Feeling abit depressed about being alone

[josha]

Hello guys - Im sorry if this is in the wrong forum.

I am 20 (soon to be 21) and havent had a girlfriend before or even kissed one (to be honest, even touched one!) With my large weight i cant see anyone being attracted to me anytime soon. I also think that my shyness puts alot of people off too, it takes alot of time for me to trust people and before that happens i am very quite to them.

And because of this shyness i seem to be going out alot to get drunk to bring out the real me? which i know im sure i should not be doing as im sure its one of the signs of being a alcholic.

I was out clubbing the other day in which my 3 friends around me managed to get girls to come up to them and started to make out with me their dancing alone sticking out like a sore thumb.

As some of you are aware, i did manage to pluck up asking someone out (after 3 weeks) and was rejected. I know what and why she did so,

Why do women allways not go with what i am - kind, caring, funny and will treat them with respect. Ive seen so many girls dump guys like myself.

Basically, i just want to know is anyone out there not thinking they would find someone and have? because at this moment in time im very depressed about being alone.

[lastwish]

Try not to focus to much about getting a lover. Get to know more girls and befriend them first. After all, the best lovers are the ones who can also be your friend.

[Lite]

It's because you're most likely pathetic, needy, whiny, and spineless.

I'm not going to apologize for being harsh, but either you know what you're worth, truly believe it, and are willing to stand up for yourself, enforce your boundaries, and not be a pussy about it or you can continue to whine and then finally develop a co-dependent relationship with someone that will end in a spectacular trainwreck.

If you're having problems finding someone to date, the problem is with you, not them. It's in how you carry yourself, how little faith you have in yourself, and your attitude.

[Rollerderby]

Confidence is really really sexy.

Neediness and insecurity is a huge turn off.

It's not about what you look like, it's the aura you project. I've dated "hot guys" and "ugly guys" and you know what? a real connection has nothing to do with the image, but with how someone carries themselves. You sound like you have metaphorical sciatica.

[joemar]

Sorry to hear that josha you have been through this. The reason behind your problem is that you are feeling lonely and don't have a way to get over it. Just try and keep yourself busy with things you like doing. Join some club or something so that when you feel lonely you can spend your time there and you can even make some new friends there. This will surely help you in getting over your loneliness. Best luck.

[kenzo07]

try to love yourself first and admire yourself first before looking for a relationship...who would ever want to have someone who cant even take care of himself..clubbing is not the answer,drinking is a no!no! try to hit the gym first!fix yourself then go out and chill you see the differnce,even without those positive traits you said,surelly they'll keep on coming to you then its all of to you..its just about winning the battle and win the war at the end..once you have them its for you how are you going to carry a relationship...