Confused about this girl I like - help / advice appreciated

[grumpyuncle]

Hi, here's my situation as far as I see it:

There's a girl I like. A lot. I've known her for just over 2 years now and we've always got on, I think. For about 18 months I've really liked her.

Soon after I realised I liked her we spent an evening chatting, drinking, and ultimately spent the night together. After that though she made out that she wasn't interested and went weird for a month or two, not really being herself around me. This meant our relationship, friendship or whatever it was by then was kinda on the abckburner for 6 months. Eventually however we got back to where we had been and all seemed fine again. I worked hard to forget about her in an amorous way and succeeded. This was fine until a few months ago when I just couldn't get her out of my head.

About a month ago we ended up together in bed again. This time she hasn't acted like before after the event and in fact I'm not really sure what is going on as I can't tell what she's thinking, what she means when she does stuff etc. I'll try and give some ideas of the things that have happened this past month:

Firstly, the night we ended up together was a night when we'd been out again, drinking yes, and I needed a place to kip so she said I could stay at hers. She made me sleep in the bed and when she arrived one thing led to another. ANyway, the other night we were out again and although at the time I didn't think this, she was asking me if I had a question to ask her. I wonder now if that was her trying to get me to ask if I could kip at hers again?

She dyed her hair and seemed very interested in what I thought.

I guess the main thing is that what happened happened a second time and now she seems comfortable with it. I don't really know what's going on and have no idea what to do.

Any thoughts on what is going on here? Even if we were both drinking each time something happened there must be something for it to still happen? Especially as this second time she seemed ok about what happened the morning after, and since.

Any advice on what to do? I'm scared to just broach the subject and truly say what I feel because I'll then likely end up scaring her away from even talking to me and thats not what I want. Especially as we work in the same office (diff teams though) - so having the girl refuse to talk to me as a friend for ever more would not be much fun.

Thanks for your help.

[Cain]

Offices romances are always risky. If the relationship fails, it makes for a very awkward working environment.

Anyways, does it really matter? Maybe she just had time to think about it and realized that there was nothing wrong with what happened between you two.

I wouldn't analyze this too much if I were you. Just let it go. If it happens again, then I'd be concerned.

[Zehx]

I would avoid a relationship anywhere that it might cause awkwardness, because if it turns out anything less than perfect your entire life becomes messed up because you cant get away from it at work, you cant get away from it home because your used to hanging out with her, you'll toss and turn.

I'm just saying be careful .. heartbreak does crazy things to people.

[grumpyuncle]

Thanks for the advice guys. Understand re: the office thing.

Cain - concerned how?

Bearing in mind the office romance / bad thing issue what do you think she thinks? Does it seem like she actually has some feelings or is it just one of those one (two) offs?

[Cain]

Maybe concerned wasn't the best word.

Basically, I was saying don't over analyze it. If it happens again and she tries to push you away, then you're right to think there's something else going on.