What do you think about the questions my ex asks me at work???

[starbuck]

DT, back away. You were just starting to get over this girl and now you're getting sucked back into the dramas.

This is the girl you work with right? I'm asking because there is no other reason I can think of that you haven't cut complete contact with her.

[thrillaveza]

Possibly...

She broke if off with me the first time because she wanted a break. I found a new girl, then she wanted me back. I dumped new girl and got back with the ex. Six weeks later she met another dude and dumped me again. Her and new dude have since broken up.

She was never a party girl in the least bit, now she's going out and getting wasted and got a second job as a cocktail waitress at an upscale bar. She's doing the party girl thing which is cool, but I have a feeling she still needs the support of a BF.

If she doesn't feel good or something is wrong...guess who she talks to at work about it. This is when she talks to me like we're still together. Instead of "I've got a stomach ache" its " My tummmyyy hurrrts". I dont want to be an ass and not be friendly to her, but I've been trying not to offer up "boyfriend like" support.

that's good that you aren't offering up boyfriend like support. i feel that when she found out you had a gf, she claimed interest in you again, cause of the whole someone else is paying attention to you (which is human nature, i suppose). though i'm only a spectator in this, in my point of view, i feel that it is kind of messed up that you left the other girl for your ex (to which she left you for another guy). but honestly try not to buy in to this, she is trying to get your attention and such like what a "supportive bf" would do. keep conversations straight to the point and such.

[abra kadabra]

Bottom like - do you want to start things up again?

[NeoSeminole]

I think it's irrelevant what your ex asked you. It's evident you still have feelings for her otherwise you wouldn't be trying to decode her words.

the question is: what are you going to do about it?

[Dogtoast]

Bottom like - do you want to start things up again?

I think it's irrelevant what your ex asked you. It's evident you still have feelings for her otherwise you wouldn't be trying to decode her words.

the question is: what are you going to do about it?

I'm in love with this girl....bottom line. Even with all the bullsh*t she's put me through, it can easily be chocked up to confusion on her part. We're both young (me 26 her 24) so its understandable. I've got 2 dates this weekend...both with really attractive, respectable girls. Guess who I'm thinking about though... my ex is always on my mind....always. It just doesnt hurt anymore like it used to. That all could change though if I get caught up in anything.

Yes we still work together. I see her every single day except weekends. This is how I've been noticing all this stuff she's doing. Her hinting on wanting to go out to eat a few nights ago, and me biting at the hint was exciting and it made me happy. Being with her makes me happy, and I think she feels the same. I'm not sure that I want to be back with her though, but I think I still love her. I know I have super strong feelings for her at the very least. Today I've cut off anything that can be misconstrued as anything other than work talk. She got the hint and is doing the same kinda, but only after my lead.

I just dont want to play games anymore...its getting very old...so I'm backing off.

I dont know what the next move is other than to just keep my distance I guess. Its hard when I know how I feel for her and she's been making advances. I dunno if she's doing it to make herself feel better or she wants to be back with me, or thats just her being friendly. I just dont know. Seems like advances though.

[NeoSeminole]

listen to me, you don't actually miss her. You miss the way you felt around her. There are girls out there who will make you feel even more amazing, but you will never get a chance if you keep thinking of your ex.

[Dogtoast]

listen to me, you don't actually miss her. You miss the way you felt around her. There are girls out there who will make you feel even more amazing, but you will never get a chance if you keep thinking of your ex.

You are probably right. Up til now she is the person who has made me feel the best. She was a great girl and I wanted to marry her. I have since forgiven her for the BS she put me through, but I need to not forget about it. I'm giving other girls a chance....but until I meet someone better than her, I'm gonna keep thinking about her, unfortunately.

Its just difficult because I see her every day. She's out sick today, and she literally called me 5 min ago to tell me about her doctors appointment. I think its about work so I answer...and she just goes straight into doctor talk. I dont want to be an ass to her and blow her off....because I need her to be on my side in our business relationship.

This is really, really, a touchy situation.

[shheadz]

Does she have many other friends? She could be lonely, and looking to the only place she knows for company.

[Dogtoast]

Does she have many other friends? She could be lonely, and looking to the only place she knows for company.

No, actually she doesnt have many friends at all. She is kind of a loner, she loves living alone and is very independent. Two different things I know, but still.

You could be onto something.

[NeoSeminole]

Dogtoast, stop trying to analyze her actions. This is exactly what she wants - for you to think about her - which so far, seems to be working.

[Dogtoast]

Every time she pops in my head I'm going to just push it right outta there. Sick of her playing her little games with me. I dont want to be friends with her, but I've got to be friendly because of the work situation.

She'll find another dude soon enough like last time, and she'll latch onto him for a few months and leave me alone. Like clockwork.

I just am not in a relationship mode right now...so I've still got lingering feelings for her.

I am getting kinda excited for my date tonight however...

[shheadz]

I work with my ex a couple nights a week, and she did all the same stuff you've described. Lots and lots of flirting, and mixed signals. It f'n sucked. See my post about her making it worse by being nice.

Eventually I had to just stop talking to her at work. It's the only thing that did the trick. I didn't talk to her, and I didn't even look at her. It's not exactly the same as completely getting the person out of your life, but it's the best thing you can do right now.

I went back and read your original breakup thread, but I don't know if you ever said whether she was still with that other guy. If she's not, then she's probably trying to do what she does best: Jump to another guy, even if that other guy is an old guy... you. Even if she's not looking for a romantic relationship with you, she is still jumping to a guy. And the worse thing about it? All the flirting and mixed signals will end the moment she finds someone else.

Don't play into her games. Don't get fooled by the flirting. Don't go out with her anymore. Don't be friends with her. She's not even friend material. She uses people, and she's using you. No one needs friends like that.

[Dogtoast]

I work with my ex a couple nights a week, and she did all the same stuff you've described. Lots and lots of flirting, and mixed signals. It f'n sucked. See my post about her making it worse by being nice.

Eventually I had to just stop talking to her at work. It's the only thing that did the trick. I didn't talk to her, and I didn't even look at her. It's not exactly the same as completely getting the person out of your life, but it's the best thing you can do right now.

I went back and read your original breakup thread, but I don't know if you ever said whether she was still with that other guy. If she's not, then she's probably trying to do what she does best: Jump to another guy, even if that other guy is an old guy... you. Even if she's not looking for a romantic relationship with you, she is still jumping to a guy. And the worse thing about it? All the flirting and mixed signals will end the moment she finds someone else.

Don't play into her games. Don't get fooled by the flirting. Don't go out with her anymore. Don't be friends with her. She's not even friend material. She uses people, and she's using you. No one needs friends like that.

No she's not with the other dude.....as SOON as she dumped him....all the flirting started. You are so absolutely 100% right about her its not even funny. She is so transparent. She jumped to me from her ex when we first got together years ago which I didnt like, but I took note of it.

You're right about her not even being friend material. I've seen how she's used her BEST FRIEND in the past. She's only friends when it benefits her. She's a fairweather friend.

I just can't seem to shake her when she calls/talks to me about non work related stuff. I've been giving one word answers and trying to be short with her....but its hard to not get sucked in because she is being sooo damnnn nice. I guess I'll just have to be more aware of it and make it akward for her.

[Dogtoast]

Last night she texted me asking about a work meeting she thought we had. Of course we didnt have any meeting. I asked her if she was feeling better and she said yes.

Then she said "I want sushi" which was her trying to feel me out. I didnt bite like I did the other night and just left it alone basically by saying "stop putting things in my head!". She didnt text me anymore after that. I'm sure me not taking her up on her wanting to get sushi will only fuel her fire.

She looks cute today as I've seen her already. She's wearing makeup which she never does... :rolleyes

[Dogtoast]

she doesnt like that I turned her down last night....she's being short and seems a little pissy today.