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Thread: What do you think? I'm Clueless..

  1. #1
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    What do you think? I'm Clueless..

    So, i've known this guy for 3 years now and since last summer i really have begun to like him. We have a fairly close friendship to the point he is comfortable telling me how self-concious he is. But ever since my last relationship (which ended terribly) I have basically given up on finding 'Mr. right' . Since about last Christmas he has been making little comments like 'how pretty i am' and 'how i shouldn't give up on love because love could be right under my nose' which made me feel like he liked me a little. Another problem: it's like one day he's like the sweet perfect guy and the next he's uncaring and a bit mean. That confuses me so much. On the other hand I am pretty shy and It hurts to hear about him and his relationships with other women. So being the 'scardy cat' that i am i began to back away, you know like close up. I'm scared to go through another heartbreak.

    Now it has gotten to the point where we dont even talk anymore. Did I mention this is all online(MSN messenger)? Though i met him in real life he moved to NY for school, so we dont even see each other anymore unless it's over webcam. Anyhow, I recently overheard him and my cousin talking, and their topic was me.(she had him on speaker phone while doing her hair) He kept asking her how I was feeling and if I was mad at him, what he did wrong..and some other.. stange things. My cousin told him i was fine and i just need..well in her words -a man- . He said I had one but he 'evidently wasnt good enough' What's that supposed to mean?

    But, now im on my way to writing a novel so I'll stop here. Im so confused and I have so many questions..Any Advice? I'd appreciate it tons.

    Thanks :]

  2. #2
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    Quote Originally Posted by LovexShy View Post
    So, i've known this guy for 3 years now and since last summer i really have begun to like him. We have a fairly close friendship to the point he is comfortable telling me how self-concious he is. But ever since my last relationship (which ended terribly) I have basically given up on finding 'Mr. right' . Since about last Christmas he has been making little comments like 'how pretty i am' and 'how i shouldn't give up on love because love could be right under my nose' which made me feel like he liked me a little. Another problem: it's like one day he's like the sweet perfect guy and the next he's uncaring and a bit mean. That confuses me so much. On the other hand I am pretty shy and It hurts to hear about him and his relationships with other women. So being the 'scardy cat' that i am i began to back away, you know like close up. I'm scared to go through another heartbreak.

    Now it has gotten to the point where we dont even talk anymore. Did I mention this is all online(MSN messenger)? Though i met him in real life he moved to NY for school, so we dont even see each other anymore unless it's over webcam. Anyhow, I recently overheard him and my cousin talking, and their topic was me.(she had him on speaker phone while doing her hair) He kept asking her how I was feeling and if I was mad at him, what he did wrong..and some other.. stange things. My cousin told him i was fine and i just need..well in her words -a man- . He said I had one but he 'evidently wasnt good enough' What's that supposed to mean?

    But, now im on my way to writing a novel so I'll stop here. Im so confused and I have so many questions..Any Advice? I'd appreciate it tons.

    Thanks :]
    Don't give up on finding Mr. Right, just wait for him to come to you! Even though your last relationship has stopped you creating a new one, it's in the past and thats where it should stay, move on with the future. My cousin told him i was fine and i just need..well in her words -a man- . He said I had one but he 'evidently wasnt good enough' What's that supposed to mean? That means he likes you, and that you had a chance to have a relationship with him, but he thinks that you think he's not good enough for you. It could end badly but isn't it worth risking sadness, to give yourself some happiness? Life is about taking chances and risks, and if you don't you'll regret not doing anything when you had the chance to.
    Never regret something that once made you smile.

  3. #3
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    Ok, but if i do give it a try, how could i tell him my feelings..we dont talk to eachother anymore.

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by LovexShy View Post
    Ok, but if i do give it a try, how could i tell him my feelings..we dont talk to eachother anymore.
    So start talking?

    It's not difficult to send an IM.

  5. #5
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    He thinks you weren't into him at some point in time. Subtley isn't natural for guys. If you like him, flirt A LOT. and then see what he does. But try to show that it's not just play-flirting, but also don't throw yourself at him. Just make him aware that you are interested.
    Sometimes I worry about being a success in a mediocre world

    -Lily Tomlin

  6. #6
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    you say he can be "uncaring and a bit mean". Why is that? with you or with others? Isn't that a red flag? Sometimes it is OK to be scared, if that means avoiding people with a lot of damage potential. What do your guts say?
    Last edited by BillyJean; 09-05-09 at 06:08 AM.

  7. #7
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    Everyone thanks for the tips and your concern but well, I tried to talk to him yesterday and he made it very clear that he didnt like me. So I guess I'll have to move on. Thanks again though.

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