Battle of the Exes

[bluesummer]

There's still ex-drama in my life, and I don't know how to solve it.

See, my loser ex still owes me money. I mean, I supported his sorry ass for four years while he partied, so he owes me for that....but that's not recuperable. He actually owes me money for a truck he bought on a loan in my name, and also the legal fees for our divorce.....a total of about $3500. He keeps giving me some sob story about how he's broke, but he really WANTS to pay me, and he WILL....whenever he can.

Then I find out he's going to Vegas in two days and also paying his loser girlfriend's way. So I'm pissed.

What's worse is, it's upsetting my bf. He hates seeing me upset, and he knows I am. I keep saying "Oh, I should just take the hit for the money...." and he is adamant that I do NOT. He's furious at my ex.

I've had friends offer to send their seedy friends over to 'talk to him' if you know what I mean....but I think that would just piss him off. He is a real stubborn bastard, and a huge manipulator. Any ideas of what I can do to make him pay up? I'm at my wits end with him.

[Charlie Boy II]

Take him in to see Judge Judy. I love her.

[misombra]

leave him alone. you'll never see the money. it's not worth the stress of even trying.

just delete him from your life and your thoughts before he causes misery in your perfectly decent current relationship.

but wait, the truck should've been included in the divorce papers. did you guys do pro se or did you get a lawyer?

[DoesntMatter]

Yeah, forget the "seedy friends" idea. What this guy needs is a huge muscular guy, preferably black, to scare the hell out of him. HE needs to go and not ask for the money, but tell him to have it in like 3 days. And if he doesn't, you do "something," this is where there is some room for creative thinking. Your ex sounds like a dimwit and he wouldn't know what some guys can do, although I don't know if these seedy friends of yours are genuine bad guys or not

[Charlie Boy II]

I don't know why but I find women talking about their divorces really sexy. I used to love hearing about the Brazillian's divorce. I guess that's kind of screwy. I think it's because it makes them sound all grown up, or something.

[lesa]

My advice is not good but is from experience. Let the money and the things he owe you go (maybe not the truck loan though).

It's going to hurt you more than it will ever hurt him if you keep contacting him for repayment.

[DoesntMatter]

Maybe cause they get kind of riled up and fiesty over it

[Charlie Boy II]

Like when they talk about changing their joint credit-cards and talking about their "ex-husbands". It turns me into putty.

[Citycat]

Find someone to stick a shovel up his ass! (got this idea from watching Big Stan last night)

[bluesummer]

We did the divorce ourselves....no lawyers. Way cheaper.

Plus, the issue witht the truck is this: We took out a loan for the truck for $18,000....his sister had to cosign with me at the time. When we broke up, he 'sold' the truck to MY sister....for $13,000. The balance on the loan was $16,000 at that time and he agreed to take a hit because it was fair due to depreciation and what not. So my sister has the truck and makes the loan payments. She couldn't afford to get a loan herself, and she had two little kids and no car. So this was a way to help her out until she's back on her feet.

So, I can't sue him for the money, because what I did was kind of sketchy.....I 'gave away' an asset I'm still owing money on. The bank would not be happy with this, even if my sister IS making the payments. It's supposed to remain in my possession until the debt is paid off.

I want to walk away from it all, but my bf thinks it's wrong to let him get away with it. A male ego thing, maybe?

[anachronistic]

If you really care about the money, start documenting every conflict with him you have. You can start by writing down his past procrastinations. If you have evidence that he's going to vegas, keep a record of it for yourself and make copies.

What a slimy bastard.

My mother has been holding a grudge on my father since they divorced almost 2 decades ago. He still owes her $7000 in child support, and somehow, he's managed to avoid that all this time.

It may be really hard to get the money back, unfortunately. Has he paid off most of the loan back to you? Is the truck registered under your name? Maybe you can take ownership of it, if so.

edit: Oh damn, nevermind about the truck. That sucks balls. I hope you find comfort in the idea that what goes around comes around.

[Charlie Boy II]

We did the divorce ourselves....no lawyers. Way cheaper.

Plus, the issue witht the truck is this: We took out a loan for the truck for $18,000....his sister had to cosign with me at the time. When we broke up, he 'sold' the truck to MY sister....for $13,000. The balance on the loan was $16,000 at that time and he agreed to take a hit because it was fair due to depreciation and what not. So my sister has the truck and makes the loan payments. She couldn't afford to get a loan herself, and she had two little kids and no car. So this was a way to help her out until she's back on her feet.

So, I can't sue him for the money, because what I did was kind of sketchy.....I 'gave away' an asset I'm still owing money on. The bank would not be happy with this, even if my sister IS making the payments. It's supposed to remain in my possession until the debt is paid off.

^^^^ stop it, you're killing me.

[misombra]

sorry bsummer. your boyfriend is going to have to calm down. he's probably worrying about it so much because you are.

i say give it up. even if you did sue him you'd get nothing.

if your boyfriend wants to do something, tell him to send a friend to beat his ass or pull a drive by on his house. but still, you're not going to see any money from him. but it sure would be worth the pain!

[bluesummer]

What really got my goat last night was that his gf posted some thing on her Facebook mocking me, saying "Funny how people change when it comes to money! How pathetic!"

I'd like to slap them both stupid.

[misombra]

well, i'm sure her attitude will change when he cheats on her a million times.