difference.

I'd be raging livid if I found out my partner had one. But I would have ran screaming from any relationship that I can't get my rocks off in.

[Incognito]

Whatever the substitute, you seem to have a lot of them. A doll would just be one more and would be virtually impossible to conceal.

Have you ever had a healthy sexual relationship with a human being?

My wife is the first, last, and only woman I have ever had sex with, so......no. I see your point about a doll just being another toy, but one that I couldn't hide.

[Incognito]

Okay your wife says that she will have sex with you but she doesn't enjoy it and you feel bad about that...you both have some things you need to talk about. You need to figure out why she doesn't enjoy sex and you need to figure out why you have such a preoccupation with masturbation.

I'm not saying there is anything wrong with masturbation...its normal....but an 800.00 toy. I mean it just isn't worth it to me...I bet you could talk your wife into do some pretty interesting stuff for a lot less than that...I'm sure she has her eye on some shoes or jewelry....she'd know what to spend the money on and you'd be havin sex.

I really think you need to talk to her about it...I mean I don't wanta get to personal and you don't have to answer but is she having an orgasm?

And honestly the porn thing isn't that weird I don't guess to me, I dated a girl who collected porn and probably had that much...she was a lot of fun...kinda crazy...but a lot of fun.

To avoid cross posting I'll ask you to read the thread titled 'My wife has no sex drive, what can I do?' in the 'Ask a female' section. I also refuse to "talk someone into" having sex, or to pay/bribe them for it (which is what you seem to be implying with the shoes/jewelry comment). Also my "preoccupation" with masturbation is not as you make it seem. Simply put, I have a high sex drive and masturbation is my only outlet right now. If me burning all of my sex toys would cause her to have a sex drive I'd be roasting marshmallows over their flames right now. This is the real world, so that won't happen. I thought about buying a rub on skin cream that has a testosterone boosting agent in it and putting it in her regular lotion. However, it hasn't been out long and hasn't been tested thoroughly enough. As far as the $800.00 toy goes it is actually classified as a medical device, and I had to go through a bit of trouble to get it. I wouldn't pay $800.00 for a hunk of silicone (although I did pay over $300.00 for one).

[bluesummer]

I think it's so sad and awful that your wife has reduced you to thoughts of buying sexdolls and putting testosterone cream in her regular lotion to get her horny. I don't mean sad in a condescending way, just that I can't believe she would do this to a person she's married to...it's mean.

Point is, you shouldn't have to do this, any of this. She's basically psychologically abusing you, even if she's just pulling the old passive approach to sex.....lie there and let you get off. She doesn't give a crap about how this makes you feel, that she is essentially rejecting you and depriving you of any affection. I can't imagine how you live like this day in and day out.

I'm not married yet, but I've been with my fiance for three years. We hug every day. We tell each other we love one another every day. We have sex at least three times a week....and I would definitely be down for more, but some nights he's tired from his extracurriculars. You should have this too. What you need to ask yourself is, are you ever going to get this, any of this, from your wife? Ever? If the answer is a definite no, you need to get out of this mess.

[Incognito]

I'd like to thank everyone for posting, as it is nice to see that many agree with me to some extent. Its also refreshing to see that not all women are devoid of a sex drive and not all women use sex simply as a tool to get what they want. I'd also like to state for the record that I didn't start this thread with the intent of bashing my wife behind her back, but rather to find a solution to the problem. I tend to be a bit "old school" in my thinking and actions, and am a man of principle. That being said, I take my vows seriously even though this situation is far less than ideal. I don't promise to do anything that I don't intend on doing to the fullest of my ability. I also wouldn't lie about anything that I am doing or have done. I think that if you would be ashamed to admit that you did something that you shouldn't be doing it. Thats another reason I couldn't cheat. Unless she cheats, or dies (and no I'm not wishing for that) I am stuck in this marriage.

[tropigal82]

I like how they call them "Love Dolls", LOL... kinda ironic.... :-p

[Incognito]

I can't imagine how you live like this day in and day out.

My friend said the same thing. I think that to a certain extent that I have accepted it, subconsciously at least. It used to eat me alive every damned day. I used to have dreams about f*cking my own wife, which eventually turned into dreams about me f*cking other women. Now I just try and suppress that feeling of frustration. It works, but I find that I don't care as much about her anymore either. It is like I said before, like having a room mate. Yeah you do stuff together, and you eat together, but when its time to "take care of business" you do it privately and they have no part in it. I'm not saying I like that routine (or else I wouldn't be here), but that is what gets me through the day, through the week, through he month, through the year. A poor man doesn't complain that he only has beans to eat. He eats them to fill his stomach and dreams of the day that he'll have a juicy steak with onions, mushrooms, potatoes and a cold beer. So here I am trying to turn my beans to steak.

[bluesummer]

Well then Incognito, get the doll, bring out the sex toys.....stop hiding them. At this point, who gives a rat's ass if they offend her. She doesn't give a rip about you.

Being a man of principal is certainly admirable, but this is all to her advantage and none to yours. It's one thing to be moral, and quite another to be self-flagellating.

[Incognito]

Like I said I wouldn't lie about anything I do, but I don't invite conflict either. I actually wonder if she'd destroy them. It would take a lot of money for me to replace them all. I also understand your point about this seeming to be self flagellating (I had no idea what that word meant at first and had to look it up ), but it is what it is and I have to work within the confines of the marriage until she screws up.

[dewilliams2]

I still think the best thing to do is talk to your wife...I mean have you done this yet? Have you told her you need more sex and you want her to enjoy it...maybe she would like some of her own toys brought in or porn...maybe she would enjoy role playing...and then if you find something that sounds interesting to her talk her into trying some of those creams or pills they have now...I wouldn't open with that though.

I didn't mean to bribe your wife...that was more of a joke than being serious.

[Chupacabras]

I'd be sitting on the couch jacking off to Grey's Anatomy or some shit. Screw hiding it and certainly screw buying an f-doll.

[IndiReloaded]

Sounds to me like you want a divorce but can't bring yourself to it. Do you have kids, sorry if I missed that.

As for those women who have lots of sex... might want to ask them how LONG they've been married to their current partner. There is something called the Honeymoon phase. I'm not putting any of the other ladies down, just in perspective. Giga might want to mention how much sex she was having with her ex in the years before they split and how satisfying it was. Bluesum is engaged to be married to a great guy after a horrific divorce. Those types of life events changes ones perspective.

Vash & I have been married the longest here, far as I know. I've been with my husband for 20 years, married for most of them. First marriages, both of us.

While we don't get it on like rabbits anymore several times a day (not all the time, anyway), we certainly enjoy sex on a regular basis. Its a bonding and stress-releasing experience. But we did go through a bad patch of our marriage (about a year) where neither of us was feeling too friendly, much less frisky, towards the other. Such things pass and are a normal part of marriage, IMO.

Women enjoy sex with men who meet their emotional needs. Men tend to come at it from the other direction. It sounds to me that neither of you communicate all that well. Its easy to pin this all on your wife, but I know from experience that such states rarely happen in a vacuum. I would suggest getting some couple's counselling to sort out some of your deeper issues.

Good luck.

[bluesummer]

So.....cheating is screwing up, but sexual deprivation is not? So you've resolved to living in misery and sticking it out to keep the moral high ground. Damn, give me your address and I'll send some hottie over to rock your wife's world and tape it for you. Problem solved.

Oh, and Indi.....i'm sure our sex life will slow down over the years. But I enjoy it now so much more so because of our actual bond/emotional connection (which I can experience without the sex, but it's still nice that way too). I'm not so unrealistic to think it's going to be this rampant in 20 years. However, it certainly will never get to the point Incognito is at, never. If things were that way in my marriage and we couldn't patch it up after counselling, I'd probably check out.

[Doc Durian]

Pulverized viagra would work better...

Grind it up, slip it into something she wouldn't suspect and spend some non-sexual time with her, enjoying each others company.

Do it 2-3 times... she won't be able to ignore the engorgement down there while her mind is also being stimulated.

But don't make the first move.

Gradually, over time... reduce the amount of pulverized Viagra in her foodstuffs.

Never tell her anything about it, whether it works out for you or not.

[Incognito]

I still think the best thing to do is talk to your wife...I mean have you done this yet? Have you told her you need more sex and you want her to enjoy it...maybe she would like some of her own toys brought in or porn...maybe she would enjoy role playing...and then if you find something that sounds interesting to her talk her into trying some of those creams or pills they have now...I wouldn't open with that though.

I didn't mean to bribe your wife...that was more of a joke than being serious.

Yes, I've told her for years that I want more sex. Eventually I stopped telling her because I felt like I was begging. As far as wanting her to enjoy it, she claims she does and seems to orgasm (see comments earlier in thread between gigabitch and I). She is against toys of any kind for either of us. That is unfortunate because I found and purchased a really neat vibrator online (years ago) that mounts to a tongue ring or mounts to a tongue strap (for those who, like myself, don't have a tongue ring). After much persuasion she allowed me to use it once and never again. In case anyone is interested it is called 'Tongue Joy'. I'm not sure if it is still sold or not. She is opposed to porn, and has no will to role play (I have yet to talk her into having sex any place other than the bed).