Im Useless and Talking/Flirting With Girls

[Gfunk]

Firstly im 17. had one girlfriend when i was 13 for about 1 month. (She asked me out i didnt ask her). I havent had a girlfriend after that and ive had my chance with some last year when i had a girl that liked me but being shy that i am i waited to long and she lost interest.... At work today i was 90% sure that this girl was flirting with me but i have no idea how to do it back. So being the dumbass i am i just told her what she wanted and i walked off . I know im not ugly but its just my confidence that sucks big time.


Can anyone help me/provide any tips.... i feel im like im losing out my teenage years by not chasing round girls

[vashti]

The only way to gain confidence in this area is by practicing, and really, flirting is only about being especially nice to someone, and being comfortable when you do it.

I suggest you start by flirting with girls you like, but don't really care about. For example, if you graded girls on a scale from 1-10 (which I ordinarily hate, but am using it for illustrative purposes), try flirting with the ones who you'd rank 4-6. This way, you can aquire some skill. When your confidence improves, then you can move on to girls that you are more interested in.

You won't be perfect initially - no one is - but you will get better with practice.

[jeffyrud]

you going to be fine, flirting is quite simple. Just tease her. Dont be rude or anything but have fun with it. As long as you having fun and tease her, u good as far as the convo goes

[kikibrown22]

Being playful is definitely a good idea. Show that you're interested in her what she has to say (but don't just ask a lot of questions, make sure it's a give and take type of thing). She's the one who started flirting with you, so just feed off her cues.

I have to kind of disagree with vashti's comment that you should flirt with unattractive girls. While I agree that it would be a good way to practice without being so nervous, it misleads these poor girls. You'd be better choosing perfect strangers who you're not likely to see again. Just make a few flirty comments and walk away. You'll both feel good about yourselves and if you say something stupid, you don't have to worry about seeing that person again. Just keep it brief so that there's no risk of that person asking you out (unless you're actually interested). So next time you're out shopping, just strike up a conversation with the cute cashier, etc.

[Gfunk]

Yeah thnxx but how do i actually flirt??

[jeffyrud]

you have to challenge her. It is very subtle yet very effective. Teasing her is awesome. Saying things like Are you trying to seduce me? Your too much of a nice girl for me, etc.. are types of playful attitudes. The most important thing is to remember how you actually say it. Here is an article that might help [url]http://howtogetdates.wordpress.com/2009/01/08/the-perfect-thing-to-say-to-a-woman-part-1/[/url]
Remember when you say things like I dont date your type, it has to come off playful and not serious. So put on a bit of a cocky smirk and everything should be well

[kikibrown22]

Yeah that article pretty much nails it, though I'm not sure it completely informs you on how to actually go about it. I've been racking my brain trying to think back to all the different ways I've been flirted with but it's hard to verbalize.

The only ones that really come to mind are the brutal ones. Like a guy who told me his mom thought I was cute and told him to ask me out. Another guy came up to me and asked me how I felt about my haircut, and then, after I replied, he told me that he didn't think it was a good look - yet he still spent the rest of the night trying to pick me up. That's a classic technique that guys use. They pick on something about the girl and then playfully put it down (like the shirt she's wearing, or her drink choice, etc.). In this case though, the guy failed to take the playful angle.

A good example of a flirty moment was when I was standing in line at a cash register and there was a sketchy basket of free cookies, so the guy in line behind me dared me to eat one and then offered to split one with me. I definitely didn't eat it, but it got me chatting with him.

Don't know if those examples are at all helpful!