agree and move on?

[annoyed23]

my man and I had an argument yesterday about a $10 charge I made like 3 months ago for Chinese. He was upset that i didnt tell him I had chinese. we NEVER discussed calling each other to "ok" spending money...as long as we had money for the bills, whatever. especially since I was the only one working. anyhow...so he got angry at me about that last night, and then this morning accused me of not waking him up. I asked him why he was being a dick and his response was "cuz ur a bitch". GREAT!!! So why cant he just say "can we please approve spending with each other first?" and MOVE THE **** ON?? why is he doing this bullshit of ignoring me and treating me like shit for 3 days? Every little thing I do seems to irritate him...but he wont tell me. He waits till he gets sooooo irritated, and then blows up. It isnt right for him to say shit like that to me in front of our daughter first of all...and secondly...whats with the silent treatment?

[Junket]

You used his credit card?

[annoyed23]

no!!! its MINE!!

[Junket]

Then tell him to go get a job or f*ck himself.

[annoyed23]

he is working now, and his money is being split between bills and spending money...but I am afraid now that as "payback" hes going to do some grimy shit, and then let me find out. now, his grimy shit would include signing up for a dating website or something to that effect...to hit me where it really hurts (my insecurities). which isnt right...why cant he be a grown up and not make everything as revenge?

[Junket]

How old are you two?

Does he have outside friends (ones that you don't share?).

When was the last time you had good sex?

How long has this been going on?

[annoyed23]

we are 23, I know who all his friends are, and spend some time with them, we had really good sex the night before last night, and its been about a month.

[Junket]

Is there anything else going on in his life that you think may be causing him stress?

Does he have a history of looking up other women on the internet?

Do you know whether or not if he feels trapped by being married with a child?

[annoyed23]

we arent married...he says he isnt ready. he is insecure about me leaving him (which i will not do...) and hes also afraid of me cheating on him to get him back for his past (which, again, i will not do). He does have another child, and he isnt in full agreement of how the mother is raising her, but i doubt thats it...and yes, he does have a history of looking up other women. thats why we dont have internet now. he also asked me for the phone this morning (he NEVER asks me for the phone if hes at his dads) so im wondering if its to call/text someone. (aka his baby mama) which would piss me off even more...

[Junket]

It sounds to me like he's not the monogamous type.

I would guess, with what I'm looking at here, that he may be feeling resentful of being tethered to you. Granted he should have thought of that before he plugged you with his man juice, men especially as young as him are pretty ravenous for other women.

He's not ready to marry because he already has one foot out the door, and would like to keep it that way. He may insinuate that he wants to stay faithful, because that's the right thing to do, but he's letting your relationship rot because he's honestly not committed to you. It's kind of a way to sabotage the relationship, because he would prefer you break up with him so he doesn't look like so much of an asshole. Plus, you may also be providing some financial security in your shared expenses, so it's a win-win if he's getting some ass on the side, too.

But that's just a whim off the top of my head.

[annoyed23]

He keeps reiterating the fact that he doesnt want me to leave him, and hes afraid im going to...so if thats the case, why doesnt he just leave? he knows I will allow him to have time with his daughter, because thats his right. Ive told him that if he wants to leave then he can...but he's had 4 years to figure out if he wants to be with me or not. It isnt fair to me to make me miserable...but if I leave, I prove him right. I think hes trying to test my patience and see how much I will put up with. It really hurts me that as the mother of his child, he has such little regard for how I feel.

[alovehangoverr]

He keeps reiterating the fact that he doesnt want me to leave him, and hes afraid im going to...so if thats the case, why doesnt he just leave? he knows I will allow him to have time with his daughter, because thats his right. Ive told him that if he wants to leave then he can...but he's had 4 years to figure out if he wants to be with me or not. It isnt fair to me to make me miserable...but if I leave, I prove him right. I think hes trying to test my patience and see how much I will put up with. It really hurts me that as the mother of his child, he has such little regard for how I feel.

Some people don't want to be the one to end things.. it sounds like he may be at that point if he's blowing up over dumb things/trying to hurt your feelings.

Sounds like he's the type of person who would want to force you into ending it so he can play the victim.

[Tug]

Then tell him to go get a job or f*ck himself.

X2!!


You hooked up with a controlling azz who has no right to say how and where you spend YOUR money.

If he's insecure about you leaving than whys he kicking you to the curb? I used to break up with my GF all the time because I KNEW she'd come crawling back begging me not to end it. Than one day she didn't came back. No text messages, no phone calls. nothing. I knew right than and there if I didnt stop breaking up with her I was the one that was going to be hurt.

If I were you and he's adamant about ending the relationship than let it go. Chances are he'll make an excuse to contact you and start some sort of communication.

[IndiReloaded]

You should have separate accounts, and pay your bills into a common account for household expenses. Then, what you do with the rest of your money is your own business.

Oh, and when someone argues about such a small thing, out of nowhere, it means there is something else going on. Its not about $10 on Chinese, go investigate.

[lesa]

It sounds like a messed up relationship full of drama potential. And you're 23 and hoping for it to last a lifetime?