It's hard...

[A--Davies]

Never done someting like this, seems quite odd...

Just looking for some advice on what to do in my situation.

I've been seeing a girl, but not dating for about 6 months now, at first she still had a bf, but slowly has been getting rid of him. She previously dated the guy for 3 years so still has strong feelings for him, but knows he's not right (or so she says)

Anyway I have never felt this way for a girl before, i never want to leave her, always want to talk, i feel comfortable around her, trust her... but i'm getting quite frustrated that its been about 6 months and we still aren't dating. It's sorta like we are dating when we are alone, but nobody else can see how happy we are together, when we're in each others company.

Her reason for not dating is that she has stuff to figure out, granted she has had a lot of drama all her life.

Advice?

P.S. not too sure what i'm asking

[alovehangoverr]

Stop seeing her until she's single.

Seriously, 6 months is a ridiculously long time for her to lead you on and tell you she's going to leave her boyfriend.

Are you being physical with her?

Honestly, it sounds like this girl likes the attention you give her, knows she can get it in private from you, and can continue her relationship with her boyfriend instead of dealing with it.

Even if she does officially leave her boyfriend she's going to need time to get over it. Sounds to me like you'll be doing a lot of waiting for this girl.

[A--Davies]

Yes physical,

I forgot to say she has been single for a 3/4 months, but she is too nice to just get rid of the ex completely, like she still talks to him a bit...

[alovehangoverr]

Yes physical,

I forgot to say she has been single for a 3/4 months, but she is too nice to just get rid of the ex completely, like she still talks to him a bit...

How much is "a bit?"

[A--Davies]

I not 100 percent sure but maybe 1/2 times a week see each other... again not sure...

[alovehangoverr]

I not 100 percent sure but maybe 1/2 times a week see each other... again not sure...

If you're serious about pursuing this girl, you might want to GET SURE about how much they're seeing each other/talking/what they're doing.

Seriously, it's never really a great idea to spend time with an ex soon after the break up. Chances of getting back together are fairly high-- falling into old patterns is easy.

[A--Davies]

Would be nice to Be 100 percent sure, but i'm not a person who wants to noes around other people, as much as i'd like to know everything they do, i'm not one to ask because it is sorta rude :p

Also, right now she is finalizing that hes gone completely... so i'm pretty sure chances are low now...

[jumbalaya]

i was in a very similar situation...worked with a girl and we got close...she was just getting out of a long relationship with a guy her fam loved...bout 3-4 yr rel. she seemed pretty sick of him. i gave her a lot of attention, and i guess that was magnified by her frustration with him. we messed around for maybe 5 months...then i asked to make it official. she reluctantly did, but still it was strange. we were cool with my fam or when were around my friends. but i was never brought around her fam or her friends. i ended up getting frustrated bc i had my doubts and its a catch-22 bc trust is important but i was getting conflicting stories. at the job ppl knew we were close, i never would deny we were dating, but i didnt run around screaming it...but i found out that she flat out denied anything between us.

long story short, the constant thought that something might be going on behind the scenes made little issues become much larger. we became frustrated. after lng rel. ppl need time to grieve. i was there as part of the grieving process so it was bad timing on my behalf. mayb if i ddnt mess with her and waited the 5 months, it would have worked, but it didnt.

i know she has since gotten back with him and they have a kid together. it doesnt bother me bc it wasnt like i was in madly in love, it was still a blossoming thing with us. i do hear that she is very unhappy with the rel...not her child.

[alovehangoverr]

Would be nice to Be 100 percent sure, but i'm not a person who wants to noes around other people, as much as i'd like to know everything they do, i'm not one to ask because it is sorta rude :p

Also, right now she is finalizing that hes gone completely... so i'm pretty sure chances are low now...

I'm not sure how it's rude to ask the girl you're seeing and could potentially end up dating how things are going with her ex hah. I'm just trying to give you a bit of warning of how things can change.