+ Follow This Topic
Results 1 to 12 of 12

Thread: Girlfriend testing our relationship...help!!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Posts
    80

    Girlfriend testing our relationship...help!!

    I'm basically going to try to sum this up to my best ability without getting too much of track...

    Our relationship has been going great other then one big mile stone...she is orthadox greek christian and i am jewish...this has bothered her because she doesn't know if we can have a future together...i am not very religious and said if i felt the same way about her 4-5 years from now(im only 18) my love and what we have with each other would be something i would be willing to sacrifice my religion to(im am not religious and i have thought about the bigger picture as well and have talked to my parents)

    recently she stopped talking to me and accted very different...she later eneded up telling me that she found another guy attractive(he is greek and se has known him for a while...he works for a shoe store and she said he was going to help her with her shoes and he was with someone else so he said...let me finish with other my other customer and i ll get right back to you...she said she hadn't been spoken to, like that in a while(she hadn't had been given that kind of direct attention in a while she said)... and she says she does not know why and doesnt feel right coming back to me yet... she said she will go on at least one or maybe more dates with him and see how she feels. Im not at a point where i dont have a feel or need to test our relationship, i guess she is...but leading back to what i had mentoned earilier i thought it was because of our differences that she has these feelings and is looking for , basically a reason to end our relationship...she said no, she has asked her mom if she would accept me and she said there is a chance...she had never asked her dad in fear of him getting mad...today she did and told him everything i said and felt...he said you guys are getting to serious and need your space(as far as accepting me he did not say no, nor did he say yes)... and btw, today is also when she is going out on the date.

    My questions are...why is she really doing this, have other people tested their relationships like this, and if so what happened, can somebody please put things in perspective, please!!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    BC, Canada
    Posts
    94
    Testing a relationship by cheating with another man (dating counts) isn't something to be taken lightly. Personally, I believe that you deserve better than someone who is obviously not commited or serious about continuing the relationship.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Posts
    84
    The signs are there that she feels too young? Also do you really want to be with someone who test the water with other people to see if she can get something better. The whole religion side of things adds more confusion to things but it seems that she hasn't made her mind up one way or the other, again perhaps down to her age?

  4. #4
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Posts
    80
    To update...
    I talked to her today and asked, "Is it that you aren't sure if you are in love with me or is it because of the bigger picture(our differences, as listed above) she said hat has nothing to do with it, i said this to her, I wish i could wait around and date other people and see what i feel and you feel but i cant do that, i still have strong feelings for her and am not or may never be at the point where i have need to date someone else to see how i feel, I said i can give a week from today(so by next monday) this includes no contact call or anything, i told her to think about everything and access it for yourself, and call me next monday to let me know

    Am i doing the right thing, can seven days possibly be enough, is it possible that someone needs to do this, please help...

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Posts
    80
    Anyone...some am i doing the right thing, is there anychance....?

  6. #6
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Posts
    80
    Hey if anyone is interested or cares that i would just post...
    I talked to her today, and she said she had really alot of fun with the other guy she went out with and didn't really even feel sad or think about me and she came to the realization that what she had for me was lust not real love, she said she loves me as a person but not as a boyfriend, so I will move on with my life and try to never turn back and try to realize that this was for the best

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    Lawrencevill, NJ USA
    Posts
    56
    That's hard man, hurts a lot. wish there was somethin to make it go away, like a way to turn off that certain part of the brain, lmao.
    Here I stand
    Head bowed for thee
    My empty heart begs you
    Leave me be

  8. #8
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Posts
    80
    should i try being friends or does that usually trun out bad and not a good idea?

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    Lawrencevill, NJ USA
    Posts
    56
    Quote Originally Posted by nfgfan
    should i try being friends or does that usually trun out bad and not a good idea?
    first of all, how long have you guy been together? was it a long term relationship? it depends how strongly you feel towards her and how long you guys were together.

    For example, i was with my ex gf for 6 years. she broke up with me and started dating someone else almost immediately. for the first 2 months i was angry and hurt - i was furious that she did that after 6 years!! she said she didnt really want to be with this other guy seriously, yet i swore i would never take her back anyway. well as time went on my anger started to subside and i started to miss her terribly. but at that point she had become more serious with the other guy. and even though she didnt think she wanted a relationship with him, she eventually fell in love with him.

    So in a way i pushed her away towards this other guy because of how horrible i acted towards her from my anger. although it would have been hard, if i would have stayed her friend, she may still have fallen out of love with me and in love with the other guy, but i wouldnt have turned her off like i did.,..

    the point is, if you want her in your life and a chance for a "possible" future, stay friends with her...thats my .02 yen
    Here I stand
    Head bowed for thee
    My empty heart begs you
    Leave me be

  10. #10
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Posts
    80
    We have been together for 8 months and she is my first love and real girlfriend(been with other girls but just flings), I think about some of the things we did together and some things about her that i really liked, but i dont know if my feelings for her will come back if we stay friends, right now i am just trying to forget about her in general

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Posts
    49
    We're in the same boat mate. Its easier to give advice than to take it, thats for sure. Try to move on, but dont make any rash decisions. Go out with friends, keep busy, dont listen to depressing music (im bad for this- as im doing it as im typing to you).

    My break up is about an hour old, hasnt sunk in yet.

  12. #12
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Posts
    80
    Yeah your right about giving advice, but thats what i plan to do, try to stay busy and go out with friends!!

Similar Threads

  1. Ugh... Shot down or testing me?
    By Graham Berkeley in forum Ask a Female Forum
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 05-02-10, 02:07 AM
  2. Testing from this kind of girl?
    By dragondragon in forum Ask a Female Forum
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 02-04-08, 07:43 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •