aftermath....

[mrquestion]

ok everyone, so i had sex for the first time... now heres the question. everything went fine and worked out, it was perfect.. we cuddled after and ended up falling asleep. the next morning we woke up and i had a morning class and she was going to fresno for 4 days... we talked a little bit, kissed her goodbye and she left. now when she got back, we havent really talked...at all. i talked to her yesterday a little bit. she seems almost kind of shy and i dont know if it was something i did or what. so if someone could give me advice on what to do? or tell me what could be going on i would appreciate it... or even if i should just flat out ask her if she is ok...

[Steve2004]

well..eh..i dont know what type of person she is so i can't really...say this and fully know what i'm talking about..but she might regret y'all having sex..not because you were bad or anything, mind you <_< but she might not have been ready for it?

s'only thing i can think of...

[BeLoved0429]

You'll have to go more in depth of this situation b/c its hard to give advice on when we dont know much details. How long have you been dating/or are you two?
Maybe she is just shy, like you assume. When it comes to sex with girls- sometimes they do get shy and dont really know how to act or what to say, i know i have before. If you guys arnt dating, shes probably unsure of how to act towards you. Have you tried telling her how you feel??? Tell her what it is you want (like if you want an actual relationship or not).

I sense that you havent even talked to her regarding how you feel... so try doing that, it may help you understand her better.

Hope this helps!!

[oscar60981]

This hasn't happened to me yet because I haven't had sex with my girlfriend, but I have thought about what to do in case this would happen. Instead of thinking about the problem, you need to show her that you are the only one for her by doing something really romantic, flowers, dinner, anything you want to do to show her that you care. If you surprise her it will be even better. good luck and who knows, maybe after this you'll get some again.

[Steve2004]

maybe after this you'll get some again.

how unbelievably classy of you

[malicia]

Hun, conversation is such a simple and straigth forward strategy. Asking her if she's ok sounds healthy to me, coz, yes, it could be shyness... or anything else. Just do it coll, you know? No pressure, no isecurity, no "I did something wrong". Maybe just move on from the great moment you two had, move ahead, using the intimacy you two allowed yourselves to have... just a suggestion.

And good luck.

[oscar60981]

how unbelievably classy of you

Hey it could happen! girls love surprises, well at least my girlfriend does.

[Steve2004]

didn't say it wasn't possible.

[mrquestion]

ok i didnt go in depth before because it would have been long as hell, but seeing as how you guys are actually willing to give advice lol here goes.... we have known each other for 3 years and have dated before but stopped, because she went away for 3 months, she came back and we started hanging out again as friends, and then you know one thing leads to another and then she asked me if i wanted to have sex, i told her i didnt want her to feel like she had to do anything she was uncomfortable with, she actually was the one who initiated the hwole thing lol.i asked her what had made her decide she wanted to do it, and she told me that we had known each other soo long and that she was 100% comfortable with me physically and emotionally so she wanted to share he first time with me...i feel the same way as she has been about 90% of everything i have done lol, and i am 19 years old. so thats the history of it....i hope it helps, please feel free to ask questions and i am willing to talk about it... thanks again

[PickupMan]

it was her first too? That explains alot right there. She just does not know how to act around u? Its that whole if we do this it might be wierd thing. Go talk to her, tell her you had a great time, and reassure her you have no regrets. Dont say anything about hooking up again, right now she may be having doubts about if she did the right thing. Dont push her. Be her friend first and her lover second. Tell her you want to spend some time with her, and talk about the situation. She is just unsure about where you are right now. Hope that helps. Good luck