Disease, Dental Dams & Cunnilingus

[Gribble]

I'm not one for long-term monogamous relationships. I meet a girl, we date a bit, have sex a few times, then I return to the single life for a couple of months or so. I'm very picky about the women I have sex with. Despite my serial monogamy I tend to seek women who are uniquely interesting and intelligent over women who like to show off the goods and give it up at the drop of a hat. Give me a librarian over a cheerleader any day.

Because I tend to go from one partner to the next protection is always a major concern of mine. I've never had sex without a condom. Whenever possible I like to actually get tested along with my temporary mate just to make sure all is on the up and up. In a perfect world we'd always get tested before sex. That isn't the case, though.

I absolutely love to perform oral sex. It's practically the highlight of the whole game. Lately, though, I've been thinking. When a girl goes down on me I can wear a condom and she can be fairly certain that she's safe from disease. When I go down on a girl, however, what assurances do I have? Unless we've been tested, none.

I'm curious how easily a man can contract a disease from a woman through oral sex. I'm also curious what women think of dental dams. Has a man ever used one with you? They look absurd to me and I can't imagine how the act could be enjoyable for either party with a great big square of latex covering the guy's face. For that matter, they're rather creepy. I've always consoled myself by thinking that if lesbians are the least likely group to transmit disease I must be fairly safe dining at the Y without protection. Am I being ignorant and naive?

[Hellfire]

You can certainly pick up and give diseases performing oral sex on a woman, particularly herpes. Anything that it transmissible through mixing of bodily fluids you're at risk of giving or getting. I've never had a guy use a dental dam on me, maybe it's worth a try.

[misombra]

there is no other assurance other than getting tested. even then that is not assuring that one is free of all possible infections and bugs.

you have to choose wisely. respect your penis and your tongue.

[1averagejoe]

Herpes can be given even if there is no signs or open sores.

Don't want that growing on your face do you?

Be careful.

[vashti]

You should ask what specifically the physician is testing FOR before you get all confident about how disease free you guys are. There is no standard for what is being tested for, and many physicians will only test for the most common STDs. Also, some STDs are diagnosed by visual inspection (the initial stage syphillis and HPV, for example), and without visual symptoms, there will be no further evaluation.

Gribble, as much as I hate to say it, you really shouldn't be putting your mouth on anyone's vagina that you aren't willing to take a risk for. Use a dental dam or don't do it because herpes can be passed along very easily.

[Gribble]

I'd use a dental dam, I really would. However, I think if I plaster one of those things across my face before going down under not only will she laugh at me, but she'll probably be too weirded out to enjoy it.

Anyone have experience with them? Do they feel okay? How do you keep them in place? It would kind of suck if my hands were completely occupied with holding a square of latex over her privates. I generally like to roam.

[1averagejoe]

If you're going to use a dental dam...just get tested.

I can't imagine myself ever using one, it would just take away from the enjoyment and intimacy of going down and I would look and feel retarded. If you're worried about catching something, get tested.

[ecojeanne]

hey guys heres some info from this website:

[url]http://www.brown.edu/Student_Services/Health_Services/Health_Education/sexual_health/sti/oralsex.htm[/url]

STIs can be transmitted during unprotected oral sex. Oral sex is a much lower risk activity than intercourse, but there's still a possibility for transmission. Not using a condom, dental dam, or other barrier puts both partners at risk. This means that performing and receiving oral sex puts you at risk. Some STIs are more likely to be transmitted during oral sex than others, including:


Herpes is transmitted by skin-to-skin contact with a developing or existing sore. The virus can be transmitted from genitals to mouth if the person giving oral sex has or is developing a cold sore. It can also be transmitted from mouth to genitals if the person receiving oral sex has or is developing a genital sore.


Gonorrhea is transmitted when bacteria are present in body fluids. A person giving oral sex can get a gonorrhea infection of the throat if their partner has gonorrhea.


For the person receiving oral sex, there's little chance of contracting HIV, although it's difficult to pinpoint when HIV has been transmitted because people rarely engage in only one type of sexual activity. In the case of fellatio (oral sex on a man), the HIV virus theoretically could gain entry from the mouth to the opening on the tip of the penis, or through an open cut or lesion on the penis. If you receive oral sex, however, you mainly expose yourself to saliva, which has negligible concentrations of HIV.

For the cunnilingus (oral sex on a woman) recipient, the chance of HIV transmission is also low, although the entire vagina is a mucous membrane through which, theoretically, the virus can be transmitted. A woman receiving cunnilingus is more at risk of getting herpes or gonorrhea from her partner than HIV.

The risk of HIV infection is greater for the partner who performs oral sex. A person performing oral sex on a woman should avoid it during her period, for menstrual blood can carry the HIV virus. Research presented at the 7th Conference on Retroviruses and Opportunistic Infections in February of 2000 concluded that 8 of 122 cases in an HIV-transmission study were possibly attributable to performing oral sex on a man. Of these 8 infected people, some reported having had recent dental work or having cuts in their mouths, suggesting that HIV transmission by oral sex is associated with cuts, lesions, or irritation of the tissues in the mouth.

Other STIs that can be transmitted through oral sex, although less commonly, include:

HPV (genital warts)
Hepatitis B
Syphilis
Chlamydia
Chancroid





What are the symptoms of an oral STI?
If you have an oral STI infection, you might experience a sore throat, tonsillitis, oral lesions, or cold sores. However, many oral STI cases are asymptomatic. If your partner(s) is diagnosed with an STI, you should see a medical provider to be tested and possibly treated.

How are they treated?
Treatments vary based on the STI diagnosed and the severity of the case. For example, gonorrhea can be treated with antibiotics but HIV cannot. Refer to the specific infection in the STI section to learn more about particular treatments.

How can I protect myself?
You and your partner need to make decisions based on an understanding of the risks involved and respect for each other's comfort level. Click here to read more about sexual decision-making. The safest choice is to use a latex barrier during every act of oral sex. Using a condom or a dental dam during oral sex will prevent STIs transmitted by skin-to-skin contact or by fluid transmission. Here are some suggestions to incorporate into your sexual activities:

Use the latex barrier from start to finish of oral sex.
Use a non-lubricated or a flavored condom on a penis or sex toy. Spermicide condoms can numb the mouth and don't taste very good.
Don't use food products like whipped cream or chocolate sauce with the condom or dental dam because they may be oil-based, and oil-based lubricants break down latex.
For oral sex on a woman or for oral-anal stimulation, use a dental dam, use a plastic food wrap, or cut a condom lengthwise to make your own dental dam. Be sure to place the latex barrier over the entire vulva.
You have increased risk of being exposed to STIs in the following situations: you have gum disease, cuts or sores, you've had recent dental work that bruised any tissue in your mouth or you have vigorously brushed or flossed.


During the 6 weeks after any type of oral or genital piercing, avoid any type of oral sexual contact. Wait 6 weeks even if you are in a mutually monogamous relationship, because until it is completely healed, the piercing is an open wound and provides easy access for bacteria and viruses.

[Charlie Boy II]

I say just wrap your dick up and forget about the rest of it.

The only thing I would watch, is being aware if you get cold sores, not to go down on a chick when you have one. Or any kind of cut on your lip. Even what looks like a tiny paper cut can be caused by the herpes virus.

[misombra]

gonorrhea of the throat. that is pretty ****in nasty.

[Junket]

There's nothing we can say that will be any solution to you beyond what's obvious, and already restated.

It's simply whether you're willing to take the risk or not.

[misombra]

There's nothing we can say that will be any solution to you beyond what's obvious, and already restated.

It's simply whether you're willing to take the risk or not.

the price for sleeping around is very high.

[lesa]

Dental Dams will help prevent transmission. As stated do not have sex if you are not willing to take some type of risk.

[ecojeanne]

i was just thinking....if a woman just got a bikini wax very recent before gettin it on then she could quite possibly pass on an sti easier too right? recently broken skin (the skin can be red raw after a wax)....and this would happen more often than a guy would realise.....

a guy knicked himself while shaving....

[doppelgaenger]

I seriously hope you find yourself a monogamous gribbleworthy relationship, since you value assurance so much.

Anyway, although I've never tried dental dams, I also think they are kind of weird. If you're not going to enjoy it, you're not going to enjoy it.

Your best bet is to be adamant in that you should get checked first. You might also consider raising your standards a little higher, and maybe put the sex off until you're certain this person doesn't have anything. And if you still catch something, well it's practically part of the single life. Which again is why I wish you'd wait for a nicer girl to gamble your risks with, because you don't find that kind of assurance very often.