Can you evaluate my odd relationship situation

[Notches_Former]

So I've known this girl since last fall. Met at school, became good friends. I had a girlfriend and at times it would seem as if she was REAALLYY interested in me, but I would use humor or gay jokes to ease things (yeah, weird, i know). She probably didn't know I was taken as my girlfriend was in another city. Well my girlfriend moved back home and my friendship with um, I'll call her Tic Tic kind of dithered as it was impossible for us to have close friendship considering how hurt and jealous it would make my girlfriend.

Long story short: I kind of avoided Tic Tic for the sake of my relationship and hadn't heard or seen her in months until we bumped into each other and talked.

Now I desperately want her. She's exactly what I'm looking for and just being around her is a pleasure. She's the independent type that relies on no one and I love that.

My girlfriend and I have been together for going on two years. It's becoming too much for me to handle as she is incredibly clingy, jealous, and just depressing. I've tried so many times to work things out for the sake of us but I can't hold out much longer with her and will have to break the bad news to her soon unfortunately.

Meanwhile Tic Tic knows how things are going between the girlfriend and I and we've become a lot closer. I think it's mostly to due to my romantic feelings for Tic Tic. We talk on the phone for hours, she calls at 3am because she can't sleep, go to parties together, movies, sit and talk for hours, she drives to my house with no gas in her car just to spend time with me, did I mention we talk everyday? I'm thinking about calling her now.
Everyone thinks we're a couple minus us.

Despite what I mention above I'm not sure if Tic Tic sees me as strictly a friend and really just likes me on that level and nothing more. A week or so ago I told her how I feel; "i have feelings for you, blah blah blah". I was pretty much rejected. We've kind of been closer since oddly enough. And honestly I'm not sure if I was rejected so much as she didn't know how to respond and it was kind of out of the blue AND she didn't know if I was joking or serious(we joke a lot about serious issues). Or maybe I'm wrong about that last part and tell that to myself to sleep better at night.

Any-who's, Tic Tic has been acting more affectionately towards me since I spilled my heart. Little things like her starring at me with huge bright eyes and her just being closer in all aspects.

This is getting kind of long-winded and sappy; but do you guys think Tic Tic and I stand any chance. I'm honestly confused and don't know what to make out of our situation. She told me her plans for New Years and mentioned 'I have a really pretty dress and I want you to be there' (she to shy to say that, but that's what was implied). I know me having a girlfriend is the reason she can't connect. I don't know what I'm saying anymore.

HELP!!!

Me 23; Tic Tic: 23; GF; 22

[Spring Haze]

Break up with your girlfriend and get it over with.

A week or so ago I told her how I feel; "i have feelings for you, blah blah blah". I was pretty much rejected. We've kind of been closer since oddly enough. And honestly I'm not sure if I was rejected so much as she didn't know how to respond and it was kind of out of the blue AND she didn't know if I was joking or serious(we joke a lot about serious issues). Or maybe I'm wrong about that last part and tell that to myself to sleep better at night.

Or it's due to the fact that you still have a girlfriend. You're lucky this girl even continues on with you. She doesn't sound all that independent if she's allowing you to string her along.

Not that you care, but you are emotionally cheating on your girlfriend while leading another girl on. Until you break up with her, this is all it is - you leading her on.

do you guys think Tic Tic and I stand any chance.

Not if you keep dragging your feet by stringing two girls along.

[Cbrider]

It doesn't matter one way or another what you do or do not have with Tic Tic.

Deal with the girl at hand. You have already gone behind your current gf's back, be a man and do the right thing before you think about the next step. Its not fair to her.

[Notches_Former]

Breaking up with my girlfriend is complicated. When I proposed we take a break from our relationship while we were in different cities she threatened to kill herself and didn't attend class for a week. I really do care about her well being and safety, moreso than pursing my interest with my friend. You're absolutely right that I've been dragging my feet though.

You're also right about me emotionally cheating.

Tic Tic is a very independent girl though. Great esteem, positive outlook, comfortable with herself, knows who she is, intelligent, emotionally stable, financially situated, great future ahead of her, ect.

That's why I question whether she really is interested in me or if I'm just a really close friend to her.
She is too smart to be strung along. She even said "I will never play a part in breaking your girlfriends heart".

[Spring Haze]

Oh brother. Hightail it out of there and leave your girlfriend asap. Don't fall for this crap that she'll kill herself. That is a means of control and shows how desperate she is.

This is what you do -- break up, and if she makes that threat again, call authorities and notify them that she is a danger to herself.

[Cbrider]

She is too smart to be strung along. She even said "I will never play a part in breaking your girlfriends heart".

She already did play a part and she knows it. You might think about adding "manipulative" to Tic Tic's resumè. I am not so sure that YOU aren't the one being strung along here.

None of Tic Tic's behavior adds up.

Humans are designed to survive and persist, your girlfriend will make it. Its probably better for her to not have attachment anyway because it hinders possible self growth when there is always an outlet.

[Notches_Former]

Right again.

The thought of telling her 'it's over' causes me nothing but stress. She'll come over non-stop crying, call my house a billion times, maybe even attack me.

It's pretty scary.

I'm also concerned about her parents. It will kill them to see her in such a condition.

[Notches_Former]

None of Tic Tic's behavior adds up.

I know right?

And she can be quite manipulative. God she's awesome.

I am not so sure that YOU aren't the one being strung along here.

Hmmm. Care to explain?
She only gets as close as I allow given I'm with someone. I explain how things are going downhill with the girlfriend and Tic and I get closer.

It would be fascinating if she was doing the leading.

[Notches_Former]

Whelp. Broke up with her. She threatened suicide and tried to wreck my car. She also said she would stop taking birth control which scared the hell out of me.

Disturbing, but I can honestly say I'm happy its done.

She sent me an email apologizing about her reaction. Her biggest hump is "How can I be happy without you?". That's exactly the reason I can't be with her.