It's hard to live sometimes. I'll make my story super-short:
I came from a hard place with a lot of violence and stuff. But I hold a lot of Christian values although I am not an official Christian. So I meet this girl in 2006 and we seem to hit off. I get attached. But we're SO different...
It's like, when I think about it now... That I met my exact opposite!! Even though I love her-- We are SO different in EVERY aspect of life. I know that my destiny is to cut it off--
But I have these feelings of guilt-- That I've done her wrong, that I messed it up... That I messed up my life...
In reality, I should blame HER. For being such a crazy, older, immoral person! I absolutely hate EVERY single thing about her. Somehow, I love her now. But this will never work.
This is one of the hardest things I will ever have to do because I really do love this person. But we are SO, *SO* wrong for each other!!! Why did God even let me meet her???!! Now I do love her..... But I think about life as in terms of thousands of years.................
I could never ever be with someone like her forever. Even though I now have love for her.
It's over now. How could God allow this? I thought the Bible said God would protect me, especially if I was a servant, which I have been!!
This is horrible!! But.... it happened. Now, I will be left with these questions... and this sadness......
I guess F it all. I know I could not be with her forever. I wish this would have never happened. I didn't learn ANYTHING. All I learned is that I actually hate her and people like her.
That's my story.
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26-03-09, 12:44 PM #1
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HURT / relationships/ PAIN / etc. MY experience
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26-03-09, 12:49 PM #2
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son dont worry. and dont hate life my G, u just gotta chill out, look for sumone tha feels u, nah mean? me, i neverr get close wit chicks, tha why i'm beast. i just bag and smash. tha wha u should try to do..... bag and smash.
bag
n
smash
not tha hard fam. go and getz it in mo.
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26-03-09, 12:56 PM #3
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Man, that's what I'm sayin' exactly!! I've never been this emotional crazy dude and shit!! I had a real bad time in 2005 and I was all crazy... I met her in 2006 after she had a real bad divorce... It's like I got hooked up with some crazy psycho bitch when I was weak!! Man, I wanted the Universe to be on MY side!! You know??
Man I totally feel you! I'm not all about the drama and crazy shit!!!!! Why did the world hook me up with this totally psycho BITCH????!!!
Well... At least, I'm STARTING to get over it... I guess the thing is... I was all depressed when I got hooked up with her so I made it all like she was more important than my own independence..... and myself
And that is NOT who i am. I don't normally give two shits about ANYONE. NO ONE. I can't believe I got sucked into one of those crazy Christian-people, guilty relationships!! I HATE PEOPLE LIKE THAT!!! DAMMIT!
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26-03-09, 01:02 PM #4
atada a mis pies.
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you're going to hell.
baby ya hustle. but me i hustle harder.
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26-03-09, 01:11 PM #5
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misombra--
Thanks but I've already been to Hell several times. I used to use drugs as hard as PCP and the like. I know what Hell is like. I've been there. By your own comments, in fact, I can tell that you are in Hell right now or are going there soon... And I feel bad for you.
Life is tough...... Which is why I've always thought that getting into a relationship of any sort is basically ALWAYS bad news.
I've never needed pathetic humans like you. I always only needed God. Maybe, I screwed myself......... But I've been dead since I was born. Unlike you. I was born into Hell... and into the Grace.
You.... You still have some time in Hell. Thanks for the words of evil, though, Have a good time dealing with that. It might take me a year or two.. but it will probably take you 10 or 20 years. LOL. Sucker.
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26-03-09, 01:13 PM #6
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P.S. Why don't you get rid of that horribly ugly and useless huge signature? Is that supposed to make you feel better about yourself? You are the true definition of a loser.
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26-03-09, 01:20 PM #7
atada a mis pies.
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Originally Posted by GemStar
you're going to burn in hell for eternity.baby ya hustle. but me i hustle harder.
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26-03-09, 01:33 PM #8
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There is no god, you control your own fate and write your own destiny, no one else.
Opposites attract.
"What you really fear is inside yourself. You fear your own power.
You fear your own anger, the drive to do great and terrible things."
The Warmonger
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26-03-09, 01:35 PM #9
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"Judge not lest ye be judged..." or something like that... sorry, my 'Christian' is a little rusty.
Anyway... the 'Christian' version of God probably wouldn't favor someone as judgmental as you.
Btw.. the universe is not against you... the vast majority of your life's circumstances are a result of the decisions you make. So instead of blaming everyone in your life for your poor choices.. it might be in your best interests to learn how you can take control of your life via the choices you make.
It's up to you... either you can succeed in life and be happy by taking responsibility for your own actions... or you can continue blaming everyone and end up very much alone and unhappy. The choice is yours... it's your life that's in your charge. Will you waste the time you have or put it to good use?"The weakest soul, knowing its own weakness, and believing this truth that strength can only be developed by effort and practice, will, thus believing, at once begin to exert itself, and, adding effort to effort, patience to patience, and strength to strength, will never cease to develop, and will at last grow divinely strong."
- James Allen
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26-03-09, 04:06 PM #10
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Ok. C'mon. God isn't to blame for your poor taste. The universe isn't to blame for you being weak and getting yourself into this situation.
It's time to be held accountable for your actions.
Seriously, it seems that some people "find religion," so that they can claim no responsibility for their wrongs. Time to grow up.
As for all of this talk about not wanting to live, being born dead, etc-- listen, if your life is so terrible, get some help. Again, it's in YOUR HANDS to do something about it.
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27-03-09, 02:38 AM #11
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Become a nihilist and all your problems will go away.
If you don't, you'll go to hell.
I'm going to hell too, I guess, so that's why I decided to become a nihilist.BACAMO
Originally Posted by Frasbee
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27-03-09, 04:05 AM #12
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God doesn't exist, thats why he allowed it to happen...lol
You been a loyal servant to God and look what happened. You still got your heart broken. God is just there to make you feel better about dieing. He isn't Dr. Phil.
You control your destiny. Its in YOUR POWER! Remember that.
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27-03-09, 06:23 AM #13
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Wait a sec... don't the Christians believe in free will? And God helps a man who helps himself?
Seems like 'God' doesn't really help at all... that you are still responsible for your own actions..."The weakest soul, knowing its own weakness, and believing this truth that strength can only be developed by effort and practice, will, thus believing, at once begin to exert itself, and, adding effort to effort, patience to patience, and strength to strength, will never cease to develop, and will at last grow divinely strong."
- James Allen
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27-03-09, 11:04 AM #14
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The answer is clear. Donate all your money to Churches. I can't believe I didn't see this before. Originally Posted by Aeradalia
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27-03-09, 11:07 AM #15
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Originally Posted by timeless86
Duh... it says so in the fine print on the pieces of paper they hand you when you join a church... it's viewable with a 20x lens at the very bottom.
"The weakest soul, knowing its own weakness, and believing this truth that strength can only be developed by effort and practice, will, thus believing, at once begin to exert itself, and, adding effort to effort, patience to patience, and strength to strength, will never cease to develop, and will at last grow divinely strong."
- James Allen
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