so i said I love you...

[randoman]

i said it with complete comfidence that she felt the same way ;P and i am still confident her feelings didnt change for me. seeing how she didnt reply back did made me feel sad abit tho.hence this thread.

[bwyand]

I swear i joined this forum thinking i'd actually get advice, but 99% of the time I get better responses on a pot smoking forum in their "love sex, and relationships" area. Sorry for people being idiots... but I'll try and help...

I always play a stupid game when it comes to saying I love you. If I think I am ready to say it I find a way for her to say it first... Ex: with my current girlfriend one night I just all of a sudden really started to think I do love her, but instead of just saying it I waited for the right moment to say something like "Oh wow u must really love me" in a question type of tone. Her reponse is I do, do you love me back?

I was set at that point, and you can't just light up with joy. I pondered for a second and sarcastically said Ya I guess.

Idk if this really helps with your question, but i think it should help you in the near future. But last thing: never let a girl think you like her more then she likes you... ever!!!!! In this case you kinda did bro, im sorry, but try and play it cool now. Don't cold sholder her but for however much affection she gives you, give half of it back if that makes sense.

[lavnder]

Hmmm...so she's not comfortable saying it back. You could ask her where she's at in all this. You could just do what you feel is right express your love whenever, it won't be a turn off unless she's not that into you.

[thrillaveza]

yeah i agree to what they are saying as well. i ****ed up a 'could-be' relationship by saying 'i love you' and hinting that i was overly interested in her too soon and too much. i can understand i was being an immature, clingy, hopeless romantic and now i'm biting myself over it. but yeah what you and i should have done was to keep it cool and not show an obvious amount of affection of interest.

i don't want to say that it's ruined for you, cause yet you still have a chance. perhaps from now on, keep it cool.

[bluesummer]

My ex-husband said he "loved me" after dating for two months, and I didn't feel the same, so I said "thanks". He was hurt that I didn't say it back, but I didn't feel it. I think I told him a few days later I loved him out of guilt.

I haven't been in a situation where I haven't responded when I felt the same way back. The fact that she didn't respond to you in kind is a little disconcerting, although if she's never said 'those words' to someone before it might be a little scary. I don't suggest you say it again, at least not for awhile. Give her time to either get comfortable enough to respond, or at least reveal how she feels about you in return. I dare say men tend to fall harder and faster than women a lot of the time, although they don't like to admit it. I've never HAD to say "I love you" first to a guy, because they always beat me to the punch. Sometimes they were a little too ahead of the game. Understand? Relax and don't get too ahead of yourself, let her catch up.

[Doc Durian]

My ex-husband said he "loved me" after dating for two months, and I didn't feel the same, so I said "thanks". He was hurt that I didn't say it back, but I didn't feel it. I think I told him a few days later I loved him out of guilt.

I haven't been in a situation where I haven't responded when I felt the same way back. The fact that she didn't respond to you in kind is a little disconcerting, although if she's never said 'those words' to someone before it might be a little scary. I don't suggest you say it again, at least not for awhile. Give her time to either get comfortable enough to respond, or at least reveal how she feels about you in return. I dare say men tend to fall harder and faster than women a lot of the time, although they don't like to admit it. I've never HAD to say "I love you" first to a guy, because they always beat me to the punch. Sometimes they were a little too ahead of the game. Understand? Relax and don't get too ahead of yourself, let her catch up.

And that's probably indicative of why he is your "ex"... just guessing...

[bluesummer]

Yeah, it might have had a thing or two to do with it.

[Doc Durian]

Trust given without it being earned can often send hazard signals to the brain...

...whether one heeds them, at the moment... or much later.... depends on the situation and the person.

Some are eternal optimists...others, pessimists... others still, wedged in the inbetween grey area state which takes gain/loss/and later seperation to put things into perspective.

(I've almost always been of the later)

Don't you wish you were spiritually sound at 16, sometimes?

[doppelgaenger]

hahahhahahahhahahhahhahhahha! this guy is ****in' hilarious.

[jessZ]

I've got a pretty different perspective than the other posters on this issue. My current bf told me he loved me after we were together maybe 6 weeks or so and I didn't say it back - not because I didn't feel it, but because I was overwhelmed with feeling and also a little bit afraid of commitment after a 5&1/2yr relationship. But him saying it first didn't in any way make me think less of him or feel that I had some kind of 'power' over him. To the contrary, I actually really respected him for having the confidence to say how he was feeling. After that he said it a few more times, and he actually told me he didn't mind if I wasn't ready to say it back. A few weeks later I said it because I just couldn't hold back any longer!

so it is possible that your gf is just nervous about it. For me, hearing those words is almost a relief or something. It makes me relax and feel secure enough to stick around. And you said that things have been going well since, so I don't think you need to worry really. If she is still keen to spend time with you, is still sweet and happy in your company, I'd say she just needs time.

[randoman]

I swear i joined this forum thinking i'd actually get advice, but 99% of the time I get better responses on a pot smoking forum in their "love sex, and relationships" area. Sorry for people being idiots... but I'll try and help...

I always play a stupid game when it comes to saying I love you. If I think I am ready to say it I find a way for her to say it first... Ex: with my current girlfriend one night I just all of a sudden really started to think I do love her, but instead of just saying it I waited for the right moment to say something like "Oh wow u must really love me" in a question type of tone. Her reponse is I do, do you love me back?

I was set at that point, and you can't just light up with joy. I pondered for a second and sarcastically said Ya I guess.

Idk if this really helps with your question, but i think it should help you in the near future. But last thing: never let a girl think you like her more then she likes you... ever!!!!! In this case you kinda did bro, im sorry, but try and play it cool now. Don't cold sholder her but for however much affection she gives you, give half of it back if that makes sense.

Hum thanks for the advice, things are cool with her after that, she tried to hint that she is too shy to say it back to me, but i stayed my ground n told her its fine weather she said it or not , shes very happy so far,and is very sweet still

Hmmm...so she's not comfortable saying it back. You could ask her where she's at in all this. You could just do what you feel is right express your love whenever, it won't be a turn off unless she's not that into you.

i waited it out and she sort of brought it up n like i said things are cool right now thanks for the reply.

yeah i agree to what they are saying as well. i ****ed up a 'could-be' relationship by saying 'i love you'

ahh that sucks bro, i dont get the deal with women , being cliny n stuff i imagine would be a turn off, but why in the world would a guy's love for them put them off lol .

hahahhahahahhahahhahhahhahha! this guy is ****in' hilarious.

seriously i still dont get the sarcasm, some one explain ..

I've got a pretty different perspective than the other posters on this issue.............. I'd say she just needs time.

my thoughts exactly, things are looking good so far am happy to say, we are still spending alot of time toghther and she is very happy around me thanks alot for all the comments!, this was my first long term relationship and i really like her, so i kinda lost my cool for a bit, now ive learned my lessons