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Thread: Needed words from the wise...

  1. #1
    Join Date
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    Needed words from the wise...

    I am a 19 year old male. I am currently in my first year of university. During my last year of high school, I fell in love with Vanessa, a girl, but a woman in my eyes... forever. I remember the day I first set my eyes on her. She was in the band, and she got up on stage and played the Last Post for Remembrance Day. I remember now how her spirit, her soul captued me like no other. I knew from that moment on that I loved her. It was truly love at first sight. She has been my girl from then on. Things went slowly, but surely. We've had our hard ships, we've had our suffering, we jumped our hurdles, however, it seems like we've come to a brick wall this time. Her parents have said that we are not allowed to be alone in her house any more. It would not be so detrimental to our relationship, however, my parents are INCREDIBLY OLD FASHION (more or less anti-social). I am not ALLOWED to have girls in the house. Therefore, we have no place to go. Without our moments of privacy we have NOTHING. It is those moments that form the basis of any relationship. It is during this time that two people truly bond... when the love grows and SURVIVES. The endless stare into each other's eyes, the touch of the skin. The simple, but PRIVATE things. I do not want to live our relationship in a car, I don't want to degrade it to such low-class standards. I love this girl, and only want to be with her. She deserves the best. We cried on the phone last night. "What do de do?", "What CAN we do?". Even as the tears stream from my heart, my love still rages for this girl. I am lost in a sea of emotion, and I see no port. I feel as though this is the end, even though I know it is not. I know this sounds like such a small obstacle, but it is a huge obstacle. Unpenetrable I feel. She doesn't leave her house for another year and half for university (when we could truly be together). I told her, I don't want to bank on Time, because Time, has a mind of its own. Time plays tricks on the heart, it makes people fall in, and out of love. I have loved this girl for a year. We have been going out for four months, but we have loved each other for eight. This is my girl and I need to take care of her. I am in a drunken stupor right now, and I apologize. My depression got the best of me, and I apologize once again. It feels like it is the only subsitute for her warm touch, her words of love and her hand going through my hair. I am lonely. I have no friends any more (my male, best friend has gone to China). I am truly alone now, and to top it off, I have lost my TRUE love. I am doomed.

    She has become a PART of my life. Sometimes, I wonder whether or not I made her my life. I love her with more passion and emotion than I have ever felt with anyone before. I LOVE this girl. I LOVE her. I LOVE her.

    She is so shy, she is my girl. I take care of her, I give her strength to fight the asshole's of the world. She is my 16 year old lover, however, in my eyes, she has always been a peer, and a companion. I love her and she loves me. Yet, now our love is being torn apart by superficial rules that we must somehow abide to. "People have tumbled worlds for love." I know they have. However, it seems as though things CANNOT grow or survive any more. My heart cries, my soul cries. She gives me strength, she gives me reason.

    Once again I apologize for my rambling and unclear thoughts. I blame it on the alcohol which blames it on my undying love for this girl. I welcome any wise suggestions. To be truthful, I BEG for your suggestions, your praises, your flames, your words.....


    And I thought love reigned,

    shafkore
    "I still find each day too short for all the thoughts I want to think, all the walks I want to take, all the books I want to read, and all the friends I want to see."
    - John Burroughs

  2. #2
    Join Date
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    Wow :?
    Well its going to be tough, but I have to say if you feel so strongly for this girl, and her for you, that you will make it through, even if it has to take another year and a half. Right now I'd say enjoy and use what you have and are able to have together, phone calls, letters, and even times when you are with her but you aren't alone. This could be the ultimate test of your relationship, but remember that there is a lot of time in life, and if its meant to be I believe it will happen.

    As for her parents, you'll have to gain their trust. I have a feeling something had to happen for them to suddenly put this restriction on, but any sort of animosity shown towards them will not help. I think you'll both have to act like adults, show her parents that you are adults, and both of you are responsible and good for eachother. If they are old fashioned, they probably grew up faster and had more responsibilites than our current generation, and there's nothing like a polite hard working kid that will impress them. If they really start to like you, I bet they'll think you are good for her and will start to trust you when she's in your hands. Their daughter is 16, and her parents probably still view her as a baby, you have to prove them wrong. I've always made it a priority to be in the right light with my girlfriend's parents and family, and it really helps in leeway they give you. My ex had a twin sister, her parents liked me and we could stay out till 2:00 or even sleep over at my house, they didn't like her twin sister's boyfriend and she had to be in by midnight. Goodluck and put faith in your love and relationship. If you both work at it, you'll make it.

  3. #3
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    hrmm... dilemas with the parents. as rew said, you're going to have to win the trust with the parents. by respecting their perspectives, you just show that you understand how they feel and you will abide by their rules. parents usually can be strict when it comes to dating their daughters, and they are sometimes overly protective. it will take time for them to gain their trust, but if they feel that their daughter is still their little girl, always resepct that. be happy with what you have and things will turn out for the better. when they reailze that you will not break their little girls heart, things will change. raverboy
    ...this is just my perspective on the situation...

  4. #4
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    If you do truly love her hold on to her don't give up there is always A New Hope.

  5. #5
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    I understand the depth of emotion of which you speak and it knows no age...

    There are different kinds of love - passionate love is one of them... it is the kind of love that is characterized by dramatic, agonizing, torturous and sometimes even obsessive feelings.

    I read those feelings in your posting. If those kinds of feelings translate for you into something that is good, something that you want in your life, and she feels the same way, then the two of you will find your way...

    You're young... you should enjoy those moments in the car, at the beach, beneath the stars in the park on a dark moonlit night... isn't that what being young is supposed to be about?

    How about turning your misfortune into a series of romantic adventures - two lovers, trapped in seperate worlds, destined to unite against all favour... arrange special romantic rendevous and illicit evening romps...

    That's not a reduction of the beauty of the relationship, it's taking what you have and milking it for all it's worth!

    Harlequin makes a mint selling stories about this kind of stuff... you're living it - - - go nuts!

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