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Thread: Am I really that easy?

  1. #1
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    Am I really that easy?

    I never thought that I was easy. I've always considered myself pretty picky when it comes to guys.

    I've written a few posts about this guy before. We met, sparks flew, we were long distance (different countries in fact) but we talked every day for 3 months. Then he met someone else and we stopped talking. He wanted to remain friends but I didn't want to be "back-pocket" girl so I backed off. On x-mas we wished each other a happy holiday and started talking a bit. He had a lot of questions most of them surrounding the details about the guys I'm seeing now. He tried to go back to the way we were before but I was clear that it wasn't a go.

    Then today I receive a package at work. He sent me my favorite candy from his country.

    I melted. I felt all warm and happy and giddy and STUPID. I know a part of it is the fact that I still really like this guy and I've been trying to protect myself by fighting my feelings and staying away. But really, sweets?! Is that all it takes to win back my affections and make me forget his crazy ways? I'm kind of disappointed in myself.

    ~ Laila

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    Oh.. he's good.

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    IndiReloaded is offline Yawning
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    A polite thank you is appropriate but stay aloof without more direct communication from him.
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

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    It's not how you feel about an attempt to get you back on the hook that matters, it's how you respond.

    I think we all have those moments when our wishes and hopeful hearts overpower our sanity. As long as we allow ourselves to just feel that moment, and not act on it, its ok. Have your weak mushy moment now, but get your spine of steel back in action the next time you chat with him.

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    Quote Originally Posted by shheadz View Post
    Oh.. he's good.
    He sure is!

    You should thank him for the sweets, and respond in a way that forces him to reveal his motive in sending them. I'm too drunk right now to provide an example for you to paraphrase, sorry. At the least, though, your message should acknowledge that he remembers your interests, and inquire into what's on his mind these days.

    I think, however, that our advice would be more helpful if we knew what country this male is from. I can see that you are American, but it makes a big difference whether the guy is from Canada, Mexico, or someplace far removed.

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    So, LK, what kind of sweets do you like? I'll send you TWO boxes, and then we will see if you like me TWICE as much as him> LOL

  7. #7
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    Everyone is easy for SOMEONE.

    Try to do what your intelligence tells you, and not your heart. Your heart will betray you.

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    He's from freaking Germany. Freaking far away.

    My intelligence tells me that it was a sweet but easy thing for him to do. It doesn't mean I'm anything other then the girl he keeps in his back pocket to bang when he gets to the States.

    The girly stupid side of me (my heart) isn't saying anything but "Awwwwwwwwwww..."

    Ugh.

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    Test him. Act like you're all in, totally swooning for him and see if he cools off again.

    That will be interesting, definitely.
    Spammer Spanker

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    He's from Germany? No wonder...

    Chances are, you may not have "melted" for him specifically, but for the gesture. It's nice to feel loved... even if you don't necessarily feel or want to feel love toward a particular person.

    As someone else had said... regain your spine. Don't dwell too much on such feelings or shortcomings -- stay the course. The only thing that really matters are your actions. What are you going to do?
    "The weakest soul, knowing its own weakness, and believing this truth that strength can only be developed by effort and practice, will, thus believing, at once begin to exert itself, and, adding effort to effort, patience to patience, and strength to strength, will never cease to develop, and will at last grow divinely strong."

    - James Allen

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    LK, stay away from Germans, they are the sneakiest people in the world.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Perryville View Post
    LK, stay away from Germans, they are the sneakiest people in the world.
    I'm not sneaky... *gives the saddest puppy dog look*... honest.
    "The weakest soul, knowing its own weakness, and believing this truth that strength can only be developed by effort and practice, will, thus believing, at once begin to exert itself, and, adding effort to effort, patience to patience, and strength to strength, will never cease to develop, and will at last grow divinely strong."

    - James Allen

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    Hey! Where's my wallet?
    Spammer Spanker

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gigabitch View Post
    Hey! Where's my wallet?
    Not a clue... but thanks for the car!
    "The weakest soul, knowing its own weakness, and believing this truth that strength can only be developed by effort and practice, will, thus believing, at once begin to exert itself, and, adding effort to effort, patience to patience, and strength to strength, will never cease to develop, and will at last grow divinely strong."

    - James Allen

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    My ex is a Kraut, she and her family are the most arrogant, backbiting people on the planet. They wouldn't steal your car, they would try to foreclose on your mortgage, just so they could kick you and your kids out into the street. Awful people!!

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