is my gf cheating on me?

[Yducky]

Hey, I am new here and I am in need of someone to talk to or for someone to listen.

Not sure if this is the right place to post, but recently, I have found out my current gf has been txting this guy 20+ times a day for the last 2 weeks and ongoing. (it was after we had a massive argument, took a break but then 5 days later, back together)

I questioned her about it, but whenever I do, she goes mad and tells me to shut up and how they're friends.
We live 3hrs away from each other, but this guy lives 10 mins away from her.

Whether it's flirty, dirty or normal texts(which i don't know), it hurts me so much. She blocked my views on fb so I can't see wall to wall messages, we don't talk as much now, maybe 40mins a day if im lucky (every night when she sleeps)

I just don't know what to do. I just feel my heart is broken.

[misombra]

whether she's cheating on you or not, she's not being very nice. it's all about what you're willing to tolerate? are you willing to tolerate being treated like a tool?

[kai]

Get rid of her as fast as you can. And then don't regret it.

[Yducky]

but I love her so much, and I can't seem to pull away from her.... I don't know how to

She is my 1st real relationship, and we've been together for 1.7 years.

What would you suggest?

[jc123]

i'm sorry to hear you're feeling upset. i believe she may have found someone else but she is being cowardly and deceitful by not telling you. her behaviour is suspicious and the way she is putting you off and arguing with you most likely mean she is hiding something. a g/f wouldn't block their own b/f from seeing her wall on fb. if she has blocked you she could be being very open on her wall and being very blatant about it. so it is likely that all her friends can see her wall and probably already know what you haven't been told-that she's with someone else. personally, i think you should dump her immediately.

[lostwithyou]

Be a man and stand your ground, don't be her little puppy, walk away and don't look back. Show her you're a man and you don't tolerate this BS.

It hurts but you have to man up.

[Perryville]

Clearly, whether she is cheating on you or not, she is disrespecting you , big time. You have two valid choices, 1) dump her 2) continue to be her pu**y boy, and take it.

[kai]

First relationship always sucks. Don't worry. You'll find a lot of better girls. Don't talk to her! Move on buddy. Grow some balls.

[Yducky]

anyway of salvaging my relationship? or do you guys think its at a loss?

Thank you to all of your insite, its been very helpful, but as we all know, words are easier said than done.

Maybe I should write her a letter? explaining my situation?

[kai]

Don't do anything like that!!! I'm telling you from my own experience. You can read others' posts, too. They all did the same thing. Tried to contact their ex, tried to get back together, wrote letters and what not.

Just don't bother. Nothing's gonna change now. But I know you will do it so I can't do anything.

[jc123]

don't write a letter. not a good idea. there is no way of salvaging this. i'm almost certain she's having an affair. it is a loss for sure. it's always tough when your first relationship ends. the feeling of that kind of rejection are new but you can gain some satisfaction of out of doing the right thing by dumping her. she deserves to be dumped after her behaviour. you need to dump her a.s.a.p. don't leave it for days, weeks, etc. she may end up getting to do it first. not that it's a competition but the least she deserves is to be dumped for her actions. there are much better and honourable women out there and you have plenty of time to find the right woman.

[Perryville]

Duck , you are evading an unpleasant task. Nop letter, no e-mail, no text, do what you have to do , face to face. Your self-respect and manhood are at stake here. If you let her continue to disrespect you, even if she's not having an affair now, she will in the future , because she will think of you as a doormat. Time to put on your big-boy pants.

[lostwithyou]

Sorry dude, here is my 2 cent and i'm not going to sugar coat it

don't waste your time, Fcuk it! move on take this time to heal yourself make yourself better. I promise you someone is out there for you.

[Yducky]

guys, I wrote a goodbye letter, good idea?

the ???? are names btw

When we first met, we were so vibrant, I felt so full of life, a breath of fresh air. You took me out of my confusion, my gloom
and turned it into something so surreal.... you made me happy, the happiest I have ever been.

In such a short time, you became literally my best friend, someone I could talk to, you would listen to me and not only listen you would participate and talk me through things giving me helpful comforting advice.
You was something special, ????. Our friendship became something on cloud 9 for me. I felt like you was my soulmate, that it was me and you against the world. I put you and I on a pedestal, feeling nothing could drive us apart and hurt us, that we would remain together for a long time. This led to me falling IN love with you, madly, truely and very deeply, I gave you my whole.

With things progressing slowly in the right direction, things took a drastic downfall with petty arguements and lies, I never once hid anything from you, I never even lied to you, but it was that one incident that hurt me so much, more than any pain I have felt. I remember that fateful night when I saw ?????'s inbox name, and it wasn't his inbox that hurt me, because I trusted
you, it was what you said afterwards, the horrible feeling that the person you love the most lies in front of your face. You kept saying it was ???? over and over again when clearly it wasn't, despite you begging and promising on everyones life that it was him......but we both knew it wasn't.

After that night, I know you two have been texting each other 15-20 times a day which confuses me, as your best friends such as ????, ????, ????, ???? etc do not vigriously text you that much and you do not to them throughout the day. I believe you may have found something in ???? and you are being cowardly and deceitful by not telling me.Whether you are cheating on me or not, you do not respect me, whether im willing to tolerate this hidden agenda of yours I don't think I can anymore.

I have changed myself for you, I was liking this new me, but then, finding out about your texts, knowing you hide things from me is rather suspicious. The way you put off when I ask or mention and arguing, also stopping me from seeing wall-wall posts means one thing, you are likely to be hiding something hurtful from me.

So my decision is made, I have decided I will move on with my life, but if you truely do love me, you would fight for me like how you used to..... I will be waiting, but not for long. I am learning to move on for now.

Love, ????

[kai]

Good lord. Don't send this please! This is a disaster.