Why do men hang on?

[Supernova]

A few questions for guys who have "been confused" in a relationship before.

1. Why do men keep in contact with a girl, if they are confused in their relationship with them, i.e. "not 100% sure if this what he wants" etc.

2. Why say hurtful things like "I have a cold because of all the girls I kiss" and laugh?

3. Why (if you are confused) would you say, love you at the end of a conversation? and sometimes text miss you?

Just a few questions because this confuses me. I have a thread about my breakup (or lack thereof) but this is just a why do men do this thread.

PS. I am sure women do this too, but I just want to understand why???? from a males point of view.

Thanks.

[2confusedd]

A few questions for guys who have "been confused" in a relationship before.

1. Why do men keep in contact with a girl, if they are confused in their relationship with them, i.e. "not 100% sure if this what he wants" etc.

2. Why say hurtful things like "I have a cold because of all the girls I kiss" and laugh?

3. Why (if you are confused) would you say, love you at the end of a conversation? and sometimes text miss you?

Just a few questions because this confuses me. I have a thread about my breakup (or lack thereof) but this is just a why do men do this thread.

PS. I am sure women do this too, but I just want to understand why???? from a males point of view.

Thanks.

1. because some men believe that even though they may be confused, they don't really see the need to end the relationship unless it's really necessary. maybe they just want to keep going until the girl herself has had enough and breaks up. they might also just be hoping that as time passes by, things will get better.

2. i don't know, i wouldn't say something like that.

3. because some men might be hoping that by saying or doing certain nice things, the girl will react to that and something might change for the better in his relationship with her. it's not that he doesn't mean what he says, but he's hoping that somehow, things will get better than they are at the moment.

[TAVS]

1. They only think they're confused. Fact is its not what he wants. Feels its better to have someone than noone... but still looking for Mrs right.
2. Hard to say without knowing the individual. I might say something like that, but thats my sick sarcastic humor. Fortunately my girlfriend has the same humor
3. See point 1

[Moe]

A few questions for guys who have "been confused" in a relationship before.

1. Why do men keep in contact with a girl, if they are confused in their relationship with them, i.e. "not 100% sure if this what he wants" etc.

If they still think they love you why would they break it off? I've never been in a relationship where love didn't rule.

2. Why say hurtful things like "I have a cold because of all the girls I kiss" and laugh?

I have never said a hurtful thing to a women I loved in my entire life.

3. Why (if you are confused) would you say, love you at the end of a conversation? and sometimes text miss you?

He still loves you I would think.

Just a few questions because this confuses me. I have a thread about my breakup (or lack thereof) but this is just a why do men do this thread.

PS. I am sure women do this too, but I just want to understand why???? from a males point of view.

Thanks.

If he loves you let time go it's way.
But make sure he's not playing games and checking others out.

[Roymax]

1. Why do men keep in contact with a girl, if they are confused in their relationship with them, i.e. "not 100% sure if this what he wants" etc.

Sometimes love can become an negative obsession that changes it's real meaning in a very bad way. That's not real love. This is really an unhealthy quality to have for any relationship. They want to keep their foot in the door as long as you will allow them to do so. This unhealthy obsessive kind of behavior can also lead to stalking or even worse. Ever watched the classic movie Fatal Attraction? it happens everyday...It will give you an idea what some people can do if the problem gets to that point but it's up to you to finally close that door. Don't lead him on and don't let him lead you on. Some guys will say anything...don't fall for it. Actions speak their true intentions my friend.

2. Why say hurtful things like "I have a cold because of all the girls I kiss" and laugh?

You say he was hurt in a previous relationship? He may be at the point where he doesn't care anymore (there are people like that out there) and is taking it out on you because of what happened to him in a previous relationship. He doesn't seem to care what you think or your hurt by it. Unfortunately, a person's emotional baggage will carry on from the previous relationship. It begins to build up over time if nothing is done about it. (you can't help him..he needs to get help) It does happen all the time but you became the victim here. He is indirectly being verbally abusive towards you by say those things. You don't need to listen to it anymore do you? This is not love

3. Why (if you are confused) would you say, love you at the end of a conversation? and sometimes text miss you?

Those words are an anchor trying to keep your mind locked on him...so far it seems he hasn't backed up those words so they're meaningless. I can say I love you Supernova but there's no meaning behind it...you see where I'm coming from? He's playing you big time

[Roymax]

You should check out hoggy's "4 years relationship ended for internet romance" thread in the Broken Hearts forum. He has been having problem similar to yours when it comes to his ex sending texts and calling while leading him on. It was driving him crazy...he's the man to talk to. He seems to be handling it better. I think it would be helpful if two can support each other while dealing with this problem.

[SirWagginston]

You're talking about two different general classes of dude, here.

1 & 3: Because we're stupid and we fall in love too easily. Get out of our heads!

2: Because some guys are mean. Either because they have emotional problems from being hurt in the past, or because they are just jerks.

[cmacattack1]

I don't see why we couldn't substitute women in the place of men in these questions.

We are all more or less the same in our behavior. You see the trends in these threads?

[Lite]

1) Comfort in what you're used to.
2) An attempt to look like they're moving on.
3) Habit and maybe to keep you strung along in case he doesn't find someone better.

[Supernova]

All the comments and interesting and I appreciate it. I totally agree, women can do this as well. I think the best thing to do (both men and women) in this situation, is dump their ass. I do believe if you are into someone you would behave this way. By the way, I have ended it and I feel relieved. There is someone better out there who deserve my full attention and love. Thanks guys!!!!!!
Again how do I close this thread??????