Going home

[Charlie Boy II]

My flight home is in two and a half weeks. I just got back from a trip to Croatia. It's my last trip and now there's nothing much to do except hang out in Brighton and watch the clock wind down. I was going to do a trip through the alps but I cancelled it so I'll have a reasonable amount of cash in my pocket when I get home. As it was I wouldn't have had two pennies to rub together.

I've been away for nine months. Nine months since I've seen Kristin, my girlfriend in Australia. We broke up when I left. I had a few romances when I was travelling, most notably a Brazillian tornado I spent about three or four weeks travelling with. Some other more forgettable hostel liaisons. But even at the height of my philandering I never had sex with any of them, and by sex I mean old fashioned penis in vagina intercourse, much to the annoyance of the Brazillian girl. "Just stick it in!", she cried one night. "I don't have AIDS!" (her English was only okay).

It was at this time that Kristin was harbouring a lot of resentment about my leaving. She went on a few dates and tried to move on with her life. Nothing serious and nothing "intimate", she tells me.

After travelling for three months I settled in a really cool laid back/hippy sort of town about an hour south of London in England. It was about this time Kristin and I started to talk on the phone more. Soon enough I lost my appetite for other girls. I started doing a lot of training for this trip I just did to Croatia, which involved a series of island crossings by swimming. I am a keen ocean swimmer from back home. I went out less, but still the odd bender.

Around two months ago Kristin and I got back together. We're so close right now, and pretty much all I think about is seeing her again. She's never stopped being on my mind. Even the Brazillian called her "the unforgettable Kristin". She has an exam the morning I fly in so we're going to meet in the evening down at our favourite beach. Oh man, I can't wait.

And my family, my friends - and surfing!

I guess it'll be weird though, right? Seeing Kristin again after so long. In a funny way I think this separation has been a real positive for us.

Anyway, that's the story so far.

[bluesummer]

Oh, CB, I'm just dying to hear how this long saga finally unfolds.

I think this experience was probably good for the both of you. It's like you really came to realize her worth the longer you were gone. Good luck buddy. Happy trip home.

[lesa]

Wow, you ARE living life to the fullest, just as it should be . Happy traveling.

[Charlie Boy II]

Oh, CB, I'm just dying to hear how this long saga finally unfolds.

I think this experience was probably good for the both of you. It's like you really came to realize her worth the longer you were gone. Good luck buddy. Happy trip home.

yeah you're exactly right. I've grown up a lot. I used to have a fairly arrogant attitude to my relationships. Not overtly hostile or anything like that, but there was always an underlying feeling of "there's plenty more where she came from" which at certain ages isn't such a bad thing. I think it also stemmed a little from watching my parents' relationship. I mean I have the best parents in the world but my mum dominates my dad something fierce, not that he minds at all. He's one of the most laid back guys in the world. But as a son watching your dad being put in his place all the time... it's hard.

But you're exactly right, along with a number of other lessons this trip has taught me the real value of my relationship back home. Kristin's noticed it as well.

[DoesntMatter]

What an experience

This is like a cliffhanger for the whole forum, everyone is gonna be waiting to see your thread once you get back lol

[anachronistic]

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJ6VT7ciR1o"]YouTube - There's No Place Like Home[/ame]

[misombra]

oh charlieboy i'm so happy for you!!!

good love is very hard to find. very hard.

[Junket]

I was gonna say man, you always seemed kinda indifferent towards this Kristin, I expected you'da stuck with that Brazilian chick. Those chicks are HOOOOOOOOOOOT.

Good to see things are going well with you in general.

Damn, I remember when you first started talking about leaving for this trip. Has that much time passed?

[Mish]

I'm glad you finally came back to your senses, from your descriptions that girl is one in a million. It's good to see your imminent reunion about to unfold. I'm happy for the two of you and that everything worked out well in the end.

I have a feeling this will be a happy ever after

[Charlie Boy II]

I was gonna say man, you always seemed kinda indifferent towards this Kristin, I expected you'da stuck with that Brazilian chick. Those chicks are HOOOOOOOOOOOT.

haha yar Brazilians are hot, but Kristin is no slouch either.

[Gigabitch]

Just so you know, not everyone would be down with that "it wasn't sex" conclusion you've drawn. You didn't **** anybody. Not at all the same thing.

You came in her mouth. She swallowed it. It was sex. Oral sex, yes, but sex nonetheless, and if you've told Kristin that you didn't have sex or that you weren't "intimate" (another slippery word, pun totally intended), then it's quite possible that she could conclude that you're lying.

I have no idea how she feels about these things. If Cali Boy told me he never had sex with someone and I later learned that she blew him several times, I'd chew his wiener off. Of course, we've already established that Kristin is much cooler about this stuff than I am, but maybe that's just because she hasn't had as much experience with the embitterment that follows being lied to.

It's not too late to turn her in to a bitch. Don't do it. I hope you come clean about it. She can take it, and it's better than deceiving her.

[bluesummer]

I would rather hear the truth than be told nothing happened, only to find out later that it did.

Think on it CB.

[Charlie Boy II]

It's funny I hadn't even considered I was lying to or even being deceitful with Kristin. For me a blow job isn't sex, its foreplay. Kristin knows I've "seen" other girls, she isn't under the impression that I've been a monk over here. I mean, the fact is we were broken up. And we made a clear agreement that we weren't going to inflict the gory details on each other before we left. What's the point? I know she's dated other guys and other than that she didn't sleep with any of 'em I have no idea what they get up to. I don't want to know.

If she asks for more details I'll tell her. I've always prided myself on my honesty. But I'd be lying if I said your post didn't get me thinking Giga. My exact words to her were "I have seen girls, but I haven't slept with anyone while I've been over here." Do you really think I need to clarify that statement?

[Charlie Boy II]

Well, Giga's post got me to thinking and I called Kristin to make sure we were singing from the same hymn book. After exchanging a few pleasantries, the conversation went more or less like this,

"babe, I want to check something. You know I've seen other girls over here, right?"
And she says "yeah,"
"And you know I said I hadn't had sex with any of them,"
"yeah"
"And you know I meant sex by that, right as in sex, sex. That doesn't mean I haven't, like...."
"oh my god, oh my god, don't say any more I don't want to hear it."
"alright, alright."
Do you want me to tell what what I've been doing?"
"No!"
"Exactly. I'm not naive. I just don't want the details. I don't want that picture in my head. That's what happened with Stacey and it grossed me out. I just don't want that image." (she's referring to when she asked me if I'd had sex with a good friend of mine called Stacey and I said no but we'd seen each other for a little while and done "everything else.")

And I'm exactly the same. I don't mind at all if Kristin had a few romances while I was away - that was part of our agreement after all - I just don't want to know anything about it. Anyway it was a good thing to clarify. In fact it sounds like Kristin was dating guys for some time after I retired myself. In my mind that's not a bad thing. Both of us are pretty secure people and I think that's the main reason this unorthodox arrangement looks like it's going to work out. We know our respective diversions don't mean anything. For both of us, they've just made us more certain that we're getting back together because that's exactly where we want to be. Every couple should do it haha. A sort of relationship sabbatical.

[Mish]

I don't think every couple should do it, those are waters of uncertainty and you know it. You should count your lucky stars that it worked out the way it did, it could've easily gone the other way.

That being said I'm glad it worked out for the best for you, I'm happy to know what happened happened for the best, you guys look good together.