Money in relationship

[Mish]

no i don't think women are entitled to more but are entitled to an equal footing

but i will still pay half even if he gets paid more which is likely, coz it's the best option to protect myself

I agree with that and have no problem with it^^^

its tougher being a woman, and myself being one feels it.

I disagree with this^^^ The problems are different for every gender. If you want to go into statistics then I can come up with a list as well:

1. Statistically more women initiate divorce proceedings than men.
2. Statistically more women get full custody of children after a divorce than men.
3. More men are automatically expected to approach and initiate contact with women, then the other way around (read preparation costs and acquisition of new skills)
4. Learning how to read vague signs and tell the difference between wanted and unwanted attention (read preparation costs and acquisition of new skills)
5. Dealing with double social standards that on one hand expect men to act in a traditional role and provide all benefits that come with it and on the other hand act in a progressive role and provide all benefits that come with that.
6. Dealing with unjust and outdated social perception of men as "providers" and all the confusion that follows it.

The way I see it both genders have problems to overcome, neither one has it harder or easier. There is no need to feel as a victim by anyone based on their gender.

[bluesummer]

I have offered to split the bill one every first date..............



..........I especially INSISTED on the ones where I knew there'd be no second date, and didn't want to feel like I'd ripped him off.

[ecojeanne]

mish i have to disagree, men are financially better off and don't have to worry about being physically hurt by the opposite sex when dating.

men have more strength and money and pay less for their lives when it comes to clothes and upkeep

therefore men have more power

women are getting more power but ultimately have a harder time when it comes to dating and living. how many men walk away from children verses women walking away. it's a lot more men. yes some good men suffer at the hands of women but i still believe men can choose to have an easier life than women can. and thats just my opinion and how i feel about protecting my body and my view on working and living as a woman.

[Only-virgins]

mish i have to disagree, men are financially better off and don't have to worry about being physically hurt by the opposite sex when dating.

men have more strength and money and pay less for their lives when it comes to clothes and upkeep

This is so wrong I wont even bother. I'm just gonna smile and nod. *nods*

[Mish]

mish i have to disagree, men are financially better off and don't have to worry about being physically hurt by the opposite sex when dating.

men have more strength and money and pay less for their lives when it comes to clothes and upkeep

therefore men have more power

Eco, again it depends on how you look at it. Men (on average) may have more physical strength over women and this is why more women than men are physically abused which is unjustifiably wrong. But women (on average) have more emotional power over men which is why more men than women lose their kids in a divorce for little or no fault of their own which is also unjustifiably wrong. Which one is horrendously worse? The jury is out on that one. The answer as I see it neither gender has it better statistically or otherwise. It's just, the problems each gender faces are different.

[someguy1984]

it's tougher being a woman imo, we have to deal with unwanted leering and less pay overall, we are weaker in strength and therefore have to be on alert from unwanted attention. i think men have it a lot easier. and then they get to pay less nowadays for the date, even tho the women spent more money and effort looking good coz womens clothes of same quality are more expensive generally. men generally have better jobs and get paid more than women around the world. why should men expect anything in return for the date?

because men are thinking like this that they are owed or deserve something in return i would always pay 50/50. some men just don't appreciate how easy they have it.

Um, what? "Some men just don't appreciate how easy they have it."

If girls spend money looking good on makeup, etc, that's their "option." I know plenty of girls who do not wear makeup and are beautiful. Bring up clothess and appearance is irrelevent in this matter.

Women clothes are not more expensive, actually they are cheaper...(In my opinion) I never see sales on clothes i buy anywhere close to the sales for women clothing. You get these shirts basically made of nothing for $10 and they still look good...I'm spending a minimum of $65 a shirt...Like i said, it all depends on who buys what, or where you both shop...

Trying to categorize life being easier as a women vs a man is stupid. They both have their advantages and disadvantages, period.

Also, what is this talk about guys getting paid more? What? I'm not sure how old you are, or where you get this information...Guys DO NOT get paid more money and what does being stronger have to do with anything?

Realistically, you could make a ton of cash being a women stripper...Plenty of them are bringing in over $1000 cash a night...

Also, the way you imply: " i think men have it a lot easier. and then they get to pay less nowadays for the date."

This just sounds like a girl who doesn't appreciate the courtesy of a guy taking you out. You make it seem like it's not a big and he SHOULD be paying for you, because you look good for him? I'm not sure where your logic is going with this....

So, if you buy a new hair straightener, he should take you out to a more expensive dinner, since you look better for him? This is how your implying your post...

You should respect what the man pays for and not expect it. It should be recognized with gratitude, not expectation. This is exactly the attitude that astonishes me.

[ecojeanne]

‘Also, what is this talk about guys getting paid more? What? I'm not sure how old you are, or where you get this information...Guys DO NOT get paid more money and what does being stronger have to do with anything?’

Actually that has been discussed as to why previously due to men not getting pregnant and women being a liability in the workplace and therefore get less promotions than men therefore less pay. There have been many books written about this subject too. Even lite admitted women get something like 30% less pay than men on average

Realistically, you could make a ton of cash being a women stripper...Plenty of them are bringing in over $1000 cash a night...

Realistically most women don’t want to be strippers just to have men leering at them and cause risk to their safety…you’ll find many women saying no thanks.

This just sounds like a girl who doesn't appreciate the courtesy of a guy taking you out. You make it seem like it's not a big and he SHOULD be paying for you, because you look good for him? I'm not sure where your logic is going with this....

I don’t think he ‘should’ be paying, what I am pointed out is how one-sided the power is and tbh I wish more women were 50/50 power and paying for dates if one or other or both choose to pay for the date is up to them. After-all I already mentioned it’s down to the individuals themselves. And yes I do think women clothes do cost more on average…I might just see if I can find some evidence coz I reckon I’m right but it an assumption on my part so I’ll let that one go for the moment

You should respect what the man pays for and not expect it. It should be recognized with gratitude, not expectation. This is exactly the attitude that astonishes me.

So yes this comment I do have the main problem with, what gratitude is a man expecting? And bear in mind I’m considering the original poster getting ‘nothing’ and the reason I starting replying in the first place. And I never expect it. I would however prefer to be in the man’s position when it comes to dating and not have to worry about anything (women worry about being attacked, it’s a huge worry) but turning up and having a bit of cash and maybe if I’m (the man) lucky and pay enough I’ll get a leg over…..

can you not see where I’m coming from?

[sparkster]

mish you ignored my other points that i mentioned and why are they 'expecting' something in return for paying for the date...that is my main issue not whether they are responsible for paying (its a choice of the individual at the end of the day). if they pay then stop expecting women to put out. stop leering at women, make womens clothes cheaper or at least the same price as mens with the same quality and give them higher paying jobs then we will have an equal footing when it comes to paying for dates. i also said coz some men are such expecting assholes it's best for women to pay 50/50 and women lose out more than men financially and thats my point mish and why the hell are men complaining that they expect or deserve something. men have it much easier than women and it's irritating.

the OP gets 'nothing' in return and it seems to be a common thought amongst men. now not only do women get screwed financially but they get screwed after a date coz they should give back to the guy who could afford to pay for a frikin dinner, yeah sounds fair

Do you know that men has less lifetime than women? Employers involve of men more responsibility than women. In result of it more stress, more tiredness against women

[ecojeanne]

^^ employers won't give women responsibility because they are biased towards promoting men due to women being a liability coz they get pregnant and look after the children when they are sick.

men die younger and i reckon there are plenty of women around the globe relieved









j/k

[someguy1984]

‘Also, what is this talk about guys getting paid more? What? I'm not sure how old you are, or where you get this information...Guys DO NOT get paid more money and what does being stronger have to do with anything?’

Actually that has been discussed as to why previously due to men not getting pregnant and women being a liability in the workplace and therefore get less promotions than men therefore less pay. There have been many books written about this subject too. Even lite admitted women get something like 30% less pay than men on average

Realistically, you could make a ton of cash being a women stripper...Plenty of them are bringing in over $1000 cash a night...

Realistically most women don’t want to be strippers just to have men leering at them and cause risk to their safety…you’ll find many women saying no thanks.

This just sounds like a girl who doesn't appreciate the courtesy of a guy taking you out. You make it seem like it's not a big and he SHOULD be paying for you, because you look good for him? I'm not sure where your logic is going with this....

I don’t think he ‘should’ be paying, what I am pointed out is how one-sided the power is and tbh I wish more women were 50/50 power and paying for dates if one or other or both choose to pay for the date is up to them. After-all I already mentioned it’s down to the individuals themselves. And yes I do think women clothes do cost more on average…I might just see if I can find some evidence coz I reckon I’m right but it an assumption on my part so I’ll let that one go for the moment

You should respect what the man pays for and not expect it. It should be recognized with gratitude, not expectation. This is exactly the attitude that astonishes me.

So yes this comment I do have the main problem with, what gratitude is a man expecting? And bear in mind I’m considering the original poster getting ‘nothing’ and the reason I starting replying in the first place. And I never expect it. I would however prefer to be in the man’s position when it comes to dating and not have to worry about anything (women worry about being attacked, it’s a huge worry) but turning up and having a bit of cash and maybe if I’m (the man) lucky and pay enough I’ll get a leg over…..

can you not see where I’m coming from?

No, i don't get where you are coming from at all. Your claiming women get less promotions than men, your claiming women don't want to be strippers, and your claiming it's hard being a women for fear of attack...

First of all, none of these things are true...Plenty of women are getting promotions and make just as much as men...How about grocery stores? Look how many female managers are around...Guys are usually grocery managers and females take customer service type manager positions. If you really want to get detailed, in some cases women will have it easier in a higher position, because they are not expected to work as hard being a female. (Can't lift anything heavy, etc) So, they have males do the actual hard work for them, although they are getting the higher pay...Don't even say women get paid less, because if you really think that, you need to get your head on straight. It is an even world when it comes to rate of pay for sex, or race...

Girls don't want to be strippers huh? Well, maybe you don't...But, i know at least 3 girls that are strippers now and love it...They get payed a ton of money and don't even have to get naked! They just tease and get complimented all night long and told me they love it...They work 3 days a week and have enough for a house...Just because you don't want to do it, you can't say that these women are against it...They do it for the money and it feels good getting the compliments...

Getting attacked? Why are men any different? How can you blame fear of getting attacked and try to somehow use that against me in this conversation? How do you even think this is fair? If I'm walking down a dark road at night and someone holds me to gun point, i think i have fear of getting attacked to...The same type of person to attack a female, will surely not be afraid to do the same to a male. Plenty of stories like this...Sure, rape could be a concern, but you should never put yourself in this situation...Like i said, walking out somewhere stupid alone, putting yourself in a vulnerable situation is your own fault and shouldn't be used as pity in this discussion...

Your attitude is making men sound superior and macho, when in reality it's not true at all...Women rights are equal and so are job opportunities.

I mean come on, we almost had a women president this year...

It's stupid to imply it's easier being a man, or easier being a women...They both are equal and have advantages and disadvantages. Anything stated otherwise, is gibberish.

[ecojeanne]

Guys are usually grocery managers and females take customer service type manager positions

LMAO seriously you are agreeing with me now, the guys have a higher position according to you statement above. Which agrees with my point about men in higher positions. Thankyou.

1) They just tease and get complimented all night long and told me they love it

2) Sure, rape could be a concern, but you should never put yourself in this situation

Those 2 statements contradict each other in my book. It’s not safe for women to flaunt and tease men. Why don’t we suggest more men become strippers? How many men verses women get raped by the opposite sex do you think? Yes women do have to fear more and are encouraged to take these kinds of risky jobs to have a higher standard of living. Like I said most women would choose another option IF THEY HAVE SENSE.

It's stupid to imply it's easier being a man, or easier being a women...They both are equal and have advantages and disadvantages. Anything stated otherwise, is gibberish

It’s clever to ignore the obvious truth

[bluesummer]

No, i don't get where you are coming from at all. Your claiming women get less promotions than men, your claiming women don't want to be strippers, and your claiming it's hard being a women for fear of attack...

First of all, none of these things are true...

I'm sorry, what? All of these things are true, what fantasy world are you living in? I work for a bank, okay. There are more men in the upper ranks of the bank than women. Granted, it's increasing but it's still not 'even'. Besides, we're talking about real world promotions at real jobs and careers that require education, not ****ing grocery store managers and McDonald's managers. SECONDLY, I don't know any women who aspire to be strippers, because all my friends are educated responsible people. Women who want to be strippers tend to have little other options, except maybe a Hooters waitress. THIRD, yes women do fear getting attacked, especially in the city I live. You can't go certain places without an escort.

Don't even say women get paid less, because if you really think that, you need to get your head on straight. It is an even world when it comes to rate of pay for sex, or race......

Omfg. You have got to be kidding me. Do you know ANYTHING AT ALL about the world outside your front door, my friend? Anything at all?

Girls don't want to be strippers huh? Well, maybe you don't...But, i know at least 3 girls that are strippers now and love it...They get payed a ton of money and don't even have to get naked! They just tease and get complimented all night long and told me they love it...They work 3 days a week and have enough for a house...Just because you don't want to do it, you can't say that these women are against it...They do it for the money and it feels good getting the compliments...

Well shit, what a great argument for being a stripper. Drunk losers complimenting you? Getting paid to be brainless? Wow, sounds like a dream. Sadly, I'll probably have to stick to using my brain and slaving away at my 'shitty' bank job. You know, like most other women with self respect.

Sure, rape could be a concern, but you should never put yourself in this situation...Like i said, walking out somewhere stupid alone, putting yourself in a vulnerable situation is your own fault and shouldn't be used as pity in this discussion...

Oh, it's that adorable 'if you got raped you asked for it' argument. Women don't just get raped for getting themselves 'in a situation', god. I bet you wouldn't be singing the same tune if someone broke into your house and raped your mom.