Does having a weird fetish ruin my chances?

[rin]

Sorry, but I just have to get this off my chest.

It seems as though there's always been this side of me that just wants to be in a romantic, loving, and "fun" relationship. Sort of like the stuff you see in romantic comedies, as cheesy as it sounds. Unfortunately, however, while I know the type of girl I'd love to date (and have even met a couple girls whom I would have gladly asked out if they weren't already in a relationship), there's a part of me that's a little nervous when it comes to asking girls out.

Oddly enough, though, my nervousness doesn't stem from shyness, fear of commitment, or a fear of rejection or any of the usual stuff. In fact, it's actually quite easy for me to talk to girls, even ones I have a crush on. However, my main problem is that I'm worried that once I do get in a relationship, I'll obviously have to "come out" to my partner about my fetish sooner or later. Perhaps I'm overreacting, but a part of me worries that once I tell a girl about it she'll think less of me.

Realistically, I wouldn't be able to hide it forever and there's that part of me that is kind of embarrassed about having this fetish. I understand a lot of it has to do with things like the girl's mood when I decide to tell her, how long we've been together, how much she loves me, what the fetish is, and countless other variables. What I'd like to know, however, is the average girl's reaction to my fetish. For some reason, I think it's cute and a huge turn on when girls fart near me.

Obviously this is something I'd wait at least a little while to mention in a relationship and I'd only tell a girl if I think she'd be comfortable with it and I wouldn't want to force her to do something she doesn't want to do, but I was just wondering if something like this is a deal breaker for girls. The hopeful part of me wants to believe since it's not really an outright dangerous fetish that girls would have moral qualms with, it should be rather easy (at least, in comparison to the more extreme fetishes) to convince a girl to fart near me and some girls might even appreciate the honesty of me "coming out" to her (after all, many girls like knowing what turns their boyfriend on anyway) and some may even use it as an excuse to stop holding it in near me. However, this other part of me worries that if I tell a girl about it, she'll think I'm gross, weird, some kind of pervert, or otherwise be completely put off by the idea altogether.

So basically I'd like to know whether or not you ladies out there would be put off by this fetish. Part (if not most) of me thinks I'm worrying over nothing and plenty of girls wouldn't mind this fetish since they have to fart anyway, but there's still that doubtful voice that tells me girls will hate it.

I apologize if this post seems a little incoherent in places since I'm tired at the moment. However, this is actually something I tend to wonder about and any answers would be greatly appreciated.

[TheWizard]

I think it's only gong to be very strange because it's the polar opposite of how women act and expect to act in society. It's not really that bad of a fetish, but your opponent is societies mold for women, not women themselves I think.

[SirWagginston]

Haha, I've never heard of a fetish like that. I'd bang you if I were a chick/homosexual.

[starbuck]

Yes, having a weird fetish does hurt your chances. Your fetish will be off-putting to most women.

I don't know if it's feasible for you, if you're in high school or what, but could you seek out a woman in a fetish community? Women in these communities tend to be more open-minded about weird stuff. Perhaps you could find a kindred spirit there.

[vashti]

Hahaha!!

Sorry, I wouldn't indulge your fetish.

Good luck.

[sookie6]

Are you for real?

[Button Moon]

Judging by some of my female friends (not talking about me of course :-) you probably wouldn't have to have it come out a fetish, your girlfriend might just do it around you anyway!

I know most women are a little curious when faring in front of their boyfriends, maybe just make it clear that it really doesn't bother you and that you would prefer it if she didn't hide it from you and just "let it out". When things get comfortable then she will probably be more easy about it.

As for telling her it is a fetish of yours - if its like a huge turn on, then I can understand that she might find it a bit weird. Like if my boyfriend told me he gets turned on when I go for a S*** I think that it would be a bit of a shock, but I guess I would learn to love him for it!

As long as someone is open minded enough, they shouldn't be but off if you're a nice guy and all, although I can understand if they are a taken a back by it, as it is a little unusual :-)

[rin]

Hahaha!!

Sorry, I wouldn't indulge your fetish.

Good luck.

Just out of curiosity, why wouldn't you? After all, it's not like it's anything I'm asking a girl to go out of her way for me since everyone farts every now and then and I'd basically just let her know I like it. I wouldn't even ask for it during sex or anything since my romantic side still enjoys things like kissing, hugging, and cuddling. I'm not really trying to change your opinion or anything, but I'd appreciate it if you elaborated what you don't like about it. Would you just feel gross or unladylike doing it or is there something else?

Yes, having a weird fetish does hurt your chances. Your fetish will be off-putting to most women.

I don't know if it's feasible for you, if you're in high school or what, but could you seek out a woman in a fetish community? Women in these communities tend to be more open-minded about weird stuff. Perhaps you could find a kindred spirit there.

The thing is, I'm legally old enough for that kind of thing (I'm 18 and I already graduated from high school), but that's just something I wouldn't really want to do. After all, to me, that kind of thing seems to accentuate the fetish part of the relationship, which, to me, seems very similar to having a relationship that revolves around sex. If anything, basing a relationship on things like fetishes will more than likely cause me to get blinded by lust and I'd really prefer a more romantic partner. I'd rather get to know someone before telling her about my fetish and there's just something weird about doing that sort of thing to me and I definitely couldn't feel proud of myself if I did that.

Are you for real?

Yes. Which is unfortunate, because it looks like I'm screwed.

Judging by some of my female friends (not talking about me of course :-) you probably wouldn't have to have it come out a fetish, your girlfriend might just do it around you anyway!

I know most women are a little curious when faring in front of their boyfriends, maybe just make it clear that it really doesn't bother you and that you would prefer it if she didn't hide it from you and just "let it out". When things get comfortable then she will probably be more easy about it.

As for telling her it is a fetish of yours - if its like a huge turn on, then I can understand that she might find it a bit weird. Like if my boyfriend told me he gets turned on when I go for a S*** I think that it would be a bit of a shock, but I guess I would learn to love him for it!

As long as someone is open minded enough, they shouldn't be but off if you're a nice guy and all, although I can understand if they are a taken a back by it, as it is a little unusual :-)

Finally a gleam of hope.

It's funny that you mention that one thing you said about making it clear farting doesn't bother me. That's actually how I have it sort of planned once I get in a relationship. I'd basically just wait for her to fart near me and once she does it, I'd tell her something along the lines of "that was kind of cute" or something else that would show I don't mind it and I'd try to tell her she doesn't have to worry about holding it in near me. Eventually, once she seems comfortable enough with farting near me, I'd tell her that I actually like it because at that point it would be much easier to tell her how much I like it.

Anyway, I don't really know whether to classify this as a "turn on" or a "huge turn on." Even though it turns me on, I also think it's very cute (then again, I've also always been the kind of guy that prefers "cute" to "sexy") and kind of funny, so something about it feels different than being turned on by other things. I'm not into the more extreme sides of this fetish, but I would basically love it if a girl wasn't afraid of farting near me and didn't feel the need to hold it in when she was near me.

Regarding your last paragraph, I consider myself to be a "nice guy" and a romantic boyfriend and all that and I actually thought about that before. Perhaps having those traits would make a girl more comfortable with farting for me, but judging by all these other replies I'm getting, that may not be the case.

[nicholarse]

I didn't think girls did fart? They only pee right?

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

I fart around (and on LOL) my bf all the time and vice versa, but if he got turned on by it I would be freaked out.

[fnatic]

I don't get it. do you get aroused by this or is it more like you want them to do that cause they shouldn't be embarrassed around you. so the question is does the act turn you on or does the feeling that she is totally comfortable around you turn you on?

I want the girl to be her self and therefore she can fart when I am around. Not because i am turned on by it but because i think the girl shouldn't have to be embarrassed around me.

i wouldn't like it if i see the girl go to another room or whatever and obviously showing that she would be embarrassed if she would do it in front of me.

i might be weird about this but i like the closeness to the other person and therefore nothing should be embarrassing to one another.

However, i do have to say this takes time, so in other words in a long term relationship and not in the beginning

[rin]

I don't get it. do you get aroused by this or is it more like you want them to do that cause they shouldn't be embarrassed around you. so the question is does the act turn you on or does the feeling that she is totally comfortable around you turn you on?

I want the girl to be her self and therefore she can fart when I am around. Not because i am turned on by it but because i think the girl shouldn't have to be embarrassed around me.

i wouldn't like it if i see the girl go to another room or whatever and obviously showing that she would be embarrassed if she would do it in front of me.

i might be weird about this but i like the closeness to the other person and therefore nothing should be embarrassing to one another.

However, i do have to say this takes time, so in other words in a long term relationship and not in the beginning

Yeah, this is definitely nothing I'd tell a girl about at the very beginning of our relationship. Like I said, I'd give it time. It would definitely hurt my chances if I bring it up really early on, as that's common sense. Perhaps it was because I was tired, but by the topic title I really meant something closer to "Do girls mind weird fetishes?" or something like that and like I said, I'm more of a long term relationship kind of guy anyway.

To answer your question, however, there's actually a combination of different things I like about this fetish. For example, some of it does have to do with the fact that I like seeing girls comfortable and I wouldn't want a girl to feel embarrassed near me, so if she farted near me without being nervous about it, I'd definitely like that. Something about a girl not worried about being herself near me, farts and all, is sort of romantic in a strange way. Some of it also has to do with the fact that it's relieving to the girl. I also have this thing where I really like it if she thinks farting is funny since there's just something adorable about girls laughing and smiling. However, the sound of a girl farting, funnily enough, is also attractive to me. If it's particularly loud and/or long, it's much more enjoyable to me. I don't necessarily like the smell, though. I can stand it as long as it isn't too bad, but it doesn't really do anything for me at all.

Also like I said earlier, being turned on by this seems different than the way most guys get turned on. After all, like I said, as well as being attractive to me, it's also funny and cute. Which, combined with my "nice guy" attitude means instead of it putting me in the mood for sex like fetishes normally seem to do, instead I would actually be more inclined to start hugging or cuddling her or some other nonsexual form of affection. Then again, perhaps that's because I actually tend to fantasize about cuddling more than sex anyway because that sort of contact just feels more meaningful to me. Don't get me wrong, it could still get me in the mood if I'm having one of those days, but it's more likely to make me want to instead initiate less sexual physical affection and/or a playful "that was cute" comment. It's hard to explain, but I'm sure you get what I mean. Which, I'd assume makes my fetish sound at least a little less freaky.

[vashti]

Just out of curiosity, why wouldn't you? After all, it's not like it's anything I'm asking a girl to go out of her way for me since everyone farts every now and then and I'd basically just let her know I like it. I wouldn't even ask for it during sex or anything since my romantic side still enjoys things like kissing, hugging, and cuddling. I'm not really trying to change your opinion or anything, but I'd appreciate it if you elaborated what you don't like about it. Would you just feel gross or unladylike doing it or is there something else?

Because my level of comfort is at least as important as yours, and I wouldn't feel comfortable doing in front of anyone. I associate passing gas with loss of sphincter control and old age, or just plain old bad manners.

Sorry.

[rin]

Because my level of comfort is at least as important as yours, and I wouldn't feel comfortable doing in front of anyone. I associate passing gas with loss of sphincter control and old age, or just plain old bad manners.

Sorry.

Yeah, I understand and like I said I wouldn't really try to pressure a girl into something like this if she was uncomfortable with it, I was just curious. Thanks for answering my question.

[SirWagginston]

Because my level of comfort is at least as important as yours, and I wouldn't feel comfortable doing in front of anyone. I associate passing gas with loss of sphincter control and old age, or just plain old bad manners.

Sorry.

Loss of sphincter control, really? Not only is it biologically natural, but I'm pretty sure it's also healthy to pass gas regularly.