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Thread: Girlfriend hided stuff before going out with me

  1. #1
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    Girlfriend hided stuff before going out with me

    okay i have a pretty weird story here.
    I knew this girl like 2 years ago through my bestfriend who started goin out with her at that time. while she was in a relationship, i was too. months ago, i broke up with my gf coz it wasnt working anymore.
    me and my bestfriend's gf became very very close friends. n we fell in love with each others. to me, she was this perfect girl, i saw in her all that i wanted in a girl. guess she felt the same too coz it took us some days of intimate talking, till one night we kissed, she broke up with her boyfriend the next day.
    to understand my problem, i have to say why i loved this girl: for her personnality thats awsome, shes too funny and she told me, as friends, that she was a virgin (okay, maybe i dont care about that, but the fact that she didnt have 20 boyfriends before n shes still sexually ''clean'' made me love her more).
    After goin out with her, i found out shes not a virgin, she has a lot of sexual experience but thats only with her ex so one guy. she explained why she lied and got me convinced. til now its ok.
    Then she told me stuff like shes tried weed before (which she has never told me before either, then stuff like givin bjs to all of her ex's.. 5 guys). ok all of this happened and was finished since 2-3 yars and when it happened she had abt15-18 years old. now shes 4-5 years older. she says its a black past that she put in a box that she threw deep deep inside her and never wanted to open it again coz she hates it. I admit that i was a bit pushing and made her tell me all of this coz i couldnt get my mind clear on the things she did or might have done.

    ill talk about me: im more of a possessive and conservative guy, though i drink, go out,have fun and stuff, but m sexually open. what i hate is drugs, i hate cheapness n i find that what she did during her past (especially weed, bjs and stuff like that) was really cheap. shes changed in my point of view, i cant see her as perfect as before. i have a lot to give, respect, money, etc. im handsome, im funny n m smart n m good in bed too. m not trying to talk abt myself here or being arrogant but m just thinkin if i deserve to be with her or should i let her go and stop waistin her time coz the stuff i knew is eatin me out.

    okay whats bad in this relationship:
    - first of all, i ****ed my friend by takin his girlfriend
    - this girl hided stuff on me which I consider lying (well, not really hided, she had other wrong versions of what she said)
    - she has a dark past and I dont like that )especially that I didnt know that)
    Last edited by tonymontana1; 17-01-10 at 01:56 AM.

  2. #2
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    Okay, so you're not feeling her anymore since she confessed things in her past to you. She doesnt appear as "perfect" to you as before. Let me tell you, the ladies on this board are gonna tear you a new one my friend. I think its kinda messed up she wasnt truthful with you about some thing, but we all have a past buddy, she's not perfect and niether are you. You're gonna be really disapointed if you going through life looking for lil mis perfect because she doesnt exist.

    You need to calm down and reevaluate the way you're looking at this girl. She's no different than the girl you feel in love with. So she tried weed, most people do. Its all in the past though. You have some personal issues you need to work out with yourself guy.

  3. #3
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    Okay, here's my 2 cents.. sorry to sound harsh, but I'm saying what I think you need to hear. You're a real hypocrite. You spent an entire paragraph talking about how great you are, but all I see is a guy that's full of flaws judging someone else for their flaws. You clearly have a sexual history, but you're bashing her for having one. You stole a friend's girlfriend, and then bash her for smoking a bit of pot in her past. I'm sure you were hiding your budding romance for this girl from your friend, which is the same as lying, but you're bashing her for lying. You're clearly an imperfect person getting mad because she's not perfect. Deal with it.
    The secret of success is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake those, you've got it made. - Groucho Marx

  4. #4
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    thanks guys for the lecture but i wasnt tryin to sound hyppocrite or something, maybe u got me wrong.
    Yeah i know i lied to my friend by doing this, and she lied too. this is not the point. I didnt care about all this coz i understand why she did it. What I am saying is: she told me stuff before we were together that were wrong. she told she was a virgin. did I say I hate that shes not a virgin? NO. the problem is that she lied. she didnt need to. yes I have a sexual history myself, n m not sayin she shouldnt have one. I understand that. but the fact that she lied about all that is not very cool.
    the thing abt weed, excuse me but she ddnt just try weed before, she smoked it for as long as 4 years. she was never an addict but she did that. did I? NO, i never did even ''try'' it.
    what m saying is that i was honest and clear abt myself and who I am since the beginning, if she asked sthg i would anwer honestly. abt my sexual experiences, ive never lied. but she did. abt weed, i didnt lie (well, ive never tried it), but she did.
    does anyone understand that this is not about wether she has sexual history or not. its about lying , hiding and makin m love smn for not who she is.

    i would appreciate some constructive point of views and not attacks guys, thank u

    oh and btw, dont tell me its impossible to find a perfect girl, it is. I was with one myself and we had to break up because of how hard our long distance relationship was.anyway.
    Last edited by tonymontana1; 17-01-10 at 05:44 AM.

  5. #5
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    She lied to you, plus she is really mixed up. This is not the kind of girl you want to be with. Can you trust her anymore? because trust is a huge factor in successful relationships.

  6. #6
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    who did u think you were dating, mother theresa?..

  7. #7
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    guys, the hard thing is that i know this girl since about 2 years and she seems to be a good girl and a nice person. my question is: could a girl whos been bad in the past turn good and stay good?
    I dont believe in the concept of bad girls turning good. what d u think?

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