How do I tell my wife im gay

[Joe1212]

I am Joe, I been married to my wife Ellie for 12 years and we have 3 great kids, they don't know that I have been having a homosexual affair with my best friend Robert who is also married and has kids, his wife and my wife are best friends too. I had a few times had sex with men in high school and college, but when i met Ellie who is so beautiful we got married and the feelings for men went away, but while i was out of town on business I met Robert, we hit off terrificly and so did our wives. I also found out Robert too had experimented with guys in college, we became attracted to each other, we ended up kissing each other and had sex, we now sneak around to be together and have sex, its been going on for the last year now, the other day i was about to tell my wife, but she told me she is pregnant with our 4th baby now. Should I still tell her?

[gartlas]

yep ,,I know its harsh but if u dont its always going to be on the back of your mind , always nagging u with guilt. Its a pretty serious thing - u been cheating on your wife. Imo your a scumbag , but for your own good try and play it down.firstly , dont say your gay say your bi ,and do it quickly so u cant think about it too much..unfortunatey this will probably wreck ur relationship with this robert guy as well though,,dont forget that WHEN u tell ur wife robert will be ferreted out as well..thats no reason not to do it though. For her sake , if not ur own tell her , ur meant to love her right? Hopefully your kids are too young to be affected by this , so its better to tell her now and get it done with than let it stew longer and have it discovered when theyre older. I think you have to tell her , and try and make the divorce I think would happen with most people as pleasant as possible

[ecojeanne]

i dunno, i don't really think its good timing, i think after the baby is born coz the stress might make her miscarry, that would be awful. can't you wait? i assume you're happy to have the child and share the responsibilities as if you were somewhat together but i would say work it out after the baby is born.

[Junket]

Hmm...

Well, either you go gay and divorce, or you stop f*ckin' around and keep it far away from her.

I know some people believe honesty is best, but honestly?

I don't entirely believe that.

So make up your mind and stay true to it, just don't expect a happy ending considering your wife may believe the last 12 years of her life have been a lie.

[Gribble]

I think if you were a real man you'd set aside your personal well-being and focus on your young children. That means growing a pair and cutting off whatever you've got with Robert and never getting involved with another man or woman again, at least until your youngest has left the nest. If you have the strength and the decency to do that, I think you should keep your affair to yourself.

If, however, you can't resist, then yes, tell your wife. She needs to know so that she can take measures to leave and support her children without you.

[Mish]

I am Joe, I been married to my wife Ellie for 12 years and we have 3 great kids, they don't know that I have been having a homosexual affair with my best friend Robert who is also married and has kids, his wife and my wife are best friends too.

Personally, I don't think you are homosexual. If you were homosexual you would not be attracted to women. I would say you are bisexual at best.

I think your issue is mainly not that you are attracted to a man (as well as women), but that you are unable to stop at one partner. I bring this up because it highlights the fact that this is less to do with biological make up and more to do with your will power and choice. It sounds like, the problem you are having is keeping with the choice of a partner you've made. I think you need to find out for yourself where do you stand. If you are unable to stick with one partner then you should divorce and support your children. If you are then you should ceaze what you've been doing. I think you should tell your partner about your cheating in any event.

[Joe1212]

I do love my wife and I want to be there for her and our new baby, how do I break it off with Robert and not hurt him, cause I love him too.

[Mish]

I do love my wife and I want to be there for her and our new baby, how do I break it off with Robert and not hurt him, cause I love him too.

Simply tell him that you love your wife and your family and you can't continue cheating on them and he shouldn't too. If he is any kind of a husband and a father he will understand.

Then stop contact with him.

[Spika]

I do love my wife and I want to be there for her and our new baby, how do I break it off with Robert and not hurt him, cause I love him too.

It's hard situation... Maybe, when you'll have 4-th baby, your feelings to Robert will go away again.... ????

[Junket]

It's hard situation... Maybe, when you'll have 4-th baby, your feelings to Robert will go away again.... ????

What kind of dumbass logic is that?

He already has 3 frikkin' kids, y'think he'll just have another and suddenly he won't like takin' the cock?

Christ.

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

ROTFL Frasbee....thanks for the early morning laugh.

[Gigabitch]

Stop cheating on your wife, you asshole. This isn't about you being "gay", it's about you being a shithead. You have a passel of kids, man. Grow the **** up.

[Bokonon]

Sounds like you are bi, not gay. Put your penis in your pants, forget about Robert's feelings, do NOT tell your wife and remain faithful to her and support your family.

Seriously, are you willing to hurt your wife and FOUR children because you can't be a man enough to recognize that though you may love someone else you have a duty to your family?

[Joe1212]

I really want to do the right thing, I love my wife and my children, but how do I resist the urge or feelings i have for men? Should I see a counselor?

[Gigabitch]

The same way anybody resists the urge to do something they shouldn't. People addicted to gambling steer clear of the casino, right?

You have to cut ties with him.