Do you want to know what your significant other has done? How many sexual Partners?

[stevie1988]

When entering a new relationship do you typically discuss how many partners each has had? Or what kinds of things have you experienced? Kinky ect... Would you want to know? Or is it better left unsaid?

[wipe_out]

I would say it depends on how secure you are..

Some don't like what they hear and can't get over it others are fine..

[stevie1988]

Well, in my case it really bothered me and I can't seem to get over it. She has lived with 4 different men. It just bothers me.

[girl68]

So Stevie, for you, you have learned- YOU should never, ever ask. I'm also the same way. I asked, I couldn't handle the truth; I ask NO MORE.

I do like to know the number though, and somewhat the circumstances, but I never ask more (anymore).

If you try hard enough, you will get past it, I suspect you're just dwelling on it though- much like I did, until I realized tough shit! What's whining going to do? Erase it? Not a chance. Get over it or leave her. There is no "but".

[Petit Papillon]

I just know that my beloved bf had definately less sexual partners than my ex. AND THANK GOD , I hate men-whores.

[lilly1185]

I'd prefer to just have papers stating they are clean.

I don't mind passing back and fourth the topic of what have you's and what haven't you's, it's just a little more irksome when I can begin to dot the lines later on to what you've done with whom.

One thing to keep in mind, is s/he is with you, not with them. They had a fall out and it worked to your benefit. So what if she's done xyz that you haven't done; give her the leash and let her teach you :3

[Petit Papillon]

One thing to keep in mind, is s/he is with you, not with them. They had a fall out and it worked to your benefit. So what if she's done xyz that you haven't done; give her the leash and let her teach you :3

Naaah sometimes such thinking pushes You in asshole's arms . You should always have opened eyes.

[lilly1185]

Naaah sometimes such thinking pushes You in asshole's arms . You should always have opened eyes.

Baaaaaw, I'm saying have FUN. Do the normal relationship thing and if someone is just too freaky or controlling to handle don't hesitate to wave bye-bye.

I've racked up a total count of 13. It doesn't make me slutty, and I've done a LOT of things (some not so proud of...) and can tell you if I like 'em or not. Being in a relationship is an experience and if someone brings certain kinks they've acquired from other places, it just means it gets them off and it's something you can take and put your own personal spin on.

Then if it doesn't work out, you got a new trick to try on a new bedmate.

[Petit Papillon]

Actually I have no straight opinion on that...
On one side it's disgusting for me...On the other side I want to belive in people ,but the facts are , such people barely change.

[CocoChanel]

If you are dealing with a person who YOU believe is going to answer the question HONESTLY and YOU don't really want to know the truth... don't ask.

[Only-virgins]

****, this debate again. The relationship "past" thing one of the mods should find the best and longest thread and sticky that bitch so these threads don't pop up each week.

I want to know the past. It may or may not alter my decision of being with the person. If you can't handle the truth don't ask but don't lie about yours either. It is that simple really.

If you are dealing with a person who YOU believe is going to answer the question HONESTLY and YOU don't really want to know the truth... don't ask.

Are you saying the truth is always that bad?

[tokyojoe]

The problem is, some people won't answer honestly.

Most guys exaggerate, most girls do the opposite.

I did it too, added on one extra person when my girlfriend first asked.

She has also lied about it, and now it's anyone's guess what the true number is.

Same with experiences - it is easy to talk about in the beginning, but as feelings develop nobody really wants to think of the person they love doing stuff with other people.

In conclusion, some people need to know, others can't handle knowing, and too many lie about what they did anyway.

[Krissykris]

Oh yah I like to know! SO I won't do the same! hahaha. I actually feel less insecure and jealous when I know about my bf's past, I think if the person is okay to talk about a past sex partner then they're over them and being upfront and honest with the person infront of them. My experience anyways, I think everyone is different though.

[IndiReloaded]

I want to know the past. It may or may not alter my decision of being with the person. If you can't handle the truth don't ask but don't lie about yours either. It is that simple really.

^Ditto. Who you were IS a reflection of who you are. I wouldn't ask in early days, but if I'm considering a relationship with someone I want to know about past relationships and what happened. I think you can learn a lot about someone by how they treated their exes. If they are uncomfortable discussing it, that would likewise affect my opinion of them.

No different from a job interview, really.

[bluesummer]

I don't see why it matters if they make you happy and they're not carrying any diseases.

I never ask, and I don't tell unless asked.