What makes women....

[Bumble_bee]

Unapproachable?

what holds you guys back from approaching a woman?

I'm getting to thinking it can't be all about a guys nerves, maybe its the way some women carry themeselves, the way they look, talk etc.... sometimes I wonder what it is about me that stops guys from coming up to me and trying to have a conversation with me, or even asking me out.....

[Chupacabras]

Simple fear of rejection, that's usually it. Everything you list goes back to that.

It's so easy to dispel, too; make eye contact and smile, that's always enough for me!

[Bumble_bee]

well I guess so, the thing is from a far they show interest, smiles, asking about me to others, but never approach me....

was just wondering if there were other reasons aside form nerves that stop guys approaching me

[Chupacabras]

So far as I can tell you're a pretty girl, so chances are it's just nerves.

[Bumble_bee]

thanks Chupa

[Primo]

So many variables BB, it's hard to say. Personalities vary so much, some people there's eye contact, a little flirting and next thing you know you're having coffee at the cafe :-) Some people see each other, make eye contact, are dying to talk to each other but both play it cautious for fear of rejection and never talk :-P

[flea]

it can be other simple (even unintentional) things like, have you ever heard about someone else's view on something and thought less of them because of it? like if someone you hardly knew but was a friend of a friend was a racist and those kind of people aren't your cup of tea?

I'm waffling a little, but my point is, I wouldn't take it personally. I think Primo has a good point: a little positive interaction between yourself and someone you think might be ok is always a good start (smiles, eye contact, etc.). kind of like a pre-ice breaker, if you know what I mean.

[davidtorres]

They are all wuss. Sometimes its hard to overcome fear if the girl is hot. Show some more hints that youre interested. Smile back and move away from your group so if you are in a set so he wouldnt be too intimidated.

[Primo]

I thought France is full of passionate lovers BB? That's my American guy image of it :-)

[Bumble_bee]

well I havnt been here for that long, and I'm not sure I'm even looking for something (urghh how does that make me sound) guess I'm just an attention seeking whore...

but you know I've been concentrating on my studies and my little boy for so long, I just looked up one day and realised that I dnt even get that many offers...bit sad really. I'm not bad looking, I keep myself in shape, I'm social...but I'm crap with the eye contact thing....I flirt outragously when I'm surrounded by my circle, but outside it I'm like this rabbit in a big field.

I dnt know.....I just need a bit of guy attention....just to get me started, and I can usually kick the rest off, but if I'm not even getting that, what should I do?

a few of my guy friends said I was intimidating? and I don't even know what they meant by that.....

[Chupacabras]

Ah, you need what guys call a "slump-buster".

[Bumble_bee]

''slump-buster''? whats that then?

[Chupacabras]

Well, when guys do it, they generally chase a woman that's below them to rebuild their confidence and put the smell of woman back on them. This "breaks the slump" so they can start going after women that are more appropriate. There are some really negative readings of that term, too, depending on who you talk to.

I'm not exactly sure how a woman would do it though.

[Bumble_bee]

oh Chupa, I'm far too nice to be doing that sort of stuff.....

[flea]

little boy...so you have a son? right or wrong that can be a deal breaker for many. some may even assume that seeing as you have a child that you have someone already, and won't initiate because of it.