OK Guys..who should say I love you first?

[Pink68]

In a 11 month relationship that is awesome and I trully love this man.. and get the same vibe from him..
Read my other post here to get the whole story...

I don't want to force anything..but are guys just chicken??? Should I tell him or wait for him to take the lead?

[Cain]

If you feel it and you're sure you mean it, say it.

I won't tell a girl I love her in the first six months even if I think I feel it because I want to make sure that it's not just infatuation. After that time passes, however, I'll say it if I feel it without expecting reciprocation. In fact, I'd feel more comfortable if she didn't say it back immediately because I'd feel like she wasn't saying it back out of reaction.

[Illusional]

without reading your story, either "your" bf is chicken or you're expecting way too much from him.

raverboy

[Pink68]

I was under the impression that men like to be the ones to say it first?

Or is that just a load of crap?

[Cain]

I was under the impression that men like to be the ones to say it first?

Or is that just a load of crap?

I don't think it matters who says it first. Personally, I don't care either way. I'll say it when I feel it and not in response to her.

[Illusional]

I was under the impression that men like to be the ones to say it first?

Or is that just a load of crap?

i think men in general want to be the ones to initiate things however this is also an old fashioned way of thinking.

raverboy

[Lite]

I think such rules are petty bullshit propagated by the patriarchy.

[Cbrider]

I don't understand who thinks up all these rules and time frames.

Its YOUR relationship involving YOU...be honest, tell the other person how you feel.

My life is not bound by rules and regulations, its bound by my will and thats it.

[emily]

I think you should wait for him to say.. Once you say it you wont feel special as you should be feeling being a girl.. You need to be proposed not the otherway round.. That is if you are looking for something serious and forever -as you want to feel the special moment forever..
Otherwise anyone says doesnt matter..
And do you really want to turn this into a relation? you can actually enjoy this moment for a little longer..once you become Bf and gf then you know how life becomes...If i was you i would have enjoyed the moment for some more time.

[Lite]

I think you should wait for him to say.. Once you say it you wont feel special as you should be feeling being a girl.. You need to be proposed not the otherway round.. That is if you are looking for something serious and forever -as you want to feel the special moment forever..
Otherwise anyone says doesnt matter..
And do you really want to turn this into a relation? you can actually enjoy this moment for a little longer..once you become Bf and gf then you know how life becomes...If i was you i would have enjoyed the moment for some more time.

Yes, because obviously it cheapens it if you say it first, because you're a girl and obviously us men don't have emotions at all. Do yourself a favor and stop confusing stoicism and life training to not show emotion with not actually having emotion.

[cbs]

If you wanna say it, SAY IT, how can you live thinking always in what to do or what to say....

Come on you are in a relationship is not an interview.

[carl1222]

What surprises me is that almost a year into your relationship, you are having this conversation with us instead of him.

I would think that by now, you should trust each other enough to be able to discuss something so fundamental as how you feel about each other, ya think?

Carl.

ps "I love you" is just words. And words that are used in many contexts at that. Some say "I love you" at a ridiculously early point (i.e. weeks) to mean nothing more than they are infatuated and want to commit to you. Some take it for the serious thing it is and are much more cautious and less casual about it. Some say it because it's expected at a certain point of the relationship. Others are scared to death of it. By now, you should know whether he loves you by his actions, not his words.

[Gribble]

I've never heard that rule before. Lots of young girls are quick to say it, though. I mean second date quick. That will drive off any sane guy.

But after 11 months? If you mean it, say it. What is or isn't dangling between your legs is no reason to hold back.

[Pink68]

Thanks for the input!

I just want to make sure I am not rushing ... I felt strong feelings after our first date... haven't felt like this in..well...ever... : )
He definately shows me in his actions...
I know people ask questions on this board when they seem to already know the answer...Spending some time together this weekend....

Gee Whiz!! I feel like a kid again!!!

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

When I am nervous about saying those three little words, I tell the guy I have something to tell them, but I fear they will not feel the same way. Then I hint it til it finally turns into those three words, but that's just me. I dont know if I can deal with the humiliation of blurting out I love you and they are just lost for words and turn around to tell me they dont feel the same way. I rather hint it and when they hint that the feelings are not mutual, I wont have to say it. But like I said, thats just me.

As for saying it after the second date, LMFAO! Gribble, you're messin with some crazy chicks....come let me show you a good time, no I love you's attached.