Hello i need some help with an issue.
About 8 months ago my GF and i were talking about how to handle arguments. She asked me "can you promise me not to walk out on me without resolving the arguement?" to which i replied "Yes i promise, i want to talk things out."
For my GF, promises are sacred, break a promise and you are dumped. Every BF she had was dumped after breaking a promise. I also consider promises to be something you just dont break, although if its an accident i can understand and accept that perfectly.
So the other day she was giving a male friend of hers alot of attention, like she had been doing for several days, leaving me feeling jealous (its an issue im working on) and neglected. I got upset when she went to do something with this male friend i thought she wanted to do with me. And i went for a walk without telling her, i wanted to calm down and inform her afterwards that i was feeling upset with her.
When i came back and started talking to her however she was upset with me for ignoring her, walking out and breaking the promise i made.
I apoligised and she eventually forgave me but said it would take time before she could believe any promises i would make. The following day we also talked about it and i was guilt ridden with the thought of hurting her.
The ironic part is that i wanted to prevent her getting upset by getting away and letting the jealousy fade so i would not act like a jackass. I should have informed her i was going to take a walk, but i was grumpy and my jealousy made me think "ah she's too busy talking to the other guy anyway."
Now its two days after the 'incident' and i realised the reason why i walked out without thinking about the promise i made. The promise was about not storming out during an arguement, i was trying to prevent my jealousy causing an argument, i didnt want to upset her. And so i wasnt in an arguement at the time.
I talked to her about why i did what i did. But she doesnt seem to want to hear any more of it. For her its simple, i broke a promise. Only now, two days later, do i recall the actual promise i made and realize what caused me to walk out. I feel now that i did not break any promise and should be cleared of blame. But coming up with this so late, after we had decided we were "done with the subject" is probably too late. She doesnt like it when i keep trying to 'explain myself' or 'come up with excuses'.
So in short: do i bring up the issue again and risk causing a major relationship problem while trying to clear my name, or just accept the damage done, swallow my pride and move on like she said she wants to?