PLEASE TELL ME:: What's Wrong With Me?!?

[MzConfused]

You all have probably seen posts that I've done before but I feel so low right now. Usually, I write songs & stories to release my stress or my anger or my sadness but I really need someone to talk to.

I am so upset. I feel like the loneliest person ever! I mean, I'm always ther for my friends and even when I get in a relationship, but when I'm so upset, it always seems like I've got no one to talk to.

I've got one best friend because for me, girls tend to be really bitchy. I haven't spoken to the guy I was slowly falling for (another thread) and I just feel so low and so lonely.

The guy I was falling for, told me he kissed his ex and that he was dancing ''really dirty'' with some girls. I had to leave him alone after that, but I just feel so unworthy. I mean people tell me I'm beautiful alot, but I can't see it.

When I look in the mirror I see a girl who no guy wants to be with and who no guy wants and despite the words of my friends saying I am beautiful and would be the perfect girlfriend to any guy in their right man, I don't feel it.

As far as I'm concerned, I'm not beautiful and no matter how many guys come along, it's always the same girl...me...therefore, there must be something wrong.

I give boys 100% trust, I love and care and give 1000s of chances so what is it about me?

Can someone please, please, please tell me what I can do to raise my confidence?

[Henry123]

Its good not to act too clingy or disperate (not saying you are). Its turn off for some guys.

Being too availiable is not good either.

One thing you can do that will effect the way you look is to work out and ask a friend whose good with make overs to pick some good clothes for you (not saying your bad dresser. I just dont know how you dress like).

When you work out your body looks terrific! You become an eye catcher sweetie!

Cheers!

[MzConfused]

Thanks lovely.x

The only insecurity I've kind of got about my body is that I'm not...as developed as he'd like.

I'm really petite like. I'm a tiny girl so I don't have a J-Lo ass and I don't have DD breasts, you know? Being a tiny built girl, I'm not designed to be thick and curvy. I've got a decent figure for my build but not as he'd like.

Also, (And I hope no one takes any offence to this) but people used to tell me I wasn't beautiful because I'm not light skinned. I'm not that dark, I'm...umm...light brown but not mixed race skin light.
This is something that really used to make me cry because that's something I can't change, and I think all races and sizes are beautiful

But he used this to make me feel bad. He used to rub it in my face that his ex was mixed race.

My body's in shape, my skin cannot be changed and I don't know aabout my personality. You know, when your friends say you've got a great personality, it's not the same as when a guy says it.

((I REALLY HOPE I HAVEN'T OFFENDED ANYONE** && IF I HAVE I AM TRULEY SORRY.x)))

[ecojeanne]

omg! that guy sounds like the worst kinda person on this planet him knowing how insecure u were about ur colour right?....girl forget about the things he said to u to upset u and infact forget about what u think other people think of ur looks....u cant judge people on their looks......i bet ur better lookin than u think...and anyway it iS about personality....thats not a bad thing.....i have to say a guy cld be considered completely ugly but if he was funny and intelligent i would be so attracted to him....i dont think im the only one....seriously its completely superficial and moronic to judge people by their looks....dont be so hard on urself

[Kromat]

You must be dating the wrong people, and since you think of yourself not having such a strong personality, they're taking advantage of it.
Even, If things haven't gone your way, show others that your stronger than what they think of you.
Enjoy life with people that make you happy and you'll find someone that likes you for who you are.
Just because your different from others, doesn't mean you should be judged, as every person is unique in their own way.

P.S. I also like to show that what they're saying are just words, and that I know myself before then they do.

[Hot*Commodity]

You all have probably seen posts that I've done before but I feel so low right now. Usually, I write songs & stories to release my stress or my anger or my sadness but I really need someone to talk to.

I am so upset. I feel like the loneliest person ever! I mean, I'm always ther for my friends and even when I get in a relationship, but when I'm so upset, it always seems like I've got no one to talk to.

I've got one best friend because for me, girls tend to be really bitchy. I haven't spoken to the guy I was slowly falling for (another thread) and I just feel so low and so lonely.

The guy I was falling for, told me he kissed his ex and that he was dancing ''really dirty'' with some girls. I had to leave him alone after that, but I just feel so unworthy. I mean people tell me I'm beautiful alot, but I can't see it.

When I look in the mirror I see a girl who no guy wants to be with and who no guy wants and despite the words of my friends saying I am beautiful and would be the perfect girlfriend to any guy in their right man, I don't feel it.

As far as I'm concerned, I'm not beautiful and no matter how many guys come along, it's always the same girl...me...therefore, there must be something wrong.

I give boys 100% trust, I love and care and give 1000s of chances so what is it about me?

Can someone please, please, please tell me what I can do to raise my confidence?

First never change who you are. Your the best! However change the type of people you are drawn too..and when you come across a place (feeling) you have had or been before (with ur heart) trust your feelings.

[michzel creativ]

ecojeanne is right, don't be bothered by your personality.
At least you have a good heart, your boy friend is an idiot.
Look someone else baby..

[1averagejoe]

Your guy friend is a dick. Screw him.

As for your skin, I don't know where you're from but around here that skin color is nice! I'm light as sin...I always used to get made fun when I was a kid because the majority of my school was asian. So I was one of the lightest kids in my class. Is your school/class primarily one color or race?

Also how old are you? You sound very young.

Second I have a feeling you're a really good looking girl, but you're young and insecure. Confidence is probably the most attractive thing to anyone. Both the opposite and same sex. People are attracted to those who are confident. Don't worry about how you look, act like you're comfortable in your skin, don't care what other people think and I guarantee you will be happier.

It's not something you're going to change overnight but you can start right now. It took me years to get over my self esteem and confidence issues. Still working at it a bit, but it's far from what it used to be years ago when I was made fun and teased for the majority of my life.

[RelationshipBud]

It may be best for you to move on.

In addition to writing poetry/songs, keep your eyes open for additional opportunities for active relaxation and frustration relief (ie lift weights, jogging, skating, biking, or even hitting a punching bag!)

Good Luck,
Relationship-Buddy

[MzConfused]

Yea i am quite young but I'm one who's had to grow up quite fast, but I haven't exactly learnt everything. I know i'm not perfect but surely, someone should accept me for me? I shouldn't need to be perfect, should I?

People usually do take advantage of me because I try to be nice all the time because i hate making people unhappy or angry with me

I used to believe I was a pretty girl, but I soon lost that belief after the first guy I ever got interested in.

Most of my school is black & my friends find me fine because it's not a case of me getting teased or anything, it's just a case where so many boys say I'm unattractive because I'm not mixed race. And I don't have a problem with light skinned people but it hurts because I should be fine for who I am.

Also.......no one understands about this boy. The guy i was falling for is a total idiot, but I still miss him & everyone I've told so far has told me I'm an dumb ass idiot because i shouldn't miss him because he's such a low life...but it's not my fault, I can't help that I care for him. Am i wrong for missing him?

How can I get over him? And how can I raise my confidence?xx

[ecojeanne]

well the fact that u kno now what happened was nothing to do with u....purely his hateful attitude im sure ur confidence has gone up...i find comedy the best therapy....books, magazines, jokes, movies and most important ur family and good friends...do some volunteer work...it puts things into perspective

[Henry123]

Thanks lovely.x

The only insecurity I've kind of got about my body is that I'm not...as developed as he'd like.

I'm really petite like. I'm a tiny girl so I don't have a J-Lo ass and I don't have DD breasts, you know? Being a tiny built girl, I'm not designed to be thick and curvy. I've got a decent figure for my build but not as he'd like.

Also, (And I hope no one takes any offence to this) but people used to tell me I wasn't beautiful because I'm not light skinned. I'm not that dark, I'm...umm...light brown but not mixed race skin light.
This is something that really used to make me cry because that's something I can't change, and I think all races and sizes are beautiful

But he used this to make me feel bad. He used to rub it in my face that his ex was mixed race.

My body's in shape, my skin cannot be changed and I don't know aabout my personality. You know, when your friends say you've got a great personality, it's not the same as when a guy says it.

((I REALLY HOPE I HAVEN'T OFFENDED ANYONE** && IF I HAVE I AM TRULEY SORRY.x)))

I dont think your boyfriend is good for you. If you hear something long enough over and over again you start believing it. It gets stuck in your subconcious mind.

Sometimes people get attach to the very people who are abusive to them (not saying you are ). Its a psychological thing. I read stuff about that in psychology books.

Some people use abusive behaviour to control other people. Making them feel worthless and that no body would want them...other than the abusive person himself. It keeps them under control. Its a manipulation strategy they are using.

Funny thing is one of my friends love petite women with smaller breasts. Beleive me there are indeed alot of guys who are head over heels over petite women....lots of them!

Go girl go! Dont let no jerk put you down!

[MzConfused]

Thanksz Everyoneeee.xx

[Gigabitch]

The only thing that needs to change about you is your unfortunate ability to attract bozos. The best advice I can give you is to be very particular in the future about who you let in the door, since you clearly have a tendency to get attached.

This one was unworthy, obviously. I know how you feel- I came to LF years ago because I had a strong attachment to a very unworthy man. It's not the worst problem you could have- it's something you can work with if you learn to simply question your own judgment.

Next time, make the next guy earn it. Don't just give your heart away to a jerk.

And don't worry too much- a lot of this stuff gets better as you get older, guys and friends as well.

[agatha]

It may be best for you to move on.

That's the best thing you would do. Maybe Mr. Right has not yet coming. Maybe in the right time. Just wait. Don't be in a hurry of having someone.

Forget that guy. He don't deserve to be loved.