Want a Second Chance...

[Moe]

Ok try to make this short.
Been Dating this women for three years, never a fight , argument, nothing. It was a dream relationship. One night we love you good night the next morning she wants out.
Ok I hounded her for the first 3-5 day needing to know why, I smothered her. Yet every time we spoke it was I love you and miss you. I did a week with out contact, we never raised our voice once in 3 years I got mad when she wouldn't give me any answers and raised my voice slightly and said what the hell if you don't love me tell me and I'll be gone forever she said I can't do that.
I said this is it no contact again and she called nearly every day for the next week and a half. She said they were some of the best conversations we ever had, great right. Well Friday we talked from nine O'clock in the morning till seven at night and she got into what I think of her and I said I don't want to go there and she continued until I told her again I l love you to death and she knew this. I asked why she had to ask and she said she needed it to be honest and from me. I never lied to this women in my life. So I reversed it and asked her the same thing ans she said she still loved me. I will not call her and it's been 2 days and she hasn't contacted me. We have six kids between us and she even allowed me to take her kids out the other night, we had a blast. Last Thursday she stopped by with somethings for my kids and I gave her note admitting to being a butt-head the first few days and told her that I agree with the break up for now so she can have some time to herself and to enjoy it. Her response was this means more to me then anything in the world and we hugged and she left, her one son wouldn't leave he wanted to stay with us, she had to yell to get him to leave.
There were two reasons for the breakup she said she changed because she allowed me to do things for and I had her on a pedestal, well hell she was awesome.

What does she want from me and how long before I should contact her?
We love each to death and I want this to work out in the worse way.

[marshawna1]

it sounds like shes looking for something, she dosent know what it is exactly but it sounds like she needs to date around and find out more about herself as a person to really determine where she is at with your guys relationship..she probably just has been doubting alot of things and dosent quite know where your guys relationship is headed, just give her, her time and focus on yourself also and let her call you when she is ready but if it more than a week and a half before she calls i would start mingling around or go out with friends just in case..

[Gigabitch]

Never a fight? That's not normal.

[Moe]

Never a fight? That's not normal.

Not even the slightest disagreement. That's why I'm stumped !!
The closest we ever came was she had relatives visiting that stresses her beyond believe and I backed off, just watched for the week. When they left she asked why I was distant and I told her you were stressed and I didn't want to interfere she said I always get that way when their here and she apologized and that was it. The only time I ever raised my voice and it barely was two weeks ago when I asked her if she loved me or not.

[Gigabitch]

I think I would feel abandoned if my boyfriend backed off when I was stressed. It would send a message that he didn't want to deal with problems, just wanted me to keep them to myself.

Red flag, to me.

[Moe]

She has had many stressful situations in the years we've been together, with 6 kids between us, work her Ex. my Ex. and so on and I've always been there for her. It's just with these particular relatives they are off limits to me, I explained and she knows it. So one time in three years I don't think that would matter much, she actually apologized to me.

I think I would feel abandoned if my boyfriend backed off when I was stressed. it would send a message that he didn't want to deal with problems, just anted me to keep them to myself.

Red flag, to me.

[Gigabitch]

The point I'm trying to make here is that it doesn't sound like you were very close.

[Moe]

Ok here's to nothing, been doing N/C, it's very hard because all our kids go to same schools so we wave and say hello that's it. No conversation in weeks. The last time she seen me to talk she nearly jumped out of her shoes to say whats up but I cut it short and moved on.
She has been hard trying to ignore me lately totally and I really don't care it's for the better for me. Instead of waiting for her kids now she makes them wait and just shows to get them so there's no chance to even talk.

I never talked to anyone about are break up so no one really knows.
I ran into an older friend of ours last week and I figure she told him the story of our break-up and he said she confided in him that we were going to work it out. Well she could of fooled me. LOL
Also she said she is trying to not see or talk to me but can't get me out of her head and still loves me, well why would she be trying to do this if she wanted to work it out or is she blowing smoke you know where. Still confused.

[RepeatingShot]

She broke up with you because you had her on a pedestal?

Some women are just freaking stupid.

[Moe]

Maybe my faith in JC has a lot to do with my feelings but why would some one who loves, can't get you out of her mind, is trying to stay away from you because they may change their mind not want to work things out.
Love is not easy and takes work, it seems she doesn't want to work on it. And yes I had her on a pedestal.
The few times we did talk I don't think she likes me having my confidence back or the fact I will not allow anyone to walk all over me. She has been respecting me again when we do talk, she just doesn't cut me off or take off during a conversation.

[Moe]

Well we haven't talked other then a wave lately as I said above. Two weeks. I've always been the type of person that when things end it's over and I'll never see or talk to you again. But this women I love to death still but I'm moving on, I'm in training again, I get out and moving on with my kids. She now knows this just by our last conversation I could tell she was a little harsh but respectful. I'm no longer a sap so to speak.
I told her for the second time I wanted to exchange all our personal belonging as well as everything she ever gave me (all in several boxes waiting to go).and she would never hear from me again and don't call, talk or run into me, and yes there's a ton, a P/U truck load both ways. She won't even change the pass words on her personal accounts, I don't want the responsibility of knowing them.
WHY if she doesn't want to be bothered?
She either says why do you want to do that or agrees and doesn't show.
Although I love her and she loves me I can't be hung out to dry like a door mat.
I feel so bad for her kids because they love me and anytime they see me they run to me and won't go to her, she has to threaten them to go with her, the last two times it was a seen with the youngest crying to stay with me.

[Moe]

I think my Ex. needs help. She won't allow me to get over her.
We have to occasionally pass each other due to kids. I will usually just wave but lately been trying to avoid her at all cost. Last week I seen her parked in the lot and went to every length to avoid her,
I drove to the other end of the lot and parked behind a slew of buses, she drove out of her way just to pull in front of me and wave like a nut and I just waved and drove away.
We owed each other money months ago and we squared up and she won't cash the check that I've asked her to several times.
On Thursday after asking her for months to contact my daughter and her refusing to do so she calls and asks for my daughter not me she knew we were together.(I haven't acknowledged her text or calls in weeks)
I've tried several times to return her stuff but she always has an excuse and says she don't want it but don't through it away.
I know she's going to crash and I right now I don't want any part of her, she has changed so much since I first met her. She has this who cares attitude, she has become very irresponsible, not paying bills, going out and hangs with crack heads, she just cares about nothing.
I love her to death but can't deal with her games. I've tried to date but can't get her out of my mind when I'm with someone else.

[Moe]

Well got a text from the Ex and been ignoring her. Now a call been ignoring her. Well in the middle of the night a text that I was going to read in the morning but knowing the kids are with her and she's hanging with low life's I read it. She wants to meet and talk, I ignored it.
So she calls I was hoping nothing to do with the kids so I answer. She starts work a six or so and wants to meet in her place of work. Wouldn't say why so I feared for her kids since she sounded upset and so I went.

I get there she is in pieces crying shaking and starts telling me her life sucks, she's not happy since we broke up, she never said since I dumped you like a jack ass LOL and she misses me so bad it hurts, I listened. She misses the closeness the wonderful fulfilling of our sex.

I said well how about your new B/F she says he won't leave and she will get rid of him, I listen, how about all the stories you told about me she said it was him and she didn't believe me until recently(I never lied to her once in my entire life) she said he's no good. I said well you really messed up me and my kids by being rude and disrespectful, she says I 'l make it up to you and them. She wants right then to start over as if we just met knowing our love is true. With her B/F still sleeping at home in her bed, right.

She then all but jumps me kissing groping rubbing and so on. Well I am a man I get all aroused get her top off she drops her drawers and starts undoing my pants.(now the temp. here today with the wind chill is 5-10 below zero and only about 30 in the area we're in) I say wait you know I don't know who you've been with let me go get protection from the truck she says OK, I mean she's ready.

WELL ON THE WAY OUT I TAKE HER CLOTHS AND GET IN MY TRUCK AND DRIVE LIKE HELL, LAUGHING SO HARD I THINK I HURT MY PECKER.

I know there's camera there so I think I'm safe. I never felt better and know I will move on to another women soon, I hope. I will be after today even taking a rest from these forms for a week or maybe longer.
But if something out of the ordinary happens I will keep you updated.

Thanks all for the help, and kind words.

[shheadz]

WELL ON THE WAY OUT I TAKE HER CLOTHS AND GET IN MY TRUCK AND DRIVE LIKE HELL, LAUGHING SO HARD I THINK I HURT MY PECKER.

Didn't I read a couple posts up about some kind of faith in JC?

[kai]

Lol someone got revenge.. but I dont think ur kids will like it